Short and funny copy selection

1. In this fickle age, the best way to make others remember you is to owe money and not pay it back.

I finally found someone, but his family doesn't seem to like me very much, especially his wife.

Do you know why you are single? Because you are ugly, you also dislike others' ugliness!

Instead of asking questions like this, it is better to give me a huge sum of money to make me feel the warmth of human feelings.

Five. Three fantasies in life: lose weight tomorrow; Go to bed early today; I'll chop my hand if I buy it again.

6. Scientific research has proved that people who smoke and drink all the year round have a lower probability of developing Alzheimer's disease, because the probability of early death is higher.

7. Life is to spend the first half of your life in the report card and the second half in the bill.

Eight. When I have money, I will buy a bucket of instant noodles, eat noodle soup instead of drinking it, and pour it directly.

9. My son came home trembling: "Dad, I only got 60 points in the exam today". Dad is very angry: "Don't call me dad next time you fail the exam!" " "The next day, my son came back:" I'm sorry, brother! " "

1 "Where is the most beautiful girl in China?" "Friends circle!"

1 1. The collapse of young people begins with employment, the collapse of middle-aged people begins with borrowing money, and the collapse of old people begins with learning not to square dance.

Twelve. When I was in high school, I had a youthful and beautiful acne on my face. One day, I took the bus, holding my hand and shaking with the car. A child tugged at my skirt: "Brother! Brother! You spilled eight-treasure porridge on your face! "

13. What is the power of mathematics? I can't understand the answer after copying! What is the power of Chinese? I don't want to copy after reading the answer!

Fourteen. When I am rich, I will buy two lollipops, one for you to eat and the other for you to eat.

15. When I speak impulsively, please don't misunderstand that I am rude. On the contrary, my good upbringing and law-abiding social responsibility prevented me from hitting you directly.

Sixteen years old. The ending, which is different from what you think, is called life, and what you think is called fairy tale.

17. What should I do if I don't have children and get old and sick in the future? What? This kid is my future drug detonator?

18. Be sure to remember those who chat with you late into the night. It is because of them that you stay up late, resulting in dark circles and poor skin.

19. If you treat women as clothes, you will run naked sooner or later. You should eat enough and go to bed early. Don't stay up because you are ugly!

Twenty one. Girls would rather be Gao Shuai's spare tire than accept diaosi's behavior, which ensures the progress of human beings genetically.

22. Why do some people ask for dozens of things when looking for someone? My mate selection criteria are three words: please.

Twenty-three I always feel that I didn't play well after quarreling with others. I always feel that organizing the language and quarreling again will win me.

24. Slag students share their experiences with me as soon as they meet at school. They said: I didn't do my homework in the summer vacation, but I was very happy throughout the holiday. It's worth it!