"I hate INFP", can I be saved?

About "workplace tragedy", how do babies survive in modern society?

1. What is INFP?

You may have done the popular MBTI test on the internet, but those questions are always ambiguous and the translation cavity is confusing; Words often fail to convey meaning, and it is difficult for people who have not systematically studied MBTI theory to understand the true meaning of questions and options, thus obtaining specious results. Emotional fluctuations, state changes and different interpretations of the same question and option can easily lead to great changes in the test results of MBTI.

The earliest source of MBTI is Jung's "psychological type". Jung divided people into introversion and extroversion at first, and then combined intuition, feeling, emotion and thinking to form eight extreme types to divide them. But at the same time, Jung also stressed that no one is absolutely introverted, and no one is absolutely introverted, because people will be influenced by internal and external factors, including the application of the four basic psychological functions is only a habitual attitude and preference, not an absolute one-size-fits-all.

Most people's scores in these dimensions are concentrated in the middle, and their tendency is also vacillating. Therefore, we must realize: 1. The classification of MBTI still has its limitations; Second, your type is often phased and changeable.

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Under this cognitive premise, let's look at what INFP usually looks like.

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The first letters of 1 and INFP stand for introversion. Introverts usually pay more attention to their subjective attitude towards objective things, and their subjective tendencies and opinions are only released through their influence on the object, which goes beyond the objective environment. In other words, they pay more attention to themselves and their intrinsic value. Because introverts pay attention to their inner spiritual world, they are more easily controlled by "self". Through compensation, the influence of objects will be amplified and strengthened in their unconsciousness. The more ego tries to dominate itself through struggle and maintain its independence, freedom and leading position, the easier it is to be enslaved by objective facts and bound by economic dependence, morality, public will and social relations. This kind of struggle leads to the separation between myself and the external environment, so I have to establish a conventional defense system and build a high heart wall to defend my values and ideals. On the one hand, they want to impose their will on the outside world to protect themselves, on the other hand, they spend their energy on self-defense, but the outside world is always independent of their will, and the resistance of external objects makes them confused and unable to solve it. Because the influence of foreign objects is mixed with fear, they often shrink back and dare not express themselves and their views clearly. They are afraid of aggravating the external influence on them, and anything strange and new will cause fear and distrust.

For introverts, interaction with the outside world will consume their energy, and they must be nourished on their own island, which includes their own private space, several interpersonal relationships that they trust wholeheartedly, and their inner spiritual world.

2.INFP's second letter indicates that the way to collect information comes from intuition. The subjective factor of intuition is more restrained in extroverted attitude, but it becomes the decisive factor in introverted attitude. Introverted people's intuition may be stimulated by external objects, but introverted intuition focuses not on external possibilities, but on what external objects release from the inside, which is similar to "seeing the essence through phenomena" and tends to look at the internal images behind the scene, ignoring the perception of nerve stimulation. In real life, it may be manifested as follows: the person who feels partial will observe and remember the buildings and shops he passes by; For people with intuitive preferences, this building or shop needs to be meaningful to him, such as being a landmark or frequenting it, otherwise it will not be noticed after passing by for a hundred times. Only those who feel partial can truly taste the taste pleasure brought by the food itself or the beautiful scenery on the road; People with intuitive preferences pay less attention to the enjoyment of these senses and details, and pay more attention to artistic conception. At the same time, introverted intuition has an unusually rich imagination, and it pursues spirit and image more unconstrained. From the point of view of direct utility, it is meaningless to indulge in unrealistic fantasies, and this universal prejudice is also one of the root causes of INFP's easy depression.

Ni Xing is usually a natural artist and visionary, and is more likely to indulge in mysterious fields such as religion and divination. A Ni-type person, if he is not lucky enough to engage in these jobs that give full play to his imagination and "sixth sense", can usually only become a "loser" who is ignorant of the world and has no achievements. At the same time, introverts lack the ability or desire to express themselves, and can't show their rich and profound spiritual world to the outside world at all, which often gives people a feeling of formality, secrecy, indifference, impermanence and embarrassment. This sense of desolation and worthlessness, as well as the misunderstanding and unfair degradation they have suffered, often run counter to their self-requirements, which makes them fall into the inner vortex and consume their energy constantly in internal friction.

In addition, a Ni who excessively succumbs to inner perception will make her unconscious personality rely too much on objects, senses and impressions through compensation, thus producing obsessive-compulsive psychological symptoms, such as depression, tension and some kind of complex.

3.INFP's third letter indicates that the basis of analysis and decision-making comes from feeling. Introverted emotional preferences mostly appear in women, who may be less logical, more delicate and less analytical, and tend to look at things from a personal perspective. At the same time, introverts and emotional (Fi) preference-oriented people often give people a pleasant impression of peace or harmony by peaceful and unobtrusive external behavior, or hide under the mask of innocence or mediocrity, and neither want to be outstanding nor intentionally expose themselves. When confronted with the invasion and aggressive influence from the outside world, they will quickly withdraw their emotions and show indifference, vigilance and doubt until the other person's passion gradually calms down, otherwise it is difficult for them to make an appropriate response.

NF type is famous for its idealism, and the combination of intuition and emotion makes them particularly sensitive to the needs of others. They have a strong sense of responsibility and loyalty, but they have a high tolerance for others, and it is their perfectionism that makes them particularly vulnerable to setbacks.

4. The fourth letter of 4.INFP represents that life attitude prefers perception. Emotional people think that life is only about experience and understanding. They don't like telling people what to do, but they are willing to listen to what others are saying. They want to know all the "what" and "why". They are children whose curiosity can never be satisfied. The perceptual type is not as narrow and harsh as their relative judgment type. They are good at seeing other people's opinions. INFP uses perception to resolve their impulses and prejudices caused by intuition and emotional functions, which also endows INFP with great openness, kindness, understanding and tolerance, giving them more room to exert their insight and making it easier for them to gain the trust of others.

Second, are you really INFP? "I hate INFP", can I be saved?

People's psychology is too complicated, and the description of INFP is still general and biased.

Some people say that INFP is a basket and everything can be put in it. Due to the external manifestations of many characteristics of INFP, it is very similar, confused or simply consistent with some "bad habits" that are excluded and highlighted by mainstream values in modern society, such as: low thinking, laziness, fatigue, procrastination, three-minute fever, indecision, sentimentality, obsessive-compulsive disorder, indifference, inaccessibility, loss, waste and so on. There are some "neutral people" whose INFP tendency is not obvious. Sometimes, when they are at a low point, they will find an "idealistic" and "emotional" excuse for their loss by labeling themselves INFP. Based on the wrong understanding of INFP, labeling yourself as wrong to seek psychological comfort will, in turn, form a strengthened psychological hint of your loss and waste.

In fact, under the seemingly or temporarily "mourning" and "scrapping" behavior mode, the real INFP is full of enthusiasm, and this enthusiasm will only be poured out in the relationship that makes them fully comfortable and secure. At the same time, their judgment on everything depends on emotions and personal values. They know very well what is most important to them and spare no effort to protect it. It's not that they don't like struggle and hard work, but they just want their work to have the value that conforms to their true ideals, not just representing salary, stability, face, or other bullshit reasons.

Zhuangzi said that even the big tree Ailanthus altissima, which is "out of ink", "out of regulation" and "standing on the ground regardless of craftsmen", can also be "a tree without land and a field without land", and can wander around it at will and "lie under it". Isn't INFP, the "workplace tragedy" that yearns for freedom and a broad spiritual world, that seemingly useless tree?

An INFP who is really sharp enough to interrogate his heart, who tries hard enough to become a "normal person" but ultimately fails, when he really wakes up one day and longs for change, what he should do is:

First of all, you should understand that you can "miss the rope ink" and "miss the rules", you can't change the rope ink and rules, you can't change your own varieties, but you can't stop trying to grow;

Secondly, you must know that if you are a real INFP, your heart will never allow you to really compromise, even though you often think that you can't overcome the reality in life and can't see any way out. You may try to go to a university you don't like as a normal person, study a major you don't like, do a job you don't like under the expectation of your family, and even have a demand and desire for material and secular things under the brainwashing of the environment. But there will be a voice in your heart telling you that this is not the life you want.

Finally, you should know that although you are gifted and knowledgeable, you never lack enthusiasm, but you just have nowhere to put it. Once you find the meaning that you are willing to devote yourself to, you can go all the way. At the same time, you sometimes have to rely on fate to send such opportunities to your eyes. You think you can definitely find it keenly and catch it in time, because you have enough sense of smell. However, in fact, your heart knows that this is ridiculous. You are so curtilage, your circle is so narrow, and your world is just such a small sea. How many tens of thousands of years will it take for that drift bottle that you want to run aground on your beach?

INFP, no one can help you. You need to kick yourself.

1, face up to your inner desire.

INFP doesn't need much material, so it's common for people to live like hermits. They also think that they are easy to be satisfied. They avoid commercial self-marketing by giving up the success of commercialization and define themselves as gaining inner peace. You may have worked hard, but you always miss all the fashion trends and even run counter to them. You always get along with most people. You'd rather be alone, keep some cats and rabbits and talk to the soul in the book.

But in fact, INFP's productivity does not lag behind people in any way, and it is not completely lacking in social skills. INFP people can do other types of things they can do by pushing themselves, but they can do other types of things they can't do in their own fields, and they pay special attention to their work. We should know that INFP is not only a philosopher and an artist, but also a healer and mediator.

The similarity between the two is that the real driving force of INFP lies in a channel to express inner ideals and beliefs to the outside world. In fact, you are eager for a channel of expression to release the energy and emotions that are flooding your heart. Without this channel, when the interpersonal relationship is not ideal, you may appear sensitive and fragile, leading to incompetence and inferiority, loss of confidence in life and trust. Once you find this channel, your loyalty will provide you with direction, strength and goal, and make you shine.

The difference between the two lies in the way of expression. One pays more attention to your creativity, and the other pays more attention to your insight into people's hearts. At the same time, they also achieve the same goal through different routes, and finally point to the spiritual carrier-people.

In the fields related to people's hearts, INFP's talent in intuition and emotion can be brought into play, such as consultation, education, literature, art, language and so on. Of course, due to the influence of introverted personality, INFP will be better at private and written communication and expression.

Sometimes you have to go along with them.

Now you understand that you are not a "workplace tragedy", but because of your easy-going nature and other reasons, you have engaged in an "ordinary career" that does not require creativity or insight. You are a born "noble" and not suitable for being a screw in an industrial society. You are a big tree that is not suitable for cutting down as a building material. You need free air. Maybe what you are thinking now is "the natural combination of eggs". If you can bravely pursue free air and spiritual wilderness, then you are not INFP, and you may have become a poor and starving street artist.

You're right, but please take your eyes back, take them back a little. Not only professional painters, writers, philosophers and psychologists can give full play to your artistic and emotional talents-for example, if you are good at writing, you may think that business soft writing is also writing? You are neither good at nor disdainful. Your business sense has always been weak, and your writing and subject matter are often unpopular. But dear, you have such a unique power to infect people's hearts, and your potential to sell Amway is unparalleled. What you need to do is to actively write more, practice more and promote more, that's all, and so are other fields. When your wings are growing, you can break away from those damn shackles and fly high into the sky.

3. Let your perfectionism take a vacation first.

The last thing that stops you from setting sail is your perfectionism. You want to make sure everything is the best. If you are met with cold reception and criticism, you will easily shrink back. There is a starry war in my mind, but I can't say one tenth when I open my mouth. You think you may not have talent.

However, there is no road in this world that goes straight to the end. No matter how talented a genius is, he is not born knowing what to do and has done works like Tuo. Give your perfectionism a break and allow yourself to do some "vulgar" and "meaningless" exercises, which are not prominent enough, not bright enough, not novel enough, not interesting enough, not even close to perfection at all, or even far from your imagination. Remember, that's only because you haven't mastered the skill of releasing talents perfectly for the time being. This technology, a skill, can be learned through practice and exploration, and you are the best in understanding.

INFP is not a disease, mourning and waste just go to the bottom, what is lacking is kicking you and kicking yourself. Anyone can find a way out as long as they fully tap their own strengths. INFP's journey begins with finding the connection between spirit and reality.

If you really can't find it, come to A Mu to tie it.