Embarrassing funny jokes on campus

When I was a freshman in law class, our law teacher had a habit of asking questions and would repeat the questions loudly before asking. Once when I was taking "General Principles of Civil Law", the teacher suddenly raised his voice and started asking questions. All the students stared at the teacher in fear, fearing that they would be called. Because the teacher asked questions instead of calling the roll call, he looked at the roll call to ask the question, so everyone No need to lower your head.

"Class 1, No. 25!" the teacher ordered.

There was silence (I was in a daze)...

"No. 25 - Zhang X! Is he here?" the teacher repeated, brush! The whole classroom looked at me.

"Not coming!" I shouted. The whole class was stunned! But soon I began to admire my courage again.

"Why didn't you come?" the teacher asked again.

"He is sick!" I had no choice but to lie, and the whole class burst into laughter.

"Are you from his dormitory?" The teacher was also confused by the inexplicable laughter.

"Yes." Faced with the teacher's cross-examination, my face turned green.

"That's outrageous. Go back and tell him to come to the office to find me in the afternoon!" The whole class laughed again.

"Ah?! Okay." My scalp is starting to feel numb. Who can I ask to take the scolding for me this afternoon? Just Li X. Alas, I have to treat that kid to a meal again.

I was congratulating myself for escaping a question, and the teacher added: "Can you answer this question for him?"

"Ah!?" I reluctantly said Standing up, you can imagine how depressed you were. There were already people in the classroom whose stomach hurt from laughing.

"Teacher, can you repeat the question you asked?"

"Ah! I have repeated this question three times. How did you attend class?"

"Sorry, I didn't hear you clearly!" There were beads of sweat on my forehead.

"Well, let me repeat it again..."

"I, tell the teacher, I don't know how to answer this question." I thought it was death anyway, why die so cowardly? , so I felt confident.

"Okay, come to my office with Zhang X at 2:00 pm!" All the students laughed until their blood flowed.

"Cool" is popular on campus. A boy came back from the hair salon "pretending to be cool", and all the girls exclaimed in unison: "Here comes the cool guy!" The boy was flattered and said: "No, it's just a 'cool haircut'." The head teacher happened to pass by and said seriously : "You have to hand it over to the public even if you pick up a piece of trousers."

A certain classmate claimed to have learned a few words in English and often liked to show off in front of others. One day, his classmates deliberately used English to make fun of him. In anger, he actually spit out "give you some color see see."

A university professor said to his students: "In ancient times, 'Lu' was The meaning of kissing is mouth-to-mouth, very vivid. "One of the students asked: "If 'LV' means kissing, how do you explain the word 'pin'? Are three people kissing together?" The professor was about to get angry when another classmate stood up and said, "I think the word 'pin' is easy to explain, but what about the word 'qi'? What are four people and a dog doing?" The whole class burst into laughter, and the professor threw the book away. .

A Ming had a crush on a female classmate and decided to write to her anonymously first. Friend: "Then how did she react?" A Ming: "Very excited." Friend: "That's great!! Then what?" A Ming: "Then she called the police."

One day During swimming class, the teacher said, "Whoever doesn't go into the water, I'll cross out his name on the roll call." Student: I'm afraid that if I get into trouble, my name will be crossed out from my family's household register

There was an exam when we were in high school. A boy sat in the last group and received an answer from a classmate. , I was so excited that I immediately unfolded it. Just when I was about to make a large number of special copies, I looked up and saw the invigilator walking towards him with a smile. He had obviously seen it. What this man did later became a classic for our whole grade:

He straightened up very calmly, looked directly at the teacher, then put the answer sheet on his nose and blew it hard, and then threw a parabola in a cool and unrestrained manner - until the teacher in the garbage basket behind the entrance stared at him several times, and finally lost the courage Pick up the incriminating evidence.

Once I went to a self-study class and saw an acquaintance in the classroom. I sat there and talked to them, and they chatted with me while doing questions. Later, I found that the atmosphere was not right. When I asked, I found out that they were taking exams. I asked the teacher where? She said that the teacher came out in the last row to look at the watch, and it was 20 minutes.

When I took the college physics exam, I turned in the paper myself. I looked at a brother's fill-in-the-blank question and changed the answer on the blackboard. , the teacher came over and asked, I said my name was written wrong, and I looked at the test results... 6 1

During a political exam in high school, a boy in the last row spread his textbook on his lap and wrote hard. Unexpectedly, The invigilator walked around behind him as silently as a wild horse and caressed his shoulder. The student was shocked and said without changing his expression: "I'm sorry, there are too many things in the table, so I have to let it stay on my lap." Then he lowered his head and continued writing quickly. The whole class.

When high school students copy books and find that there are ambiguities in the questions, they take the textbooks and discuss them with the teacher.

It took the teacher 3 minutes to react and he sighed.

When I was in junior high school, the female classmate next door threw her book on the ground during a biology exam and used her toes to flip through the book and copy it. I always pf her eyesight and Toe flexibility.

When we were in our junior year, we had an elective subject - macroeconomic control, but I basically never took it. Later, during the exam, the whole class cried and begged the teacher to open a book exam (the last class was quite popular), and the teacher was kind-hearted and agreed. On the second day of the exam, everyone discovered that the book was gone (it had been lent to other departments, they were required to take it). Later, the whole class only collected a dozen books. During the exam, four people used one copy to copy wildly, and they didn’t even have it. Stopped chirping. The teacher who invigilated the exam and his wife (who was also a teacher in our department) couldn’t stand it anymore. The two of them stood on the podium and burst into laughter. They said to us: You don’t know how to do it, so I’ll give you a book to copy. Go ahead and study, you don’t even know where to copy..."

In addition, this teacher only has one arm, and he is the most knowledgeable teacher in our department and even the whole college, and the best teacher in lectures. He writes on the blackboard Very beautiful. We all call him - Yang Daxia (alluding to Yang Guo). His wife is also very nice, we call her Little Dragon Girl, but she looks really good...

The girl wrote the word on her thigh. , the male teacher who was in charge of the exam saw her and told her to stand up, but he didn’t dare to ask her to turn up her skirt. As a result, the girl got the first place in the exam.

In the past, foreign teachers were allowed to bring dictionaries in. People bring electronic dictionaries or PDAs, and the content is entered first. The most exaggerated thing is that there are so many things in one category, and a few girls only enter part of it, and then transmit it wirelessly during the exam...

I have a classmate who took the English test in college. He bought a box of embroidery needles and engraved the test content mentioned by the teacher on his desk in advance (our desk is a shiny hard board). You can't see it, you can only see it by looking sideways. He carved it all afternoon and blunted N needles. In the end, his hands were numb, and then he threw a book to occupy a seat on the table. That desk will be the one that the juniors and juniors will compete for in the future.

The most profitable thing for me was that I didn’t prepare anything, I thought I was going to die! I already prepared the repair fee! I was sitting in a daze in the exam room! Then the invigilator asked everyone to change seats and I sat down in the new seat! Hahahahahaha! All the answers were copied on the table! Suddenly, I found a brother staring at me with blazing eyes! Hahahaha, I passed the class successfully!

I once dreamed that I was taking an exam, which scared me. I came over and found that I was indeed taking an exam!

During the last exam, the guy in front of me took out a piece of paper and drew lots. The teacher came over and asked him what he was doing. ”

A certain expert slept all the time during the exam, and then woke up when the exam was about to end. He looked around and found that the classmates behind him had finished the paper and had not yet written their names. So he took it over and wrote his name and handed it in. .