A letter of guarantee about not taking a mobile phone to school, smoking, drinking and fighting.

Literally, we mean "getting drunk" rather than "drinking".

For most people, "drinking a glass of wine" has long meant a happy time for friends to laugh and laugh. We all have all kinds of memories and expectations (sometimes anxiety) based on the age of each of us and the surrounding environment when we first drank.

It may remind us of cold beer, cocktails, gin and tonic water, whisky and beer, a sip of red wine or something like that.

Over and over again, in the early drinking process of most people, the expectation of alcohol can always meet the actual needs of drinking.

If every time is just right, we will naturally think that "drinking a glass of wine" is a pleasant experience, which not only meets our own needs, but also does not exceed the norms of religious customs. At the same time, it satisfies our desires, caters to the etiquette of social occasions, and helps us relax, cheer up and realize our various pursuit goals. For example, a 55-year-old Finn, when someone asks him for a drink, can't help but immediately think of the warmth brought by drinking a glass or two of brandy or vodka in cold weather when he was young.

If she is a young woman, she may immediately think of a gorgeous crystal cup filled with champagne, fragrant clothes, intimate friendship and romantic atmosphere, or a young man with jeans, beard and long hair at a rock concert, taking out a bottle of booze from a bag full of bottled wine, with flashing lights and smoke, and everyone screaming and screaming, which is exciting. A member of AA said: "Have a drink" is almost synonymous with eating pizza and drinking beer.

Another 78-year-old widow said that when she was in a nursing home, she often couldn't help but think of the habit of drinking a glass of sherry before going to bed. Although this kind of drinking is very natural in our minds, it is misleading in our current situation, and this is also the way some of us start drinking.

If this is the process of drinking, it is unlikely that we will deteriorate into a drinking problem in the future. However, if we look at the process of drinking fearlessly, we will find that no matter how hard we try, there has never been such a perfect and magical moment in our last few years or months of drinking.

On the contrary, we have repeatedly found that our actual drinking amount is far greater than this, which always leads to some kind of trouble in the end. Maybe we just feel a little guilty about drinking too much in private.

But sometimes it will turn into a fierce quarrel, which will affect your work and even lead to serious diseases, accidents, or legal and financial problems. So, when a suggestion of "drinking" appears, now we try to recall the whole process from the beginning of drinking to the last poor drunkenness and hangover.

General friends invite us to drink, which generally refers to the way of entertainment and a cup or two of tasting.

But if we carefully recall all the details of the pain caused by the last drunkenness, we will not be confused by the long-standing impression of "drinking a glass of wine" in our minds.

Now we can frankly admit that in terms of our real physiological reaction, we are quite sure that a cup of yellow soup means that we will get drunk again sooner or later, which will bring a series of troubles.

Drinking no longer means music and joy to us, but memories of illness and regret. A member of Alcoholics Anonymous once said, "I know that if I go to a bar for a drink now, it will never be the same again, just spend a little time and some money."

This drink will exhaust my bank account, my family, my house, my car, my job, my reason and even my life. This is really too big, too expensive and too risky. "

He remembers the last time he got drunk, not the first time he drank.

Hostility, resentment and anger are always related to our drunkenness, which makes our drinking problem more serious.

"Why are you drunk?" A very common answer is that drinking can increase courage, so you can reveal your worries to others and express your anger and dissatisfaction that you usually find it difficult to face. I don't know how to deal with it.

At the same time, drunkenness is often accompanied by anger. Alcoholics may also enjoy a sense of power over others after drinking.

Anger after drinking is highly correlated with violent attacks and murders. Including criminals or victims, a considerable proportion of them had accidents under the influence of alcohol. Rape, family discord and divorce, child abuse and armed robbery are also often caused by promiscuity after drinking.

Even if we don't commit the above-mentioned crimes, our temper and anger will make others feel nervous and worry about violence at any time. Therefore, we must be aware of the hidden risks behind anger.

As far as human nature is concerned, anger is undoubtedly frequent. Violent acts or verbal attacks in anger not only do harm to others, but also endanger the overall public order. Moreover, the accumulation of anger also has a very negative impact on mental health. This hostile attitude towards others will seriously damage our hearts and lead to depression.

Although anger is a common problem in all aspects, it is even more threatening and destructive as far as an alcoholic is concerned.

Almost all sober drunks agree that our own anger often destroys ourselves. Feelings of hostility, resentment, jealousy and anger forced us to want to drink again. So be careful of yourself. There should be other better solutions besides another drink.

First of all, let's identify all kinds of angry faces: intolerance, contempt, contempt, jealousy, hatred, snobbery, ridicule, disgust, hostility, dissatisfaction, tension, irony, ridicule, self-pity, malice, distrust, doubt, anxiety, concern, doubt, suspicion and doubt.

In the past, in the process of drinking, we were either stubborn or overreacted, especially when we started drinking again.

Many of us think that anger is the result of inner fear. We are often not sure what we are afraid of, and sometimes it is just a vague and indescribable panic. We often suddenly get angry with people or things without any foresight.

Failure and frustration are also one of the factors that lead to our anger. As far as typical drunkards are concerned, we especially lack the patience and perseverance to accept the test of failure. No matter the actual situation or the imagined situation, in the face of complicated and thorny difficulties, we habitually choose to drink to solve the problem.

Another kind of righteous anger is even more difficult to deal with-we often think that we are just, chivalrous and cynical, and we should stick to what we do out of justice and fairness. But this mentality gradually eroded our hearts unconsciously and eliminated our resistance to the first glass of wine.

Even if we are really wronged and treated unfairly, anger is still a luxury we can't enjoy. No matter how angry we are, we will end up with the first glass of wine again, thus heading for the road of self-destruction.

When we start to lose our temper, it will help to eat some sweets or drink a sweet drink that is not addictive.

If you can start to divert your attention in time and start to deal with other affairs, it will also have immediate results. Like calling for help or contacting other sober members, you can also pause; Consider whether we are overworked, if so, moderate rest can restore our physical strength and eliminate our anger; Similarly, we can also meditate quietly and meditate on the meaning of the sentence "Let others live as well as ourselves", so as to calm ourselves down slowly, or devote ourselves to other unrelated simple tasks, or even enjoy the music we once liked. ...

We can also sort out the source of anger as: things that we can't change (such as traffic jams, weather, queuing for checkout, etc.). ), let us accept it with a mature and rational attitude, without sulking or indulging in wine.

Sometimes we feel a lot of dissatisfaction with the surrounding environment or our own life. If we are faced with the influence of job-hopping, moving, divorce and other things, then when we need to make a decision, we must be cautious and cautious, and we must not be impulsive and make a helpless decision. In other words, no matter how unfavorable the situation is, we should calm ourselves down first, and then we can have a calm attitude and constructive ideas to deal with those things that bother us.

Another effective way to eliminate anger is virtual substitution. Let's think about it. If a mature, sound and intelligent person is faced with the same situation as us, how will he respond and what kind of action will he take? Try it a few more times and it really works.

In addition, we can also get rid of anger through light physical activities-deep breathing, taking a hot bath, meditation and even shouting, all of which help to relieve emotional tension.

We don't recommend adopting a purely repressive, patient, disguised and closed coping style. We must learn to get rid of anger and still do something. If you can't do this, there is a great risk of drinking again in the future.

take action

The more we want to stay away from alcohol, the more we want to drink. So simply staying away from alcohol (or not thinking about drinking) is not enough.

Once you stop drinking, how do you spend your free time? Most of us have formal work to do, but we still have a lot of free time to kill. Therefore, we must cultivate new hobbies, arrange colorful activities to fill these hours, and at the same time find a suitable outlet for the energy once addicted to alcohol.

There are many meaningful things that are suitable for us to do.

1. When you start abstinence, you can take a walk or take a brisk walk. Especially to new places you've never been before. Go for a leisurely stroll in the park or country road, but it's not a tiring March.

2. read. Although some of us can't settle down to study, we really should read some books, which can broaden our horizons, increase our life experience and concentrate more.

Visiting museums or galleries, some people choose photography is also good.

4. Swimming, running, cycling, yoga or other exercises recommended by doctors.

5. Deal with long-neglected housework. Tidy up the wardrobe, dresser, file documents in different categories, or deal with things that we have put off for a long time. But when we do these things, we should not be greedy and do what we can. Don't clean the whole kitchen or all the files at once, but clean one drawer or one folder at a time and do other work another day.

6. Try to cultivate new hobbies. Choose activities that are not too expensive or demanding, purely entertaining, without competitive pressure and refreshing. Such as singing, writing, tropical fish, carpentry, basketball, cooking, bird watching, amateur performances, wood carving, gardening, guitar, movies, dancing, stone carving, potted plants, collection and so on. Many people find that the activities they really like now are actually hobbies that they never considered trying in the past.

7. regain the fun of the past. A watercolor painting, table tennis or go, reading notes, etc. The one you haven't polished for years, continue these hobbies. But if you think it's no longer suitable for you, give it up.

8. Go to class. Learn Japanese or English? Love history or math? Want to know about archaeology or anthropology? Or cooking, computer operation, and then go to correspondence, TV University or adult education (just interest, not necessarily credit certificate). There are many places where you can take classes only once a week. Why not try it? Taking classes can not only broaden your horizons, but also broaden your life. In case you are tired of the content of the class, don't hesitate to quit immediately and learn to give up activities that are not beneficial to you or have no positive, positive and healthy significance. Let us summon up courage to face it again and have the opportunity to appreciate a new side of life besides drinking.

9. Volunteer to do some useful services. Many hospitals, children's service institutions and social welfare organizations are in great need of volunteers to provide various services. We can have many choices. When we can contribute to others, even if it is only a trivial service, we will find it particularly useful. Even when we talk about the process of participating in these activities and related information, we will feel very interested and particularly involved.

10. As most of us know, there are many ways to get a new hairstyle, wear new clothes, change glasses, or even update teeth, which will have unexpected pleasant effects.

1 1. Relax. Not everything we do in our daily life must be positive and innovative. We also need to do some activities purely for fun, such as kites, zoos, comedy movies, soul music, detective stories and so on. If you don't like them, then find other fun activities that have nothing to do with drinking, just treat yourself.