What’s stopping us from living the life we ??want

What prevents us from living the life we ??want?

What prevents us from living the life we ??want? Many people spend their lives doing nothing, but still I am lamenting that what I am pursuing is an ordinary life. In fact, everyone deserves to live the life they want. What is it that prevents us from living the life we ??want? What's your answer? ?What prevents us from living the life we ??want1

Generally speaking, parents, guardians, teachers and society all have a huge influence on the way we live our lives.

This is why people who travel to other countries often experience the feeling of "culture shock". Different rules, customs and attitudes can quickly lead to a feeling of confusion and alienation.

You may have experienced this yourself.

However, "culture shock" does show how conditioned we are by our own local customs and culture. This is something you may not have considered before. However, I urge you to push past this limit.

You may be living the life your parents, teachers, and society want you to live, rather than the life you want.

So, are you ready to get out of this state?

If so, then I will share with you five strategies to help you escape from your own mental prison.

Let’s take a look…

The benefits of a confident attitude

Generosity and humility are both great qualities – however, humility actually will prevent you from achieving your goals.

If you’re working behind the scenes on a team, it’s easy for your work to go unnoticed. This means you may not get the credit you deserve.

It is a sad fact of life that if your efforts are not recognized, you will be forgotten when the opportunity comes.

So, if you often play the role of "I'm not good enough at anything" - then please stop now!

Starting now, if you can change your attitude about your abilities, focus on your strengths, and improve (or delegate) your weaknesses, you will greatly increase your confidence and in turn will This power translates into motivation to achieve your goals.

So, be sure to talk about your achievements. I promise, your confident attitude will work wonders for you!

Say goodbye to limitations

Do you often feel that you are not smart enough or self-disciplined enough? What about time management? Do you often feel like you don't get enough sleep?

I have felt this way before.

Fortunately, over the years I have been able to discover and apply some dynamic techniques to my life that have allowed me to push beyond my limitations.

Positive self-talk is one example. This is a simple but powerful tool that can help you break out of habitual thought patterns.

What is self-talk?

It’s what you say to yourself externally and internally every day.

You may say to yourself over and over: "I'm not good enough at this." But what you don’t know is that this attitude will creep into your thinking—making you really less than good.

Just as negative thoughts lead to negative outcomes, positive thoughts lead to positive outcomes. Use the example above, but change the wording to "I'm great at this" and watch how your positive self-talk boosts your self-confidence and gives you the strength and courage to say goodbye to your limitations.

You can also try some tried-and-tested methods to boost your self-confidence. For example: finding time to learn new things, setting goals and managing time effectively.

Are you afraid of change?

You really want to make a big change in your career, but you are afraid that it will end in failure.

You really want to ask that special someone out, but you’re afraid they’ll say no.

You really want to move to the beach, but you are afraid of leaving the environment you are accustomed to.

Does this sound familiar?

I think so, because fear of change is the most common reason that stops people from reaching their potential and doing what they want to do.

The secret to overcoming the fear of change is to understand that if we want our lives to change for the better – we need to make changes in our lives. Because without change, nothing will change. It's that simple.

In fact, fear of change is actually fear of the unknown. We tend to think that the unknown is scary. However, this doesn't have to be the case.

Again, this comes down to our attitude and perspective. If we approach the unknown with excited anticipation, we no longer fear it. The negative power it had over us will also disappear.

With this simple mindset shift, you can leave fear behind and begin a life that embraces and welcomes change and opportunity; a life of true freedom.

Draw a picture in your mind

Did you know that most of us think in pictures? That's right. When we can speak and write with words, our brains turn these things into pictures.

Just think back to some of your most important memories (perhaps your first kiss, your graduation day, or the birth of your first child). Do you think of words and sentences? Probably not. Instead, you can instantly flash back images of events in your mind. Not only still images, but also moving images equivalent to videos.

Once you understand that your brain works through pictures, the key to changing your thoughts—and your life—is to change how you think about the future.

For example, if you always imagine yourself being stuck in a job, well... you'll probably end up being stuck! But if you make a concerted effort, persevere, and imagine yourself in a new, exciting role—then your outcome will be different.

You may know this technique as "visualization." And, along with the other tips I share with you in this article, it’s a powerful piece of the success puzzle.

So, start now and create a clear blueprint for where you want to be in 12 months. Once you have the image, then repeat it daily to ingrain it firmly into your subconscious mind (expect this to take at least 30 days).

In this way, you will see the picture in your mind gradually become reality. I feel like this is like real magic.

Your setbacks and obstacles can become opportunities

Pause and think about the past few days. I guarantee that along with the good stuff, you'll encounter a lot of frustrations and obstacles. For example: stuck in traffic, missed work deadlines, health problems, relationship problems, and bills in the mailbox.

This is normal. We all go through similar things from time to time. However, the difference between winners and losers in life is that losers will be defeated by setbacks, while winners will be pushed forward by setbacks.

Let me explain with a simple example.

You’re on your way to an interview for an important job—the one you’ve always wanted. You have enough time to walk to the station, ride three stops, and then take a taxi to the interview location.

You walked smoothly, but when you arrived at the station, you discovered a shocking thing - all flights were canceled due to unexpected reasons!

You can choose to panic at this point, or call the company to cancel or postpone the interview. Or you can think creatively...

This job is something you've always wanted to do, so you don't want to miss the interview and don't want the company to see a negative image of you. You think about it for a while, then decide on a strategy - you'll pay a hefty taxi fare to take you the entire way.

The taxi driver is very talkative and asks you what the purpose of your trip is. You tell him about your interview, and his answer is surprising: He's a friend of the guy who's going to interview you. He goes on to talk about how nice they are and how you will get along well with them. In fact, he puts you at ease and you even start to feel like you're part of the team already!

You arrived at the interview early, and with the unexpected but welcome support of your taxi driver friend, the interview went very smoothly. A few days later, you are excited to get a call asking when you can start work.

Did the taxi driver say anything nice for you? Maybe. This is what happens when you refuse to give in to setbacks and obstacles.

I hope that the self-improvement techniques I have outlined in this article will help you start to break free of your limitations and start breaking free from your mental prison!

Build your confidence. Embrace change. Imagine all the details of your success.

Take these steps now to start living the life you’ve always dreamed of. What prevents us from living the life we ??want 2

Meizi expressed to me the power of "relatives".

When she and her mother went back to their hometown to visit relatives, Meizi felt that her own value was rapidly depreciating when her relatives talked about "starting a family and starting a business", "a stable job" and "getting married soon" at the dinner table.

They believe that Meizi should enjoy a more stable life than they do after going to college. She does not have to travel around the world. She can be a civil servant or a teacher, get married and have children, and live a stable life.

The daughter of a relative who was not admitted to Meizi’s university was working as a teacher with a monthly income of 5,000 yuan including room and board, and an annual savings of tens of thousands. Much better than plums wandering outside.

But when Meizi asked about Ximei’s work, she was not satisfied.

Ximei studies advertising and wants to engage in advertising copywriting planning after graduation, writing advertisements for real estate, clothing brands, cosmetics, etc., and becoming a master in copywriting.

When I graduated, I found that the salary in the advertising job was low and I often worked overtime. Her parents felt that it would be slow and hard to get back their income, so they encouraged the younger sister to return to her hometown and become a teacher. The younger sister agreed.

With the help of distant relatives, Ximei successfully became a teacher.

Commuting to and from get off work on time and a stable salary make Xiimei feel stable.

However, after a while, the younger sister lost her passion.

This is not her intention.

Ximei feels bored by the too-stable small town life, and she wants to return to the advertising industry.

But compared to advertising professionals of the same age, she has one year less experience. She was afraid that leaving her job rashly would hurt the relationship with her distant relative, and her parents were firmly against it. They were afraid that her daughter's resignation would make it difficult to take care of the family, and her younger sister's future life would not be guaranteed.

Despite all the worries, Ximei continued to work and sent money to her family on time every month.

"What else can I say? Compared with many people, my life is already very comfortable. When I talk about changing jobs, my family will attack me, saying that I am tossing, hypocritical, easy to relax, and have to take detours ...Forget it, let’s do it!”

I wanted to encourage my younger sister to pursue her ideals, but after hearing her emotion, Meizi had no choice but to give up.

Yes, the so-called “involuntary” life that many people live is actually quite comfortable—relaxed, easy, and does not require too much effort.

This sense of comfort is the culprit that prevents people from living an ideal life.

It allows people to spend their time in a "fairly good" life day after day, unwilling to reconcile and not want to change. I always think that my ideal can be realized later.

If everything is too comfortable, you will lose the motivation to move forward.

Mei Zi works as a human resource in a company in City F, and her monthly salary is not high.

After deducting daily expenses and household expenses for my parents, the remaining amount is less than 1K per month.

This caused a huge gap between Meizi’s parents. They thought that their daughter would be able to provide a car and a house after she graduated and got a job, but they didn’t know that their life was very tight.

Mei Zi’s decision to refuse to return to the county to teach was considered stupid by everyone. Her mother also criticized Meizi: she only sees the present and has no plans for the future.

I wanted to take advantage of the Chinese New Year to talk to my parents about ideals and ambitions and the cruelty of society...

I had to give up.

Mei Zi also hopes to achieve some results soon, and she keeps pushing herself.

Two years after graduation, she got a job promotion and a salary increase, developed the habit of running and fitness, passed the exam as a third-level psychological counselor, and worked hard to become an amateur psychological counselor and a professional psychological counselor. Endeavor...

She enjoys the process of applying psychological knowledge to her work, and her little life in F City is also exciting.

But the parents only saw that their daughter’s salary was not high, her savings were small, and there was a gap between her and some of her peers. They felt that they could not afford to lose face, and ignored their daughter’s efforts and progress.

Life is not easy.

Life on the road may be harder, more tiring, and less supportive. It is those difficulties that make people feel like they are going uphill.

Mei Zi said: You can’t let life pass by like this, do your best to get better.

She set a time cut-off...

Let them see her achievements in ten years, let them see her choices, and her future life.

Knowing the life you want, being willing to refuse temptation, being willing to give up your current comfort, and being willing to fight for it are the reasons why life is great, and also the reason why few people can live an ideal life—— Most people can't.

The famous writer Haruki Murakami likes long-distance running very much.

I have been running 10 kilometers a day for decades and persisted in creating. His determination is impressive.

But he said, “I don’t think running every day has much to do with the strength of your will.

When you want to be lazy, ask yourself, as a novelist, do you not need Isn’t it a blessing to go out early and come back late in a crowded train without having to attend boring meetings?” (“What do I talk about when I talk about running”)

“Not there? If you can’t restrain yourself to a certain extent, if your life is too easy, you will be doomed. This is one of the reasons why you should keep writing even when you don’t want to.” He said in an interview with DaFang magazine. Reasons to keep running long distances.

Forcing yourself to escape from your comfort zone and not making life too easy is why Haruki Murakami continues to create masterpieces.

Well, if life is too easy, people will be doomed.

With the development of social economy and the enrichment of material conditions, the basic material needs of life can be easily met. There is no need to worry about food and clothing, and it is still decent. However, this life is not the same as the “wanted life.”

The life you want is often based on the pursuit of material conditions, accompanied by the pursuit of ideals, and the realization of a sense of identity, belonging, and value, which belongs to a higher spiritual level.

In reality, many people fail to live the life they want.

What is it that prevents people from living the life they want?

Comfortable.

Nikolas Goke, a writer in Munich, Germany, said: No one is willing to give up the comfort of the present in exchange for greatness in the future. Everything in life must be cheap, fast, and easy.

Yes, cheap, fast and easy.

It’s so relaxing and comfortable, you can’t bear to force yourself.

No one wants to take the harder road.

But nothing of value can be obtained easily.

Nothing of value is acquired quickly.

Nothing of value comes cheap.

If you are not willing to cook, you will never eat healthy.

If you are not willing to get up, you will never make your dreams come true.

If you are not willing to go to the gym, you will never have a toned body.

If you are unwilling to turn off the TV, you will never open a book and read.

If you are not willing to take a step, you will never run a marathon.

If you are not willing to go on a real date, you will never find true love.

If you are unwilling to show yourself in front of the camera, you will not be able to become an internet celebrity on a video website.

If you are not willing to practice playing the piano, you will never be able to give a concert.

If you are unwilling to save money, you will never gain peace of mind.

If you are not willing to travel, you will never go anywhere.

If you are not willing to invest, you will never become rich.

If you are not willing to work, you will never make money the way you want to.

If you are unwilling to step out of your comfort zone, you will not be able to live the life you want.

In the new year, make good choices, don’t be afraid of the difficult journey, just take care of the wind and rain.