Recommended reading: It is an ability to use a circle of friends calmly.

My colleague Xiaoqu told me that she declined the blind date because she talked about her friends' attitude.

After the first meeting, the blind date man enthusiastically pursued a ditty. Once, the two of them took a walk, talking from life and work to a circle of friends, and the blind date man paddled his mobile phone to introduce the ecology of his circle of friends.

This is Xiao A, a college roommate. Look at the travel photos of his trip to Taiwan Province this time and his last trip to Japan. Here's the local location. Why didn't he locate himself when he returned to his hometown in Anshan?

This is Xiao B, a colleague of the rich second generation. Do you think this pose she sent this morning is to show off the steering wheel of the new car her father bought, or to show off the watch in her hand?

the blind date man said, I really want to reply to them:? Those who pretend to be forced, although far away, will be punished? .

Seeing Xiaoqu amused by his words, the blind date man commented more vigorously. I feel upset when I see my mother sunbathing, I feel uncomfortable when I see a beautiful woman taking a selfie, I feel uncomfortable when I see an advertisement in Wechat business, I feel cheat people, and I feel uncomfortable when I see a couple showing love?

blind date men sometimes envy and hate, sometimes hate iron not turning into steel, and sometimes they play with horses in their hearts, and Xiaoqu ends the date for an excuse. When they get home, they contact blind date men and feel that they are not suitable.

I don't quite understand why Xiaoqu refused the other party. Xiaoqu told me that she wanted to find a mature and wise man, and the attitude of the blind date man in using a circle of friends showed that his mind was immature.

First, his ideas are relatively negative and extreme. He thinks that people who are very loaded in the circle of friends may be simply recording their walking tracks. Maybe famous brands are the daily life of others. What he lacks, the more he feels that others are showing off;

Second, I think he doesn't understand speculation and tolerance. Life is richer than a diamond slice, but he only takes screenshots from a few friends, labels and defines others narrowly, holds a dualistic evaluation system for complex human nature, and has a low acceptance of others' different lifestyles.

It is more important to look at a person's maturity than what he sends, and look at his mentality when he inputs and outputs in the circle of friends.

and a mature person will use the circle of friends calmly.

2.

The circle of friends was opened in 212, five years ago.

I asked a reader a few days ago, what is the difference in mentality between just using a circle of friends and now using a circle of friends?

She replied: I used to take my circle of friends too seriously.

when sending a circle of friends, type and delete, delete and type, type and delete, and delete and type again. The content can't be melodramatic, and I don't want others to guess my situation, but I hope someone can understand the deep meaning behind it, and delete it immediately after it is sent.

after sending it, keep it in fear? Found it? The red circle is surprised and happy, and it is simply to implement likes and comments as KPIs.

Later, I gradually got over it, and my work performance was there, so the leaders wouldn't think I was too idle, my sincere friends would understand me, and those who didn't like me didn't insist, and I couldn't stop others from blocking me.

There are not so many inner feelings in the circle of friends now, and there is a kind of casualness that you can send whatever you want and love whoever you want.

Many people's growth is reflected in their attitude towards their friends.

how many times do you circle of friends? Unload-open-unload-open again? A friend of mine, in order to make himself more self-disciplined, unloaded his circle of friends, but still didn't live a good life.

Later, he learned from a painful experience. If he is a person who has no self-discipline, time management and can't get along well with himself, it is only a superficial problem to use a circle of friends.

When my shy cousin just started working after graduation, in order to talk to her colleagues, she often looked through her colleagues' circle of friends to find out the trends of her colleagues after work or on weekends, and became the second praise king in the circle of friends.

then she understood? Adding a circle of friends does not necessarily mean that you can join a circle? With her rapid independence, she forged a deep friendship with her colleagues.

She is becoming more and more supercilious to her circle of friends and interpersonal relationships.

3.

I found that the more mature and advanced people are, the more indifferent and uneventful they look at their circle of friends. It is embodied in the following three aspects:

1) Being able to understand and tolerate the jagged polymorphism in the circle of friends.

some popular articles say that your circle of friends thinks you are pretentious, that there are no friends in the circle of friends, that those who are too clean in the circle of friends have deep routines, and that that person in the circle of friends is not you?

But these are only used to expand the perspective of looking at the circle of friends, rather than definitive conclusions. Every statement can find a lot of counterexamples in life.

Some people love to make a living, some people love to send poems and distant places, some people have a terrible day and send a photo of themselves to encourage their morale, some people send that melodramatic quotation specially for people they care about, and some people live a different `self' online than offline.

One moment can't represent a person's vast life, so there is no need to label people in the circle of friends.

Russell said? It should be noted that polymorphism is the source of happiness? As long as it doesn't infringe on the rights of others, the lifestyle in others' circle of friends is worthy of respect.

2). Record your life with a circle of friends, but don't? Record? Greater than? Life? .

once I was waiting in line to eat in a restaurant, and I was sitting next to a couple who had been to the anniversary. They were all dressed up and were full of love stories.

after serving, the husband gave gifts, and the wife took out her mobile phone, photographed her husband, environment, dishes and gifts and sent them to a circle of friends, which became the rest of the romantic atmosphere.

My wife didn't forget to check the comments while holding a glass, and reported the situation of friends circle to her husband in real time. Someone praised us and asked which restaurant this was.

My husband later asked her unhappily if she could put down her cell phone and have a good meal. I could feel the atmosphere turn stiff sitting next to her.

Zhang Ailing once said that photos are just the broken shells of life. Years have passed, and melon seeds have been swallowed one by one, and they know it well, leaving only the messy black and white melon seeds for everyone to see.

My wife originally intended to record and share this wonderful moment, but she ignored the feelings of people around her and the quality of this moment.

I'm most afraid of treating small favors in my circle of friends as great kindness, but taking those around me who are dead set on being nice to you for granted.

3). I am so rich that I don't need to find a sense of existence and superiority in my circle of friends.

With the increasingly exciting life, my attitude towards my circle of friends is more clear and open.

Sometimes if you are busy, you forget to look at your circle of friends. When you are idle, you can brush it casually. You can read more interesting content or useful and interesting information, and then you can quickly skim it without interest.

regularly click on the homepage of the person you care about, carefully look at each circle of friends, see that friends are well and infected with happiness, and feel that friends are not in the right state, so they specially open small windows or talk privately on the phone.

other people live well in the circle of friends, and I don't need to find evidence to convince myself that it's actually better. It's hard for me to interpret the circle of friends from a small perspective.

Mao Mu said,? We should tolerate others as we tolerate ourselves? . What is more sad than seeing the existence in my circle of friends that I can't get used to is that it is more difficult for me to accept that I can't accept these unfavorably.

because I put myself in others' shoes, I care about my heart, from being surprised at first sight to being neither humble nor supercilious, from finding fault with others to being inclusive, so generous that I don't need to innuendo, so confident that I don't need to deliberately fit in with others. This is my ideal state of treating friends.