The longest road I have walked is not someone else’s routine, it is my own path of self-exploration.

In the sharing of "Year of Rebirth Plan - Simplifying Life into Three Keywords", Nali Pao shared her path of self-exploration, from having no sense of self-understanding, to being aware but having no method, to It took about 9 years to explore methods and continue trial and error, and then to verify methods until the system was formed in 2017.

I can’t help but think back on my journey of self-discovery.

I was born in a rural area and went to high school in a small town. Before I went to college in 2004, I had no sense of self-understanding. All I had was the belief of "study hard and live up to the expectations of my parents."

When I finally got into college, I felt like a bird in a cage that finally flew out of the cage and had the opportunity to see the world freely.

Going from a small town to a university in a city I had never been to, my eyes were full of curiosity, and I felt that my world was starting to become different.

Some time ago, everyone posted pictures of themselves when they were 18 years old on their WeChat Moments. I was thinking, "What did I look like when I was 18 years old?" I looked through the electronic photo album, but I couldn't find an 18-year-old photo. photos.

It suddenly occurred to me that I was in my first year of college when I was 18 years old. That year, I officially celebrated my birthday for the first time, ate birthday cake for the first time, and made a wish on a candle seriously and devoutly for the first time. I remember that my sisters in the same dormitory accompanied me to spend time together, and Lao Wu even took a lot of photos and developed them for me. I vaguely remember how I look in the photo - I was chubby and stupid at the age of 18, with nothing but dirt.

But in that soil, where others cannot see, there is a seed that is quietly sprouting. The name of the seed is - "Be Yourself". On that day, I silently told myself: From today on, I turn 18 and I want to live for myself.

To be yourself, you must first understand yourself. At that time, I really had no choice but to use the stupidest method to understand myself.

①Read books:

Go to the library to read books on psychology, books on personality analysis, horoscope analysis, zodiac signs, blood type analysis and the like.

② Go online:

Go online to do Tarot calculations. After doing the calculations, keep the positive and good explanations and ignore the negative and negative results. Haha, now that I think about it, I’m so cute. Therefore, I gave myself a lot of positive hints, such as: You understand your potential. If you fully understand what you want to do, do it with concentration, and use your wisdom, you will create magic! This sentence seems to have been recorded in my diary after I did a Tarot calculation. It has been kept until now, giving me guidance and hints, and has even become my own subconscious words.

③Experience:

When I was in college, I chose to work part-time during the May Day holidays. On the one hand, it is because my family conditions are not good, and I have a younger brother who is in college like me, so I want to reduce the burden on my parents; on the other hand, I feel that working part-time can train myself, get to know myself, and see the world and broaden my horizons.

At that time, I had to interview for a part-time job. During the interview, I had to give a public "speech" to introduce myself in front of dozens or hundreds of people. This kind of opportunity could train myself. If you successfully apply for a job, you will be aware of it at work to see if you are suitable for such a job, whether you are willing to deal with people, whether you are good at interacting with people, and you will also have the opportunity to see the world. I once applied for a part-time job that allowed me to go to Shanghai to participate in the 11th Shanghai Wedding Photography Equipment Exhibition (I have always been forgetful, but I still remember this name, which shows that I was deeply impressed). It was my first time to go to a university. When I went to Shanghai for the first time, I felt happy and excited. The opportunity to see the outside world greatly satisfied my curiosity.

I also joined the Psychological Association in college, but learned nothing except getting a certificate; I was not admitted to the campus radio station for an interview; I went to Qingdao to participate in off-campus English speaking training; I went to Beijing to sit in the Great Hall of the People Participating in Taikang Life’s ten-year celebration... these experiences, looking back now, are the brightest stars of that period.

We need to experience and collect the world in order to better understand ourselves, know ourselves, clarify the direction we want to go, determine what we want to be, and make better choices.

④Others’ evaluations:

From college to graduation, you will also know yourself from other people’s evaluations. When I was in college, I would take the initiative to ask my classmates and friends, "What kind of person do you think I am?". When my classmates looked at my serious look, they would also think carefully about the answer: Perseverance, seriousness, and hard work are what I listen to. The most answers. hehe! Some students said that they work too many part-time jobs because they want to make money.

After graduation, there will be a lot of proactive praise and evaluation based on work performance.

Some are recognition and observations from colleagues, such as: "Your summarizing ability is very strong", "I like to listen to your training for us, it is clear and easy to understand", "Your Mandarin is really standard", "You are really serious about your work" ", "You are a natural coach", "You are so attentive", "You walk so fast and talk so fast", "You are impatient"... Some people will also say "You don't drink or sing. You don’t fit in with others”… There are also comments from superior leaders when scoring quarterly and annual KPIs.

These evaluation information obtained actively and passively were an important channel for me to know myself and understand myself at that time. Seeing yourself from the perspective of others gives you an extra perspective and sometimes makes you more objective.

⑤ Trial and error:

When I was in college, I focused on my studies, and part-time jobs were just experience. After graduation, when I really entered the society and started working, it was no longer experience. When you are still confused and still don’t know what you like, what you can do, what you are good at, and what you value, you cannot do nothing, but you must dare to try and make mistakes.

I have done cosmetics training and am responsible for market development, market maintenance, and training and management of beauty consultants. Later, there was a period of particularly low ebb, coupled with geographical changes, I did telephone sales for half a year, and received conferences for half a year, and then returned to the cosmetics industry as a regional trainer, responsible for a province. Then I resigned due to physical reasons, and the location changed again...

I ran around, experiencing, going through, becoming aware of, and getting to know myself in the journey of life. My mother never understood that I had to run around everywhere instead of taking a stable teaching job after graduation. What was the purpose of it? At that time, I didn’t know “what I wanted.” I only knew that the stability of a teacher in a small town, the kind of life where I could see the end at a glance day after day, was not what I wanted. I didn’t know what I wanted, but at that point I was sure it wasn’t what I wanted.

Uncle Ogawa once said: No matter whether the road ahead is bright or not, you have to go on. Even if you make a mistake, it will only increase the possibility of making the right choice next time.

I think this sentence is a tribute to the person who crosses the river by feeling the stones, is not timid or afraid of the road ahead, keeps moving forward based on feeling, and constantly experiences, experiences, trial and error, and explores himself. It's best to explain.

I worked at my first job after graduation for four years. The biggest gain in these four years was my personal growth. My work habits of making lists, my work habits of making lists and analyzing lists, my advantageous ability to be guided by professors, my first time wearing an evening dress, my first time flying, my first trip to Guilin, Guangxi, Gulangyu Island in Xiamen, Hangzhou and Anhui Going to Nanjing... was the growth and experience that my first job gave me.

I worked the second and third jobs for a year and made a short adjustment.

I have been working at my fourth job for two years. The harmonious team relationship, wonderful team atmosphere, and good income that increases every year are my biggest gains. Until I resigned due to health reasons.

In 2014, my body reported to the police one after another and I had a minor operation. Shortly after I returned to work after the operation, I was diagnosed with lumbar disc herniation. I was treated at home for a month. After I started working, the company conducted a physical examination in September. The result of the physical examination was My immunity is low, I have thyroid nodules... The blows that came one after another made my heart feel cold all of a sudden...

During the month after the lumbar disc herniation, I could hardly take care of myself at home. , lying in bed every day, unable to turn over, unable to cheat, unable to lie on my side, applying medicine every day, stretching every day, eating in bed... At that moment, I was thinking: All my dreams and pursuits are not worth the importance of my body. If I didn’t Without health, I can't even take care of myself, and all the good things I pursue blindly in giving back to my parents will collapse. Without the 1 of physical health, there are really no more 0’s behind it, which is meaningless.

So in November 2014, I resigned. In 2015, I spent a passive gap year recuperating. During this time, my location changed again. As my health improved, I began to plan to return to the workplace.

Every time I change regions and look for a new job, I will be confused for a while. I will consider: what I like, what is suitable for me, what I can do, what I am good at, and what kind of job I like and am good at.

In 2015, I accidentally learned about New Elite on the way to self-exploration. In October, I participated in New Elite’s online course "Building an MVP in the Workplace: Improving Core Competitiveness." This opened the door to acceleration in my self-exploration—I went from self-exploration to career planning, and then participated in a series of courses to learn in depth. I applied what I learned and applied the knowledge I learned about my career to myself, starting a journey of in-depth and systematic self-understanding.

I have been exploring myself consciously and systematically for more than two years from 2015 to now. Each year, I have a clearer understanding of myself.

What do I like? What am I interested in?

What can I do? What abilities do I have? What am I good at? What abilities are there that I am both good at and enjoy using?

What do I value? What values ??do I pursue in my career? What is my pursuit in life? What are my career aspirations? What is my ideal living situation?

Under the guidance of methods, find answers, verify and determine the answers in practice, and clarify the direction you want to go.

Finding direction is the most difficult step. When we have a deeper understanding of ourselves and a clearer direction in which we want to go, the rest is to work hard and use actions to get closer to the ideal.

All the experiences and detours we have gone through have made us understand ourselves better and believe that life is not in vain.

"You can't connect the dots in advance. Only when you look back in the future will you understand how the dots are connected. So you have to believe that what you experience now Things will be more or less connected in the future."

Finally, I would like to share with you this speech given by Steve Jobs at Stanford University.

I hope we have all experienced, been confused, explored, and finally become enlightened. In practice, we will become more and more clear about the direction we want to go, and sail away to the destination of this life.