When traveling with an elderly person, should parents and parents-in-law be taken separately?

Answering your question as a tourist

The normal retirement age for urban elderly is 60 for men and 55 for women. After retirement, the elderly usually either hang out in the community where they live, hang out or play mahjong and chess. For entertainment activities, you can either stay at home and take care of your grandchildren. If the elderly are outgoing, they can have more social activities, such as traveling.

The scope of entertainment activities and interests of rural elderly people is slightly narrower than those in cities, so they should be taken out for travel.

The first thing to consider is whether the personalities and education levels of your parents and your parents-in-law are at the same level. Whether the four old people can chat together on a daily basis? When there is nothing to talk about, the first consideration is whether there will be any awkward moments if four old people are brought together.

Secondly, if you are serious about taking the trip together, it is best to discuss it with your wife and ask her parents. At the same time, you should also ask your parents for their opinions. It must be your own. Parents should ask themselves, so that they can get the real answer. If both parties have no objections and are willing to travel, there is no problem in the first step of traveling.

If you choose to go on a group tour with a travel agency, you don’t have to worry about the whole process, just follow the group. During this time, you have to take care of the daily life of the four elderly people at all times.

If you choose to travel independently, make a plan for your itinerary in advance, including hotels, local cars, tourist attraction arrangements, mid-way meal arrangements, etc. Compared with group tours, it is more cumbersome. You can do more things yourself.

Always pay attention to the psychological dynamics of the elderly throughout the process. Before doing something or planning to go somewhere, it is best to discuss it together or inform them, so that the four elderly people can clearly understand the situation. Make arrangements, and when you go out to travel or buy some local specialties or small gifts, it is best to have both, so that it is as fair as possible.

One of the elderly parents may find it awkward to meet and spend a few days or a week together, and may not go together. If this is the case, reasonably arrange the trip for both parents according to their own holidays. It’s OK. It’s best to go to the same scenic spots, not too far apart. In this way, if one parent knows about it, they may be a little resentful or incomprehensible.

In the past, we were all in rural areas, and relatives were like enemies. As long as the children are married, the elders of the two families will basically stop interacting with each other, and even if they meet, they rarely talk.

Nowadays, there are fewer children, and some are even only children, so the two parents have more contacts. Some of us are even as close as one family, regardless of you or me.

If you, a young couple, want to go on a trip, should you take one parent with you, or all of you? In my opinion, it’s better to take them all with you?

First, they are all elderly and speak the same language. While walking, they talked and laughed, and there was always something they had to talk about. If you go with your parents. There is a generation gap between parents and children, and they rarely speak the same language. If you can't find a different topic, it will be very embarrassing to just sit there.

The second is to have a companion. The old people who used honey were about the same age and walked at the same speed. You young people can play as much as you like, while the old people can walk, talk and watch behind. Although there are not many places to go around, having someone to talk to will make you more interesting and infinitely happy.

Third, it can strengthen their feelings. Laughing all the way, talking all the way, taking care of each other and working hard for each other. Through mutual close contact, feelings are increased and understanding is enhanced. When the elderly on both sides are harmonious, the young couple will also be diligent and united.

If you only take one parent with you, the other parent will definitely have objections. If the old people on both sides have a disagreement, it will be very ugly for you and the young couple. Arguments over and over may break up a good family.

This is my personal opinion. Whether it is right or wrong, please give me your valuable opinions.

Hello! Before answering this question, I need to first understand the length of time you plan to travel.

If it is only for one or two days, I think we can be together. Such a short gathering will be more cherished by each other. It is also an opportunity for both parents to understand each other and deepen their relationship.

But if it takes more than four days, I think it must be separated. Everyone has their own living habits and things they stick to, and the journey is a test of human nature. In order to leave a good impression on both parents, I think it is better to separate.

Hope this helps!

I have always advocated that within our ability, we should take the elderly out for more walks while they are in good health. To avoid regrets in the future. As for whether to take both parents to travel together, it depends on the specific situation.

First of all, it depends on whether your parents and parents-in-law are of the same age. If there is a big age difference, their growth environment and background are very different, which will easily cause disagreements. A short trip of 1-2 days is fine. It is best to separate for long-distance travel;

Secondly, it depends on whether your parents and parents-in-law are from the same place. If they are from the north and the south, and their customs and habits are quite different, it is not recommended to travel together for long distances.

Again, it depends on whether the living and eating habits, work and rest habits, hobbies, temperament, and physical health of the elderly people on both sides are similar. If you are similar, you can travel together, which can strengthen your relationship and communication.

Finally, whether you can take both elderly people on a trip together depends on the cooperation of you and your wife, whether you have made sufficient preparations before traveling, whether you have made thorough decisions during the trip, and your ability to deal with emergencies. If you can work in unison, unite and be friendly when things happen, and if problems or differences arise between your parents, you can both coordinate and resolve them, then let’s take both parents together:)

Customize according to us After many years of travel experience, I have summarized some precautions for your reference:

1. As the elderly are older, the itinerary should not be too tight. Overwork will lead to a decrease in immunity and make them prone to illness. Stay at least 2-3 nights in each place, and don’t change hotels every night.

2. When traveling and eating, try to be as close to the elderly’s usual eating habits as possible. Avoid being too hungry or full, and be sure to bring enough commonly used medicines.

3. Elderly people have poor circulatory systems and should avoid long rides. It is generally best to ride within 2 hours a day and not exceed 3 hours.

4. It is more difficult for the elderly to overcome jet lag than for young people. If you travel for a long distance, it is best to rest in the hotel on the first day of arrival without making any arrangements to help the elderly overcome jet lag as soon as possible. If you arrive at your destination around early in the morning, most overseas hotels can only check in after 15:00 that day. In order for the elderly to check in directly, you must book an extra night in advance to give the elderly a rest.

5. Because medical expenses abroad are relatively high, buy a travel accident insurance for the elderly according to your own needs. Last time my dad and I had a delayed flight, he was compensated 1,500, and he was as happy as a child:)

I don’t know if the above answers can solve your problem, welcome to consult and discuss. I wish all the elderly a long and healthy life and travel around the world!

There is no doubt that if you take your parents and parents-in-law on a trip, they must be separated!

Isn’t there a saying that says so? No matter how good the relationship is between in-laws, it is better to keep some distance.

After all, it is a two-parent family. The family environment is different, the habits are different, and the hobbies are also different. I reluctantly brought my parents and parents-in-law together for a trip. If you have the same hobbies and tastes, it's easier to talk about it. However, one of them likes to walk and the other likes to ride in a car, but they can’t walk at all. Also, if one family likes to eat spicy food, and the other family can’t eat spicy food at all, how can you get them to travel together?

I once saw a young couple who originally wanted to increase their relationship with their parents and take them out to play. When they were making this travel plan, they thought they didn't have enough time, so it would be better for their parents to go out together.

The intention was good, but unexpectedly, such a well-intentioned travel arrangement turned into a nightmare for the young couple.

The woman’s parents have been used to being thrifty all their lives. They usually scrimp on food and expenses and are reluctant to part with food and drink. Every time I went to a scenic spot, I was reluctant to buy something to eat at the scenic spot. I even boiled water from the hotel and took it with me. As for the man's parents, whose economic conditions were already very good, they couldn't stand the behavior of the woman's parents. I think the woman's parents are completely philistine.

Once, the young couple reluctantly persuaded their parents to have dinner at a relatively high-end hotel. When they finished eating, both parties were pretty good. However, the problem was that after finishing the meal, the girl's parents insisted on taking away the uneaten food. The boy's parents thought it was unbelievable that the girl's parents had already eaten everything. It's almost the same, but it's completely embarrassing to pack it up.

Just like that, both parents looked extremely unhappy at that time. There was a quarrel in the hotel.

There were originally two days of travel planned, but because of this incident, it was forced to be terminated early. What was originally a happy trip for both parents to increase their relationship, eventually turned into an unpleasant trip that aggravated conflicts.

After returning from the trip, both parents still complained about their in-laws in front of their children, which caused the young couple to regret again and again. They almost parted ways because of the discord between their parents.

So, I think it is a good thing to take the elderly out for travel. However, parents and parents-in-law really cannot take them out at once, they must take them separately.

Don't be afraid of trouble and tiredness, but everything will be happy for your family and your family!

I tell you as someone who has experienced this, they must be taken separately. If you take both parents on a trip at the same time, I dare say that more than 90% of the cases will be good intentions with bad intentions. When I was unmarried, I once saw my in-laws, who were originally good friends, but because we took them on a trip at the same time, they all became enemies. Fortunately, they did not become enemies, but this had already caused a lot of trouble for the young couple. Fortunately, The young couple withstood the pressure and did not get divorced. As an unmarried person at the time, I couldn't imagine how terrible it would be.

It wasn’t until I got married that I realized deeply that the in-laws are two different families after all, and it’s difficult to get together. In the end, it’s your wife who lives with you, isn’t it? Both parents.

As children, while maintaining a filial heart, you must also use your brains. Opportunities like this kind of travel cannot be put together at once, they must be separated.

Elderly people will treat their children as treasures, and they will have various requirements when raising children. Especially as a grandmother, sometimes they even think that others are treating them. The grandson is not good, what kind of abuse is there?

Take my own child as an example. My own child is quite naughty. When we go out, my parents always want to hold them tightly and wish they could be tied up with a rope. However, As for my father-in-law and mother-in-law, my mother-in-law is more relaxed about children. It’s not that she doesn’t like children, it’s because of her old personality. She has the same attitude towards her son’s children, so my mother is dissatisfied with this situation. , there will be some nagging because of not paying close attention to the children.

Under such circumstances, it is impossible to take both parents out on a trip. This will lead to increased opinions and even conflicts.

When my wife first came to my house, she was not used to my food. She said it was too spicy. Their food was lighter and sweeter, and they liked to add sugar to their cooking. Now a few years have passed. When she returned to her parents' home, she found that her taste was different from that of her parents' family. As for my parents, they sometimes eat things that even the elderly in other families would not dare to eat.

Take mutton for example. My parents have better teeth. When eating mutton, they like the chewy kind the most, the kind that needs to be shredded by hand, and they usually like to eat it harder to bite. But my father-in-law’s family only cares about mutton soup when eating mutton. The cooked mutton is sweetened with sugar cane and sugar, and the mutton is also overcooked. My parents don’t like to eat mutton cooked in that way. .

My father-in-law doesn’t drink alcohol or smoke. He doesn’t even drink tea, only boiled water. Although my father-in-law’s job is the same as my father’s. A worker in the construction industry, but this is very different. My father drinks alcohol with every meal, even a glass of soju for breakfast, and a pack of cigarettes a day is basic.

My father sometimes has a pot of tea after a meal. Under this habit, if he goes out to eat at the same table with his father-in-law, the dishes will be different, and he cannot even share cigarettes or alcohol. Think about it. Still a little weird. This habit is different from that at home. If one of the in-laws comes to have a meal together at home, they will usually cook according to the in-laws’ habits, which is fine. When traveling, if you want to take into account the habits of both parties, then you also It will be very tiring.

So if you want to be filial to your parents and want to take them on a trip, I think it’s better to arrange them separately, and if you arrange them separately, you have to be careful not to favor one over the other. You still need to use your brain more on these.

I'm happy to answer your questions. This question depends on the situation.

1. What is the relationship between your parents and your parents-in-law? This is the key point. If the relationship is harmonious, then traveling together will be a joyful and enjoyable time. On the contrary, forget it and bring them in batches.

2. If the above conditions are met, then it still depends on the physical condition of the four old people. However, depending on the questions you set up, this should not be a problem.

3. When traveling with the elderly, you must choose a good travel location. Those that are too high, those that require a long walk, and those that require more physical strength must be taken into consideration, otherwise you will have to take care of four elderly people at once, and you will be busy.

Finally, I wish you a happy family and a long life for the elderly. If they are healthy, you can take them out to play more.

It is not recommended to travel together.

Because the parents of both parties do not live together, their living habits are different. If we go on a trip together, one of us likes spicy food, while the other likes salty food, some likes to climb mountains, some likes to play chess, some likes to eat noodles, and some likes to eat rice. Both parties live in their own families and have their own set of habits. When traveling together, if the two parties have some trouble or quarrel about something, the grudge will remain in their hearts and will not be gone away for a long time.

If you must travel, it is recommended to take a short trip of 1 to 2 days. Forget it is recommended for long distance travel.

Life is very stressful now, so don’t make yourself uncomfortable.

You can take the two parents on a trip separately, which solves the problem of trouble easily.

They must be taken care of separately. The elderly are older and have different hobbies. My father is 80 and my father-in-law will be 80 soon. I feel deeply about this. My mother passed away last year. My wife and I decided to take my father and father-in-law on a self-driving trip to Guizhou and Yunnan in order not to grieve too much for my father. As a result, after we went out, one of the two old men liked hard food, one liked soft food, and the other liked light food. One of us likes to eat spicy food. Two old people live in the same house. My dad, like us, doesn’t feel the need to turn on the air conditioner. My father-in-law is thin and always feels hot. This is so comfortable. Both of them gave my dad a cold. My dad I kept making noises about not playing anymore and wanted to come back. I originally planned to play for half a month but ended up playing for only seven days. After I came back, I vowed that I would only take one parent with me when I travel in the future, otherwise I would definitely not be happy.

Getting along with the in-laws is just a fresh relationship. It is best to have no contact and see each other less often. If there is nothing that involves the same thing with the children, there should be no gatherings. Therefore, the question in question is easy to answer. Don’t get together. Traveling is the best!