My husband always disagrees with me? Why don't you think this is the fault of thinking?

-disassembling NLP thinking reading notes

Many people will have such confusion. Why can't the leader understand my idea? Why is my husband/wife always against me? Chatting between friends always goes in unexpected directions? Whose problem is this?

A detailed and feasible model of human behavior and communication program.

Why should we learn this mode of thinking? Being familiar with one's own or others' thinking mode can effectively reduce the communication cost, thus understanding the other's thinking and better conveying one's own value and intention. Similarly, people who lack systematic thinking and cognition tend to leave wrong answers when conveying emotions and information, leading to unsatisfactory results.

NPL performance system is mainly divided into four types: vision, hearing, touch and digital vision.

? Visual effects?

The rhythm of speaking: speak quickly and gesture quickly.

Key words: look, look, expect, imagine, understand, disagree.

Judgment of content:

1. Do things according to your hobbies-art, movies, photography, traveling and seeing the scenery?

What is easy to remember is what you see-charts, pictures, pictures, etc?

3, through visual learning-PPT, pictures, videos, flowcharts, etc.

4. like neat and clean things-something, someone's appearance is important?

5. Complain about speed, time and fun; Care about the key points

? Tactile effect?

The rhythm of speaking: the voice is low and slow.

Key words: strive, hold, contact, understand, handle, tell the truth.

Judgment of content:

1, do things according to hobbies-ceramic craft, dancing, sports, walking.

2. Is it easy to remember what you have experienced or the emotions and feelings at that time?

3. Learn from practice-experiential games, extended games, etc?

4. When communicating with people, you will involuntarily be willing to use physical contact?

5. I like being cared about by others. I'm not good at talking. I can't finish a whole sentence at a time?

Auditory effect?

Speech rhythm: the speech is high and low, with a sense of rhythm and pleasant voice.

Key words: listen, listen, say, discuss, say and listen.

Judgment of content:

1, do things according to your hobbies-read aloud, listen to music, make phone calls and listen to nature.

2. Is the information discussed or heard easy to remember?

3. auditory learning-listen to audio materials and listen to explanations?

4. care about the details of things; Pay attention to beautiful words and correct pronunciation.

? Digital auditory effect?

Speaking rhythm: There is no specific rhythm.

Key words: conception, evaluation, evaluation, thinking, understanding, consideration, learning, decision, logical process, changing one's own ideas and finding relevant theories.

Judgment of content:

1, interested in meaningful and logical views.

2. Focus on facts, data and evidence?

3. I want to know the role of some opinions.

Test your NLP representation system online and grasp your thinking system perfectly and accurately through seven questions. Do you want to know what your idea is?

The idea of going to the heap: how to characterize this question? What is its common cause? What is its solution? What can I do next?

The idea of cutting: how did this problem happen? How do I feel? What's the effect on me? What do I think?

Sounds a little confused? Let's lift a chestnut together.

My wife complained to her husband during her physiological period. The husband's first reaction was to "drink more hot water", and the wife felt left out. Why?

In the inherent thinking of men and women, boys tend to "pile up", that is, pay attention to the outcome of things. For him, the physiological period has come, and the solution is to drink more hot water. Girls, on the other hand, are more inclined to "chop" and care more about personal feelings. What she needs is the other side to comfort herself.

Do you understand each other's thoughts in this way of thinking?

I have understood the causes of the other person's thinking, how to reduce the contradictions caused by different thinking? This is where the frame change method is needed.

Frame-changing method: when an event or situation has become a frame, in the communication mode, external events are filtered through a series of ideas and experiences, resulting in different ideas.

Frame transformation methods are mainly divided into meaning frame transformation method and environment frame transformation method.

Environmental framework method: thinking about the same event or behavior in different environments, but more inclined to positive ideas.

Meaning frame switching: When you consider the same behavior, you tend to explain meaning more actively.

In order to better understand and use these two methods, continue to give examples.

A person who lost his legs because of electric shock, how to comfort him so as not to let him lose hope in life?

The answer is not fixed, but according to the frame-changing method, you can completely expand your mind to imagine different ways, so as to understand his needs more thoroughly and give him the greatest comfort from the depths.

Cover map/illustration/picture network

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