Depression and photography

In the summer of 20 19, I was lovelorn, my mother died, and I was delayed ... a series of beatings and attempted suicide. When I was sent to the hospital, I was diagnosed with severe depression and started a long treatment!

That winter was spent in the north, and there was still a faint sunset glow over the distant mountains. The outline of the scenery seen through the window glass has retreated to the distance, but it has faded ... The stars, bright spots and ruts of the galaxy are clearly left in the snow, and under the starlight, they are accidentally dragged far away, even the fingers are beautiful colors! Looking up at the starry sky in the snow, I bowed my head and wrote familiar names over and over again ... At that time, I took medicine every day, lived without sadness or joy, repeatedly denied myself, lost depression, and even said nothing.

I traveled around many corners of Qinhuangdao with my camera, and saw the possibilities of life and the tenderness brought by the change of light and shadow. Later, after coming out of depression, I even missed the state of that time, being lonely and focused, and doing one thing with all my heart. The result is always good. So the depression improved at the end of the year, and I received the warmth and encouragement from strangers, just like a release.

It may be incredible that a southern girl falls in love with the north, but it is true. I fell in love with the north, lit a match in winter, and wrote the name of the person I like over and over again in the snow ... I like staring at the sky in a daze on snowy nights ... I like loneliness, but I am afraid of loneliness ... Then I went to many places and saw the spring in Qinghai, patches of cattle, sheep and rape flowers, summer in Hulunbeier and endless grasslands. Trees are all autumn, and mountains are only dusk. Harbin in winter is all white ... Loess Plateau, North China Plain, Sichuan Basin, Shandong Hill ... These places I have seen on the map of junior high school, when measured with my feet, are near or far, like a dream ... Haruki Murakami once said, you should remember those who silently hold you and accompany you in the dark. It is these people who make up the warmth in your life, keep you away from the haze and make you a kind person!

So thank the people who like and accompany me, thank you in front of the screen, thank you for listening to my thoughts …