I couldn't sleep that night.

Yuan Rencong

/kloc-in the autumn of 0/979, I was transferred to Guiyang College to teach. Guiyang No.1 Middle School, about to bid farewell to work 19, stepped onto the university platform. It is my dream to work in the Federation of Literary and Art Circles and become a professional writer. During the period of 1964, the Propaganda Department of Guizhou Provincial Party Committee dispatched literary lovers with certain achievements throughout the province and organized a reportage writing group of 22 people, of whom I was a member. Before that, I had published my works in "Mountain Flowers" and "Shanghai Literature". There is a glimmer of light in the work of the Federation of Literary and Art Circles. I didn't expect to follow the big exercise, and I didn't want to be transferred during the exercise. Before the one-year secondment expired, I returned to my original unit, and my hopes were dashed.

In my mind, this transfer, although far less gratifying than the work of the Federation of Literary and Art Circles, is not for middle school students after all; More importantly, I am not as busy and complicated as working in middle school, so I have time to create. Before class, I met Mr. Wang Yuxing, the head of the Chinese Department of the junior college class, and asked me what class I would take. Without thinking, I replied, "Writing class."

In Guiyang No.1 Middle School, although the environment is relatively relaxed, writing novels is always suspected of "doing nothing" and only dare to write secretly. I went to college, took writing classes, and engaged in literary creation. "Second only to the work of the Federation of Literary and Art Circles", this is my ranking for this transfer.

Counting, from the beginning of publishing to 1979, my Genesis also had 23 spring and autumn periods. However, during this period, I spent 14 years in chaos, let alone writing novels. I really hope I can become illiterate. Such a big repetition, you can usually talk about your own creative "experience", but if you really want to go to the podium, there will be no music at all. At that time, writing teaching was still in its infancy in China, and there were no writing textbooks. A friend encouraged me to say, "Bold, you have creative experience, and what you say will definitely be good for students."

My friend's unintentional words not only encouraged me, but also pointed out the direction for me. "Being good for students" has not only become the guiding ideology of my first class, but also the highest purpose of teaching in the future.

With clear thinking, I entered a tense process of preparing lessons. Roughly speaking, there seems to be a lot to say, but when you sit at your desk and spread out your lesson preparation book, your mind is in a mess and you can't figure it out. At that time, the boss 1 1 year-old, and the second child was 5 years old. My wife took on all the family burdens and let me concentrate on preparing lessons. After 10 days of hard work, I finally got a look and wrote a lesson plan.

Writing lesson plans does not mean preparing lessons; Preparing lessons well does not mean that you can be good; Whether you think you are good or not, and whether the students really benefit, you need to listen to the opinions of the students. I have worked in a middle school for 19 years and have this kind of experience. There is no shortcut, so we can only use the old method: "In and out." Try to understand what you want to say, and connect with writing practice so that students can gain something. I took teacher Run Qingyun's class and began to teach the Classification and Genre of Literary Works. I repeatedly asked why there were only two categories of "poetry" and "prose" (including practical style) in ancient times. As time goes on, the classification becomes more and more detailed, and there are more and more schools? What is external cause and what is internal cause? And classification criteria, etc.

These questions have been wandering in my mind, even falling into a dream. This anxiety and excitement reached its peak on the first night of class. My wife bought a cheap alarm clock the other day in case I overslept. That night, after dinner, I went to bed early. Maybe it's because I'm too nervous, maybe I go to bed too early, my biological clock is out of order, my wife and children are asleep, but I'm not sleepy. For a while, I felt that I didn't think it through somewhere and needed to rethink it; Suddenly inspired, it is time to give an example, or say more; Sometimes I'm afraid the alarm clock will go wrong, and then the bell won't ring. In this way, I get up and turn on the light to write, look at the alarm clock for a while, lie in bed for a while, and force myself to sleep. I don't know how long I stayed in bed before I fell asleep. But before long, the alarm went off. The alarm bell was loud and sharp, and the fatigue caused by lack of sleep suddenly vanished.

19 when I was a teacher, I was so nervous. Because this is a university platform, I am facing college students who want to develop their skills. I can't make mistakes. The spread of fallacies and heresies is my biggest psychological burden.

The school site has just moved from Xiangbaoshan to Mawang Temple. The place is small and the school building is simple. The classroom is on the first floor of a two-story building. But I don't seem to see these. What I see are bright eyes in the classroom. These bright eyes and mature faces roughly stimulate my tense nerves. After the simple process of the teacher entering the classroom, I realized that I had no way out, and the only choice was to grit my teeth and give lectures. Fortunately, the words on my blackboard are passable. After writing the headline "Stylistic Writing", I wrote a subtitle "Classification and Genre of Literary Works" below. At this time, I looked back at the students, and my bright eyes turned into black hair all over the classroom. At the same time, I heard the sound of "Sasha Vujacic" taking notes.

The word is a hammer, and I found the eyes that students trust. This look gave me courage and confidence. I completely calmed down and soon got into shape. I briefly introduce the connotation and development history of "classification" and "genre" of literary works, and then ask the question: What makes the classification of literary works more and more detailed and the genre more and more? Someone is whispering in the classroom. The answer is that I did it. Well-founded, the atmosphere is much more relaxed.

From beginning to end, I have never opened the lesson plan. I know that teaching effect can't be good without lesson plans. I have memorized some definitions. In addition to writing on the blackboard, examples are also explained. After two classes, I was sweating profusely. Two female students followed me when I walked out of the classroom. They are sitting in the front row, which I noticed a long time ago. I thought they had a problem. Stop. A chubby girl said, "Teacher, we like to hear you say this."

Actually, I'm not sure about the effect. Hearing this, it is false to say that I am unhappy. A girl with a small round face next to her said, "Teacher, what you said is very enlightening to us."

Not much to say, but sincere. Usually like to say, what the teacher said impressed the students and benefited a lot, and so on. In fact, for teachers, what students say is not like this. To tell the truth, the words of these two girls gave me the courage and confidence to take a good writing class. Because this is my first time to attend the university platform and take a writing class, its significance goes far beyond the evaluation of these two courses. In class again, I asked their names and wrote them down in my lesson preparation book. The slightly chubby surname is Shi, named Xiaoling, and the small round face is Zhu, named Feng Zhe.

Xu Li, a graduate student of 198 1, is still a famous photographer. Recalling the situation in those years, she said: "At that time, Mr. Shen was our class teacher, and since there was no writing teacher, he took the place. He goes to school very well and we like it very much. Soon I became an old man (I was 42 years old that year), and we had some doubts, fearing that we were not as good as Miss Shen. After several classes, I found that he was very serious and the class was very vivid. Class notes and composition books have been well preserved so far. " I have seen the composition book she kept, and I am very moved. Once, she said that the photos I took lacked artistry and said, "I still clearly remember what you said in class." I asked what it was, and she said, "It's like watching a mountain, and I don't like peace." Yes, I think this sentence is reflected in many photos she took. And the photos I took actually forgot this important artistic principle.

I don't like being a teacher, and my ideological level is not high. But since I became a teacher, I don't want to be careless. What I want most is not to miss my students. Repaying students' trust and support is also an important reason for my efforts. I can't forget that sleepless night, that little round face, that little fat girl, and every affirmation my classmates gave me. Even though I struggled to climb the stairs, I was grateful, or helped me with my bag, which became my motivation for work. Every time a student writes a composition, I happily take home a large pile of books, hoping to see good works from it. Even if there is no eye-catching exercise, something new and a basis for revision, I will put it down. Or talk to the students and I'll revise them; Or I can modify it myself, let students copy it and send it to magazines and newspapers. Most of the works sent by a fan have been published. I made a little effort, and my classmates gave me a particularly generous return. Later, the junior college class was changed to Guiyang Normal College; Later, Zhu Jin University and I merged to form Guiyang University, and I was appointed as an Introduction to Literature and Writing for the 04 Undergraduate Class of the Department of Education. In 2005, the whole class took part in the composition competition for college students learning wine glasses, and 16 students won the prize in our school. Eight students in this class won the first, second and third prizes, accounting for half of the school's winners. From the students' fear of writing to their love for writing, and then to constantly showing me the changes in the exercises, it is gratifying.

All the students I have taught have worked in state organs, local party and government organs, education departments, cultural departments and foreign universities. During Teacher's Day and major festivals, text messages and phone calls are constantly coming. Some people who say hello are not the students I have taught. They just read my book, or they just met. I don't know them. Their greetings are out of respect and love for their teachers. The warmth my classmates gave me was enough for me to enjoy my life. What else do I need?

I think a teacher who teaches writing should be a person with both theoretical literacy and practical ability, and both are indispensable (in fact, a person with a certain cultural literacy should be like this). From 1979 until I left the university platform completely, I spent most of the 28 years studying writing theory, literary theory and works, ethnology, psychology, creativity, preparing lessons and correcting texts. It takes at least 45 minutes or more than an hour to change a sport. I don't want to let go of a typo, a bad word; Affirm the achievements and point out the shortcomings; Some exercises need to be revised In these 20 years, preparing lessons, attending classes and correcting compositions have become the main contents of my life, and I have no time to engage in literary creation, so that my first book, Mountain Man, was published until 1986. Only when you leave the podium completely can you have time to write several novels and works that have been brewing for many years. There are not many research results, but I don't regret it.

Whether it is literary creation, teaching or theoretical research, I have worked hard and have a clear conscience, which is enough. The result is important, but I value the process more, because I get pleasure and realize my own value in this process.

Week of September 8, 2065 438+00