Widely accept jokes.

Let me show you some jokes. Have fun, hehe. ...

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Function of cowhide

The teacher asked Tom in the common sense class, "Do you know the function of cowhide?" Tom scratched his head and said, "I don't know." "I know," his deskmate raised his hand and said it was used to wrap beef together. "

Borrow transcripts

The teacher asked Jimmy, "Why did you lend your report card to John?" "No, I didn't mean to." Jimmy naively replied, "He said, trying to scare his parents." And the result? "The teacher asked again. As a result, "Jimmy replied," John's ass is swollen. "

The way men think.

High flyers Miller, an agronomy major in a university, returned to his hometown in the summer vacation. A neighbor's wife wanted to raise chickens and get rich, so she came to him for advice. Miller told her that according to all kinds of data provided by his wife, it is more appropriate to raise about 30 hens and one or two cocks. At the end of the summer vacation, Miller wanted to see how his "idea" was realized. But he froze in front of the henhouse. There are 30 hens and 30 big cocks in it. "Madam, thirty hens, as long as one or two cocks is enough. Too many cocks can't lay eggs, but waste food. " "You mean, let one or two cocks keep so many hens?" The neighbor's wife said with a red face. "yes." "This is just your man's way of thinking, I won't do it!"

Learning and applying in practice

A law school in the United States, one day took the criminal law exam. The first question the professor asked the students was: "What is the crime of fraud?" A student replied, "if you don't let me take the exam, it's fraud." The professor was very surprised. "How do you explain? Which student can answer this question? A student said: "According to the criminal law, anyone who takes advantage of others' ignorance to make them suffer losses belongs to fraud. "

This is called laziness.

In class, the teacher assigned a composition. The topic is: What is laziness? In the evening, the teacher corrects the composition under the light. When he opened jeffers's composition book, he found that the first page was blank, and then the second page was blank. Only on the third page did he see a line. "This is called laziness!"

Why is it wrong?

Mom: "Your teacher complains that you always make mistakes in your homework for a month. Why? " "Son:" When I do something right, she will kiss me. "

Who created everything?

The teacher of a religious school sharply asked the students in class, "Who do you think created everything in the world?" ? "There was silence in the classroom, and everyone held their breath and dared not go out of the classroom into the atmosphere. The teacher didn't hear the answer for a long time, and he was even more angry and said, "I insist that you say it!" "who?" As he spoke, the light bulb stared at a student. The student stood up trembling and said, "teacher, not me!" " achievement

After the mid-term exam, the math teacher will announce the results. He said,' There are as many people with 90 points or more as those with 80 points or more; There are as many people with 80 points or above as those with 70 points or above. Just kidding, the whole class cheered, and a classmate asked,' What about the number of people who failed?' The teacher's simple answer is that as many people fail as the whole class.

Anecdotes of vending machines

This is the final exam. I always stay up late at night. I'm hungry. Of course, eating instant noodles is the most convenient ... There is an instant noodle vending machine in the dormitory. I was wondering which is better, broth noodles or sesame chicken noodles. Think about it, just press them together and look at the next one! ! ! The result is "black pepper beef noodles".

Funny English jokes! ! Investigator: What is your father's snake? : little brother: happy! ! Investigator: What is your mother's snake? Little brother: Smile! Investigator: Are you kidding? : little brother: no! ! That's my sister! ! I'm kidding! ! : Bye bye.

English class .....

This is what my sister told me ... One day, they were having an English class ... The teacher asked the students to name common English words ... The first student said: OK ... The second student said: thank you ... Later, he called a classmate ... He stood up and said that the shirt ... was a stone. A shirt is a shirt. ....

Smile in the underworld

Once in a Chinese class, the teacher asked the overseas Chinese student some related idioms in order to understand his Chinese level. "Can you say an idiom to describe a person who is very happy? The Chinese teacher gave a question and said, "However, it is better to have a number in this idiom, such as one, two, three, four ... The foreign student thought about it and said happily," I see, Jiuquan is smiling! Ha! What a "Laughing Jiuquan"! The whole class burst into laughter, and the old Chinese teacher almost fainted.

erect

A monitor sleeps in class and asks his classmates to call him after class. The students played a trick on him. Get up, class is over! The monitor rubbed his eyes: Stand up! At this time, only a dozen students stood up in a daze and said, thank you, teacher!

Learn English.

Once when I was tutoring a junior high school student, I found these horrible words in his English textbook: Dad is dead (bus), my brother is dead (yes), my brother is dead (girl) and my sister is dead (Mis? ) ...... Death ray (school)

Geography exam

In the geography exam, the teacher asked the students to briefly describe the following places: Arabia, Singapore, Cape of Good Hope, Rome, Nagoya and Macau. Among them, Xiao Ming wrote: Once upon a time, there was an old man named Arabia. One day, he went out to climb the mountain. When he climbed to Singapore, he suddenly saw a Rome with a Cape of Good Hope coming straight at him. He was so scared that he started to run to Nagoya and soon closed Macao.

A freshman in college catering bought a scone. He was walking on the road when a big car came in front of him. In a panic, scones fell under the wheels. When the car passed by, the freshmen who were regretting were surprised to find that the scones were embedded in the ground intact! In order not to waste, he decided to pick up scones, but he didn't pick them up with his hands. When he was in trouble, a kind old man happened to pass by. After knowing the situation, the old man immediately took out a fried dough stick from his schoolbag and saw a bang. Scones should come out by hand!

practised

The professor is taking an ethics class. He told the students how to remind others of some embarrassing things. For example, if you see a girl with grass clippings on her ass, you should politely say,' Girl, you have grass clippings on your shoulders'. The girl looked down at her shoulder and then "saw". At this time, a female student raised her hand and stood up and said,' Professor, the zipper of your tie is open!'

girl student

One night, I was wandering on the platform of a voracious society, and I couldn't help staring at a woman with long hair. As soon as she approached, the woman suddenly stopped and stared at me. Yu Daoan, "I'm not very handsome"! But when I saw Yi's eyes wide open and her mouth twitching, I sighed, "Am I too ugly?" ? But see the bigger Iraq's eyes, the more Zhang Yue opens her mouth. I'm afraid I'll always be a real gentleman. I've never offended her, let alone met her. I tried to turn around, but suddenly I heard Iraq shout. . . . . . Ah. . Strange. ! ! "。 Yi rubbed his nose and drifted away. I'm already sweating.

mosquito-repellent incense

When I was in high school, I slept in the lower bunk and couldn't hang mosquito nets. A classmate bought a mosquito-repellent incense. People asked what brand it was, and the answer was "Male Mosquito Music". No one understands its meaning. He explained: only female mosquitoes suck blood, and male mosquitoes have no straws. This mosquito-repellent incense does not kill innocent people, but only works for female mosquitoes. Everyone asked, "How do you call male mosquito music?" "Female mosquitoes have been smoked, and male mosquitoes are not just the opportunity. ......

The story of cockroaches

One of my classmates is surnamed Zhang. One day, he was alone with a girl he had admired for a long time. They chatted while eating snacks. Suddenly, the girl called out "Zhang Lang", and he was so happy that he almost fainted. The dream woke up soon, and the girl said there was half a cockroach on the biscuit he was holding!

twice

When I first entered school, I took the student code and everyone copied it. There are two of them: those who cheated twice in college advised them to drop out of school. Married people advised him to drop out of college. My eyes are not good. When I handed out the paper, I found it was copied. Those who have been married twice in college are advised to drop out.

African wild boar

The biology teacher is describing the appearance of African wild boar on the stage with great interest. Occasionally, when she scanned the stage, she found that most students were dozing off. So he was furious and shouted, "Look at me! Don't look at me, how do you know what African wild boar looks like? "

Jokes of middle school English teachers

When I was in high school, English teacher D had a high level of English, but his Chinese was not good. One day in class, Teacher D explained the "independent structure" and gave a classic example: "The teacher came into the classroom with a book under his arm." Then translated into Chinese: "The teacher came into the classroom with a book under his crotch." I immediately laughed in class.

Give a mark

This is a joke told by the head teacher. Once upon a time, an old gentleman graded his students and only gave them three points. The best is bullshit, the second is bullshit, and the worst is fart dog.

Pig slayer

Students are diligent students. He works part-time during the winter and summer vacations to earn tuition. Help the butcher cut meat during the day and work in the hospital at night. One night, an old woman had to undergo surgery because of an emergency, and a student wheeled her into the operating room. The old lady glanced at Jia Sheng and suddenly cried in horror, "My God! You are a pig killer. Where are you pushing me? 」

Midnight cock crow

In junior high school, there was a chapter in English class called "Midnight Cockcrow". During the teacher's lecture, Dai Shun spoke a little about the root of an English word: landlord, which is composed of land and owner-"land+owner" means "landlord". Then, the teacher asked everyone: What does the motherland mean? "landlady!" Everyone answered with one voice.

The professor said ....

One day, a professor suddenly stopped teaching and told everyone earnestly: if the students sitting in the middle can be as quiet as the students sitting in the back playing cards, then the students sleeping in front will not be disturbed.

philosophy department

A gentleman graduated from the philosophy department of Duff University. I can't find a job after graduation and have been unemployed at home. One day, a college classmate introduced him to work in Muka Zoo, and he went happily. It turned out that a tiger in the zoo was temporarily ill and was taken to the hospital. He was asked to put on tiger skin for the time being. He thought that no one could tell it was him anyway, so he agreed. After putting on the tiger skin and putting it in the cage, he dutifully walked around pretending to be a tiger. It didn't take long for the cage to open and another tiger came in. He was so scared that he retreated to the corner. The tiger kept approaching him ... When he finally retreated to no way back, the tiger spoke. ..

Don't be afraid, man! I'm from the philosophy department of National Taiwan University! '

get an electric shock

This summer vacation ... I went to the hospital for an internship ... and a very exaggerated thing happened. ....

There is a teaching hospital in our school ... the road outside the hospital is being repaired ... so it is full of holes. ...

It was all sand and stones ... one day ... passers-by passed by ... sand got into shoes ... so ... I was standing by the electric stove on the side of the road ... [Electric fire bar is called ... telephone pole ... I was fighting for my feet with an electric stove stick in my right hand ... He tried to shake off the sand on his feet ... and then came Guo Passerby B, who thought passerby A got an electric shock. .......

(mythical god) descended to earth

This is a true story that happened in the senior dormitory:

Brother Fage made a new girlfriend, and everyone praised how beautiful his girlfriend was ... One day, Brother Fage sat at his desk and looked at his girlfriend's photo with envy, saying,' It's really like a fairy coming down to earth ...' His roommate was curious for a moment and couldn't help but want to borrow photos to see the fairy coming down to earth, ready to be' surprised'; As a result, there was only one question after reading it:' When did you come to the world as a fairy ...' Did you land with your face first?'

What's your name?

There is a shy little boy who likes beautiful women with elegant gestures. Shy, he secretly observes her ecology every day, and finally finds a cycle-he must go to the noodle restaurant to eat noodles one day a week. He felt that the time was ripe, so he waited for her at the noodle restaurant for a day. When she walked into the shop and sat down, he took a deep breath, got up his courage and strode forward to ask questions. The young lady opened her eyes and said to him, my name is beef noodles.

animal

Teacher: What are you wearing on your feet? Student: It's leather shoes. Teacher: Where did the leather come from? Student: This is from a cow. Teacher: So, what are the animals that provide you with shoes and meat? Student: It's my father.

Concise and to the point.

My middle school deskmate is famous for her simplicity. One day, there was a group meeting in the class, and it was unbearable. Finally, I asked your opinion. When asked about him, he replied, "I have to pee." . ?

fossil

A geology student was practicing in the field, and a student happened to find a big fossil. Lecturer A said it was a fossil tree, while Lecturer B insisted that it was a dinosaur leg bone. The two sides argued endlessly. The students don't know who is right or wrong, but they know that both lecturers will grade the internship report, so a clever classmate wrote in the report that a dinosaur's wooden leg was found.

antithetical couplet

On the stage, the Chinese teacher explained the couplets. For example, he said, "In the past, a newspaper publicly solicited the bottom line of' Nantong North Tongzhou North Tongzhou Nantong South'. As a result, many letters were submitted, and one sentence was correct, that is, "East Pawnshop, West Pawnshop, East Pawnshop and West Pawnshop". At this moment, a naughty student suddenly cried, "Boys, girls, boys and girls have boys and girls. 」

polygraph

Dad has a polygraph. He asked Dehua, "How was your math today?" Dehua replied:' A' the polygraph rang! Dehua added:' B' machine rang, too! Dehua added:' C' machine is ringing again! Dad was very angry and shouted,' I got an A before! By this time, the polygraph has overturned!

Bird test

It is said that it is the final exam of a certain subject in the department of zoology of a school (as for which subject, it doesn't matter, so don't ask). The old professor was carrying a birdcage covered with black cloth, with only two legs exposed. The topic of the exam is: write down the species of the bird according to the observed legs. A student has been working hard for the exam for several weeks, but as a result, he didn't take any exams, so he won't ... if he is angry, he will strike the table. ! The old professor was very angry. He asked the student to leave his name ... The student only pulled up his trouser legs, revealing his furry legs, and said to the old professor,' Guess who I am! !

calculate

An invigilator is staring at a student throwing dice in surprise. Incredibly ... the student threw the same question several times ... and asked the student why. The students answered helplessly, is it too difficult to check?

professor

"I brought a frog today," the professor of zoology said to the students. "I just caught it from the pond. In this class, we are going to dissect frogs. " He took out a paper box and opened it carefully. There is a ham sandwich in the box. "Strange," the professor was very surprised. "I clearly remember having lunch."

Ridiculously clever

An agricultural college graduate returned to his hometown and saw an old gardener transplanting fruit trees. He said: "Your transplant method is very unscientific. According to your method, I can harvest seven apples from this tree, which is enough to surprise me. " The old gardener looked at him and said slowly, "Not only you, but I am also surprised. Because this is a peach tree. "

call the roll

A newly graduated normal teacher went to a primary school to teach new students. The first thing she did was to ask the students to write their names in the exercise books. After that, she took the exercise books back and sent them back one by one. At the same time, she met students, but there was one. She called ten times and no one came to pick her up ... yellow belly! Yellow belly! ..... What the hell, where has everyone gone! ! ................. finally, after all, the hair is still the rest of the book, so people who have' no one there' raise their hands! ! Then a little girl raised her hand and the teacher asked, "What's your name?" ... Miss Huang Yuepo ...'

punish

An exam in law school:' How to punish bigamy? Answer:' two mother-in-law'

The exam is over.

Wang You didn't do well in the final exam. He sent a telegram to his younger brother to prepare him psychologically. Soon his brother called back and said,' Dad is ready. Now please be prepared.'

Lie down and talk.

One night, a boy's dormitory slept until three o'clock in the morning and suddenly wanted to discuss a question:' What should I say first when I meet a beautiful girl? A gentleman woke up from a dream and said,' Stop talking and let's go to bed! '

cheat

"Polonius was fired for cheating." "What's the matter?" "In the physical examination, he counted his ribs and was found."

composition

When I was a child, my deskmate's Chinese was poor, and writing was particularly difficult. Once, the teacher asked us to write a composition entitled << Look at the clouds >> He was in pain. How can he pass the exam? The first sentence: Today the weather is sunny, the sun shines on the earth, and there are no clouds in Wan Li. Nothing to think about. . . . . The second sentence: White clouds are floating in the sky of Wei Lan. . .

The professor is a kind and humorous old man, and there is a tall and strong PE student in his class. Every time the professor's voice rings in class, the PE students start to sleep until they wake up on time after class. One day, a PE student was born, and the professor kindly said to him, "Jack, please don't be late in the future, it will affect your normal sleep."

rule

One day in math class, as usual, the students are listening carefully and taking notes. Get to the point. The teacher suddenly stressed and said, "This is the rule!" Then the teacher said in a tone of inquiry and rhetorical question, "What is a regulation?" Everyone was at a loss and their eyes widened. The teacher said in an intriguing tone, "The tortoise is the tortoise's ass!" " There was silence. After a while, the teacher suddenly realized, "I'm sorry, I was wrong, I was wrong." It's a noise.

Teacher Tsinghua.

A young teacher in Tsinghua loves mahjong. Once, he played mahjong all night. He has a class at 7:40 the next morning. He got off the mahjong table at 7: 30 and hurried to the classes of four teachers. On this day, the students on duty didn't clean the blackboard. His freshman shouted, "Who is the manager?" The student on duty was afraid to answer, so he had to wipe it himself, but the eraser on the blackboard could not be found. He let out another cry. .....

This is a Chinese class. When talking about new words, the teacher picked up the chalk and wrote a "China" on the blackboard. Then he said, "Students, please look at the whiteboard. There is a red Chinese on it. "

You need a wild boar.

A rural primary school student was late. He explained to the teacher, "I'm going to send a pig to breed this morning." The teacher asked, "Won't your father be like this?" "No, it must be a wild boar."

taste

The Chinese teacher was very angry when he found Zhang San sleeping in class. He woke Zhang San up and asked: How do you sleep in class? However, Zhang San refused to admit to sleeping. Zhang San: I didn't sleep. Teacher: Then why are you closing your eyes? Zhang San: Teacher, I am reading the text silently. The teacher didn't believe me and said, then why do you nod straight? Zhang San: Teacher, you speak very well. The teacher still didn't believe it and said, then why are you drooling? Zhang San: Teacher, your class is very interesting.

Every day has a good turn for the better.

The teacher asked two students, "Did you do good things every day today? The two students said in unison, "Yes! The teacher asked, "What did you do?" Student: We helped an old lady cross the street. Teacher: Well, that's good, but why do you need two people to help an old lady cross the street? Student: Because the old lady doesn't want to cross the road. 」

conclusion

In class, the professor was bored by the students' series of questions and said helplessly, "What?" ? One fool asks more questions than ten wise men can answer. No wonder so many of us failed the exam.

Each has its own explanation.

A student asked the teacher, "What's the difference between hitting someone and being beaten?" . History teacher: Beating people is an aggressor, and being beaten is a victim. English teacher: Being beaten is active, but being beaten is passive. Physics teacher: hitting people is hard, and being beaten is resistance. Dean: Every student has a big demerit.

An absent-minded professor

"Where are my shoes?" When the class was over, the absent-minded professor muttered something to himself. "It's on your foot," said a student. "Oh, yes, it's a good thing you saw it, otherwise I would have gone home barefoot."

One night, the absent-minded professor came home late. When he walked to the door, it suddenly occurred to him that he had forgotten his key. He knocked at the door for a long time before his wife got up and opened the door. Because it was dark, she didn't recognize him, so she explained, "Sorry, sir, the professor is not at home." The professor is absent-minded as usual. He replied, "well, I'll come back tomorrow."

The absent-minded professor was ill and had to be hospitalized. When the doctor came to the door of his ward, the nurse said, "Professor, the doctor is here." The poor professor snorted and said, "Tell him I can't see him now. I am too ill. "

Look forward

Teacher: "when it thunders, lightning and thunder are emitted at the same time." Why do we see lightning first and then hear thunder? " Student: "Because the eyes are in front of the ears."

I see

When the school travels once a year, boys and girls in junior high school always come to play separately because of their different interests. Girls walk around in swimsuits, showing themselves and enjoying the sunshine. The boy rolled up his trouser legs and caught small fish in the water. A teacher who looked after these children lamented, "I don't even remember whether girls were so mature when I was in junior high school." "Sure, but you are busy catching small fish!" Another teacher said drily.

What is Battle of Red Cliffs?

Student: "Teacher, what is Battle of Red Cliffs?" Teacher: "Bare arms are bare arms. Battle of Red Cliffs is naturally a war with bare hands. " ___

At the beginning of each semester, there are always advertisements for selling old textbooks on the bulletin board. One of them reads: "Introduction to Psychology". Fifty yuan. Never used it. Next to the signature, it says, "It must be sold. The next day, a note was added to the advertisement: "The price is reasonable. But you really haven't used it? The signature is "potential buyer". Under the confession, different handwriting reads: "I can promise!" " The signer is the professor who marked his examination paper. ___

In Chinese class, the teacher taught us to be filial, asked our parents to be caring and attentive, and asked them whether the day's work was smooth and whether they were tired. The next day, the teacher asked the students to report their parents' reactions. A classmate said, "My parents said," Tell me how much money you lack! Another student said, "I'm really unlucky!" " My parents asked me, "Did you send out your report card today? 』」___

In the social history discussion class, the professor explained to us how the aesthetic standards of society change with the times. "For example," he said, "Miss America, who was elected in 192 1, is 1.55 meters tall, weighs 49 kilograms, and measures 76 (centimeters), 64, 8 1. What do you think her chances are if she takes part in the beauty contest today? The class was silent for a while, and then a student replied, "Not so good." "Why? "The professor asked him." At least, "he pointed out," she will be too old. 」___

At the university graduation ceremony, there was a project in which graduates crossed a bridge on the lake in groups. I rushed to take photos or videos with my parents, relatives and friends to capture this commemorative lens. At one such graduation ceremony, a photojournalist happened to block the photo position that a parent had chosen at the beginning of the bridge crossing ceremony. "Would you please get out of the way? I spent $30,000 waiting for the opportunity to shoot this shot, "said the parent. ___

My brother is in the fourth grade of primary school. He is so fat that people often make fun of him. One day, the teacher asked one of their classmates to start writing "What do they do to help their families every day" in the contact book. My brother couldn't figure it out, so his mother had to help him fill it out. She wrote in the contact book: "Help the family eat every day. The teacher's comment is: "I can see that you are working hard!" 」___

In the past, when the school held a sports meeting, it was always necessary to read some jingles during the game to enliven the atmosphere. For example, the 100-meter track is not long and the athletes are full of energy. Once, I heard a jingle like this: the javelin is sharp and sharp, hold it in your hand and weigh it. As I flew out, I only saw the curved moon and the blue sky ... _ _ _

call the roll

A newly graduated normal teacher went to a primary school to teach new students. The first thing she did was to ask the students to write their names in the exercise books. After that, she took back her exercise books and sent them back one by one by name in order to get to know the students. But there was one. She called for it ten times, but no one came to get it. Yellow belly! Yellow belly! ... what's wrong Where did everyone go? ! ………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………… ! At this moment, a little girl raised her hand and the teacher asked, what's your name? ... Huang Yuepo, teacher. ___

be intoxicated with self-satisfaction

When I was a freshman, I liked to look in the mirror and feel sorry for myself. Even when the big exam is approaching, I still can't bear to put down the mirror. I was worried about her lessons and tried to persuade her, but she sighed and said, "Isn't beauty a mistake?" "Don't worry," the silent room director said suddenly. "You've never made such a mistake." _ _

Men fight for women.

HKUST has never had a charming mother since ancient times. Who says HKUST doesn't have a charming mother? Fragrant flowers and rotten willows smell fragrant. Are all the seniors in the girls' building wandering? A diploma was half hidden, and I married Wu Dalang without looking at you. You are not as good as Wu Dalang. ___

Three girls in school are talking about a man who came to school to propose. A (junior undergraduate): How tall is he? Is he handsome? B (Master): What does he do and what's his monthly salary? C (Ph.D.): Where is he? ! ! (Pure fiction, please don't mind) _ _

Teacher: Did you do all these homework by yourself? Student: No, my father helped me do it. Teacher: Go back and tell your father to make up lessons on Sunday.

___

quiet

"Now, my children, I want you to be absolutely quiet, so quiet that you can hear a pin drop to the ground." After a while, everything was quiet. A little boy screamed, "Throw the needle!" "

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stay up late or all night on New Year's Eve

At the beginning of the new semester, our senior students went to the station to meet their new classmates. I saw a little girl standing beside a big box at a loss, so I took the initiative to help her lift it. I didn't expect the box to weigh more than 1000 kilograms, so I was embarrassed to put it down and had to struggle to support it. After only a few steps, the girl said to me: If you can't move your back, go away. As soon as I heard this, I cried out my heartfelt anger, put down the box and glared at her. The girl froze for a few seconds, then pointed to the bottom of the box and said, I mean the wheel. ___

telephone number

One day, XRJ called a classmate's home far away from home and told him that XRJ would visit on a certain day in a certain year and ask for directions. The classmate replied, "... call my home after you get off the bus." Get some paper quickly, and I'll tell you my home phone number! ……"___

be late

A student was late for school. The teacher asked, why are you late? Student A: I ate ten thousand! The teacher said: You didn't even eat the food together! ___

translate freely

A university professor told his students: "in ancient times,' Lu' meant kissing, which was very vivid;" One of the students asked, "If' Lu' means kissing, how does' Pin' explain three people kissing together?" The professor was about to get angry when another student stood up and said, "I think the word' product' is easy to explain." What about the' device'? " What are four people and a dog? "The whole class laughed, and the professor closed the book with a bang and left. ___

This young man is promising and worth teaching.

Teacher: "What's your name and why are you making trouble?" Student: "My name is Wang" Teacher: "Be polite to the teacher and be sure to address him as' Mr', you know?" Student: "OK, my name is Mr. Wang." ___

In the chemistry exam of a school, A secretly asked what is the chemical formula of water B? H2O grade A is written in hijklmno__ on the test paper.

Insert it there

One day, during the circuit experiment, the intern teacher asked, "Some pins of capacitors are different in length, while others are different in length.". What's the difference? " ? "A classmate replied," in the bread version. Teacher: "! @#$%^&； *()』

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self-consolation

Heard that:

You may not be able to hand in your homework, write it yourself, meet it, pass it, graduate, find a job, find a wife, have children or live your own life! Why did you hand in your homework? ! Then I won't hand in my homework _ _ _

Step on you ...

A famous botany professor and his teaching assistant in China are studying new varieties of plants. Suddenly, the teaching assistant asked the professor: What should the professor do when he meets an unknown plant in the wild? The professor replied: In order to avoid students asking questions, I usually walk in front, and then I trample all the plants I don't know to death. ___