The full text of Chekhov's work "The Man in the Condom"

The original text of Chekhov's The Man in the Condom

My colleague Rykov, a Greek teacher, died just two months ago in our city. You must have heard of him. He is really strange. Even on sunny days, he wears rain boots, an umbrella and a warm cotton-padded coat. He always puts his umbrella in a cover and his watch in a gray deerskin cover. Even the pencil sharpener is put in a small box. His face seems to be covered with condoms, too, because he always hides it in an upright collar. He wears black-rimmed glasses, a sweater and cotton in his ears. As soon as he gets into the carriage, he always asks the coachman to pull up the hood. In a word, this man always wants to wrap himself in a shell, as if to make a condom for himself, so that he can be isolated from the world and not affected by the outside world. Real life stimulates him and scares him, which always makes him fidgety. Perhaps to defend his timidity and hatred of reality, he always praises things that have never existed in the past; In fact, the ancient language he taught, for him, was rain boots and umbrellas, which made him escape from real life. Did Rykov try to hide his thoughts in a condom? Only when the government's notice and newspaper articles stipulate what is forbidden can he feel clearly. Seeing a notice forbidding middle school students from going to the streets after 9 pm, he felt very clear and understood: this kind of thing is forbidden, well, that's it. However, he feels that official approval or acquiescence always contains suspicious elements and vague elements that are not fully spoken. Whenever a drama club, reading room or teahouse is opened in the city with the approval of the authorities, he always shakes his head and whispers, "Sure, but don't make trouble." Anything that violates laws, regulations and rules, although seemingly irrelevant to him, makes him unhappy. If one of his colleagues is late for church prayer, or hears rumors that middle school students are making trouble, he is always in a panic and keeps saying, don't make trouble. At the academic meeting, his caution, doubt and pure condom-like arguments simply overwhelmed us. He said that young people, both male and female, are restless and noisy in the classroom-alas, I just hope that this kind of thing will not reach the ears of the authorities, and that nothing will happen. He thinks it is appropriate to expel Petrov in the second grade and yegorov in the fourth grade. Guess what? He sighed, wore glasses on his pale face, and surrendered to us. We had to give in, lower the moral scores of Petrov and yegorov, lock them up, and then fire them. Our teachers are all afraid of him. Believe it or not. Our teacher is a thoughtful and decent person, trained by Turgenev and Shedelin, but this little guy who always wears rain boots and an umbrella has ruled the whole middle school for fifteen years! But what is Duzhi Middle School? The whole city is under his rule! Our wives here will not hold a family drama party until Saturday, because they are afraid that he will see it; Priests dare not eat meat or play cards in front of him. Under the influence of people like Rykov, the whole city lived in fear for ten to fifteen years, fearing everything. They dare not speak loudly, dare not write letters, dare not make friends, dare not study, dare not give alms to the poor, dare not teach people to read and write ... Didn't Rykov live in a house with me? His bedroom is quite small, like a box, with curtains hanging on the bed. As soon as he went to bed, he put the quilt over his head. The room was hot and stuffy, the wind pushed the closed door, the stove buzzed, and there was a sigh in the kitchen-an ominous sigh ... He was lying under the quilt, shivering, afraid of what would happen, afraid that thieves would sneak in. He had nightmares all night. When we went to school together in the morning, he was listless and pale. The crowded school he went to obviously filled him with fear and hatred; Walking side by side with me is obviously a torment for such a lonely person. However, the man wearing a condom almost got married. A new history and geography teacher, a native Ukrainian named Mikhail Savage kovalenko, has been sent to our school. He came with his sister Valenka. Later, due to the best efforts of the principal's wife, Hua Lian Ka began to clearly show her feelings for our dear Rykov. In love, especially in marriage, encouragement always plays a great role. Everyone-his colleagues and their wives-began to lobby Don Rykov to get married. Besides, Hualien cards are not ugly and attractive. She is the daughter of a fifth-class civil servant and has land and real estate; Most importantly, she was the first woman to treat him sincerely and affectionately. So he lost his mind and decided to get married. But Valenka's younger brother hated Bobby Rykov from the day after he met him. Now, listen to what happened next. A narrow-minded ghost drew a cartoon showing Rykov walking with an umbrella, rain boots and trouser legs rolled up, holding Hualianka in his arms. There is an inscription below: "apes in love." You know, those eyes are very similar. That painter must have painted for more than one night, because the teachers in the boys' school and the girls' school, the teachers in the gods' school and the immortals in the yamen all received a copy. No, Rykov has one, too. This cartoon made him extremely embarrassed. We walked out of the dormitory together; It was Sunday, May 1 day. Students and teachers agreed to meet at school in advance, and then went to a small forest in the suburbs together. We were taken aback, and his face turned blue, darker than the dark clouds. "There are such vicious bad people in the world!" He said, his lips trembling. I even sympathize with him. Let's go. Let's go. Suddenly, Ke Varenko came by bike. Behind him, Hua Lianka came by bike, flushed and exhausted, but happy and in high spirits. "Let's go first!" She cried. "What fine weather! How cute, so cute! " They walked away and disappeared. Don't Rykov's face turned from blue to white. He stopped and looked at me. ..... "What's going on? Or maybe my eyes deceived me? Is it wrong for middle school teachers and young ladies to ride bicycles? " "What's wrong with that?" I asked, "Let them ride bicycles and have fun." "But how is that possible?" He cried and was surprised to see me calm. "What are you talking about?" He seemed very confused, refused to go any further and went home. The next day he always rubbed his hands and trembled uneasily; It is obvious from his face that he is ill. He left before school, which was the first time in his life. He didn't have lunch. In the evening, he put on warm clothes and went to Ke Varenko's home. When Valenka was not at home, she only met her brother. "Please sit down!" Ke Varenko said coldly with a frown. Don't Rykov sit in silence for about ten minutes, and then he said, "I came to you to dispel one of my worries. I am very distressed, very distressed. A malicious guy drew an absurd cartoon about me and another person who is close to you and me. I think it's my duty to assure you that I have nothing to do with it. ..... I didn't do anything to deserve such ridicule-on the contrary, my behavior has always been a gentleman in all aspects. " Ke Varenko sat there sulking and saying nothing. Without waiting for a moment, Rykov lowered his voice and said in a sad voice, "Besides, I have something to talk to you. I have worked here for many years, and you just came recently; Since I am a colleague older than you, I think I have an obligation to give you a piece of advice. Your pastime of cycling is definitely not suitable for young educators! " "What do you think?" Ke Varenko asked. "Don't this still use to explain, mihajlovic, savage? Isn't this a matter of course? If teachers ride bicycles, what good things can they expect students to do? All they can do is turn around and walk with their heads! Since the government has not issued a notice to allow such a thing, it can't be done. I was scared yesterday! My eyes turned black as soon as I saw your sister. A young lady, or a girl, riding a bike-it's terrible! " "What do you want?" "I only have one thing to do, and that is to advise you, Mikhail Savage. You are a young man, and you have a great future. You must be very, very careful about your actions. You are so so so so, alas, so so! When you go out in an embroidered shirt, people often see you walking around the street with a book; Now, what bike do you ride? The headmaster will hear that you and your sister are riding bicycles, and then this will spread to the ears of the inspector ... will this have a good end? " "When it comes to riding a bike with my sister, it's nobody else's business." Ke Varenko blushed and said, "Whoever cares about my private affairs, just tell him to get out!" Rykov looks pale and stands up. "I can't go on talking to me in this tone." He said, "I beg you, don't talk like that when you talk about your boss in front of me;" You should respect your boss. " "Did I say anything bad to my boss? "Ke Varenko looked at him angrily and asked." Please avoid me. I am an aboveboard person and don't want to talk to a gentleman like you. I don't like people who make irresponsible remarks behind their backs. " Rykov took his time and put on his coat in a hurry, with a frightened expression on his face. This is the first time in his life that he has heard such unkind words from others. "Whatever you say is up to you. "When he walked out of the door and went to the stairs, he said," It's just that I have to tell you in advance: maybe someone overheard our conversation. In order to avoid our conversation being misunderstood and causing any trouble, I must report our conversation to the headmaster-explain the main idea. I can't help it ""report him? Go ahead, just report it! " Ke Varenko grabbed him by the collar behind him and gave him a hard push. Rykov walked down the stairs heavily in rain boots. The stairs were high and steep, but he rolled down the stairs unharmed. He stood up and felt his nose to see if his glasses were broken. However, when he rolled downstairs, it happened that Hua Lian Card came back with two ladies. They stood downstairs, stunned. This is more terrible than anything in Rykov. I believe he would rather break his neck and leg than be teased by others. Yes, in this way, the whole city will know about it, and it will also reach the ears of the principal and the inspector. Oh, there may be trouble! Maybe there will be another cartoon, and finally he will be ordered to retire ... Only when he stands up will Hualian Card recognize him. She looked at his funny face, wrinkled coat and rain boots. She doesn't understand what happened. She thought he fell down by accident, so she couldn't help laughing. Laughter resounded through the room: "Ha ha ha! This loud and clear "hahaha" ended everything: the expected marriage and human life in Rykov. He didn't hear what Valenka said or see anything. As soon as he got home, the first thing he did was to take the photo of Hua Lianka off the table. Then he went to bed and never got up. A month later, don't Rykov died. We all went to the funeral. Let's be honest: it's a great pleasure to bury people like Rykov. When we came back from the cemetery, we showed a sad and humble face; No one will show a happy mood. That feeling, when we were children a long time ago, when adults were not at home, we went to the garden to play for an hour or two and enjoyed complete freedom. We are happy to go home from the cemetery. However, it hasn't been a week, and life has returned to the old, as depressing, boring and messy as before. Things are not much better. In fact, although we buried Bie Rykov, there are still many such people wearing condoms. I don't know how many there will be in the future!