58-year-old aunt: After living with her daughter and son-in-law for 2 months, I finally understand who I can rely on for the rest of my life.

Generally, after retirement, the elderly will start to arrange their old age, if their children are married at that time. Don't worry about yourself at home, it seems that you can enjoy your old age comfortably. Many young people who are struggling in their posts are looking forward to the day when they retire, when they can live comfortably.

In the eyes of many young people, retirement in their fifties will enable them to enjoy their lives. In fact, they don't know that there are bad things at every age, but young people don't know anything about it, because they haven't experienced anything at that age and can't feel the same.

After struggling in life, I finally retired and seemed to live a free and relaxed life. But when they really retire, they also have their own difficulties, but others can't see them. Because at this age, everyone has children, it is a new contradiction to rely solely on children and live with them for the future pension. Sister Tan has such difficulties.

After she retired, she only lived with her son-in-law for two months and found out the problem, which made her realize that the old man could not live on anyone in his later years. Why did Sister Tan send out such feelings? We continue to look down.

Who should the elderly rely on in their later years?

0 1

My name is Tan, and I'm 58 years old. It has been more than eight years since I retired at the age of 50. Actually, I am a divorced woman. I had a bad relationship with my husband when I was young. In a rage, I filed for divorce. My ex-husband and I only have one daughter. Later, after the divorce, the daughter lived with her ex-husband.

In fact, I've always wanted custody of my daughter, but my financial strength doesn't allow it. Finally, the daughter was awarded to her ex-husband. After my ex-husband and I divorced, we didn't start a new relationship or remarry. Although my daughter doesn't live with me, I always pay attention to her.

I will also prepare some delicious food on weekends and bring my daughter over to reunite with her.

With the passage of time, my daughter was finally admitted to the ideal university, graduated smoothly four years later and entered the society. Later, he found a stable job by his own efforts, and then fell in love and got married. It's my comfort that the journey went smoothly.

I am satisfied to see my daughter's successful career and happy family. But the fly in the ointment is that my relationship with my daughter has not been handled well, which is also a heart disease for me. It is also the only reason why I regret my divorce for so many years.

When my husband and I divorced, my daughter was only over 7 years old. At that time, she was still ignorant and didn't know what happened between me and her father. She always asks her parents why they don't go home. At that time, I told my daughter and mom and dad that because some contradictions were temporarily separated, my mother would go out to live in the future. When you miss your mother, she will come to pick you up.

But my ex-husband has been teaching my daughter that she was abandoned because I didn't want him. Maybe she has hated me since she was a child, and we can't let it go until now.

Until he grew up, he gradually understood the problems between her father and me, and our relationship eased. She looked at me with less hatred.

I felt very satisfied when my daughter showed me her boyfriend. She told me that she would get married soon, and I was happy for her, but just three months before her marriage, her ex-husband died unexpectedly.

Although my ex-husband and I have been divorced for many years, we are husband and wife after all. I still feel very sad about her unexpected death. My daughter is going to the wedding day soon, and it will be somewhat sad that he failed to witness her happy moment.

When I was a child, my daughter was raised by her ex-husband's parents. According to reason, she was going to get married. These things should be arranged by her father, but now that her father is gone, I will naturally handle these things. During that time, my daughter was particularly depressed. She wanted to postpone the wedding, thinking that her father had just left and she would have a happy event. I think marriage is a life-long event. Since the date has been fixed, don't change it, but also for her future happiness.

During that time, I put everything aside just to calm my daughter's mood. So I moved in with my ex-husband and my daughter for a while. At first, I just wanted to calm down, so I moved back home to live my own life.

The wedding was held at the appointed time. After seeing my relatives and friends off, I greeted my daughter's son-in-law and prepared to move back home. But the son-in-law is worried that her daughter will do something stupid if she is in a bad mood, because although I have been with her during this time, her mood is still high and low, so let me accompany her again. I thought my son-in-law was considerate, so I continued to live for a few days, but what happened later made me feel very sad.

Son-in-law is engaged in artificial intelligence, and sometimes she uses the internet during working hours. They have no requirements for work, and it is easy to relax day and night when they are busy. At the son-in-law's house. There is a lot of high-tech artificial intelligence. As long as people say a word, the machine can operate according to people's requirements. Now that technology is more and more developed, we old people can't keep up with the trend.

Sometimes my son-in-law will buy me a lot of artificial intelligence things, saying that these things are suitable for the elderly, simple and practical, but these things are not practical for me. I told my son-in-law to buy less things in the future, and I'll buy them myself if necessary.

Maybe I'm being vague. My son-in-law doesn't know what I mean. He thought I was worried about his spending money recklessly. Not like I said, I bought less, but more and more.

Everything he buys is intelligent electronic equipment. If I accidentally use them, my son-in-law will be unhappy. If I don't use it, my son-in-law probably thinks I despise his things. I'm really in a dilemma. But he is willing to spend money to buy things for me, which means it is also for my own good. I don't know what to do now.

Usually, the mobile phone is used by the old man-machine, and the smart phone can't play, not to mention these. What about smart home appliances? After all, the son-in-law is not his own son, and some things can't be said directly. Since he is kind enough to buy me something, I can't help liking it.

One day it rained, and my back ached again, so I couldn't straighten up when I was lying in bed. Every rainy day, my low back pain gets worse. My daughter went to work that day, and only my son-in-law and I were at home. He is playing computer games in the study. I couldn't stand the pain, so I asked my son-in-law to buy medicine for me, but he was playing games with headphones on and had a good time. He didn't hear me call him at all.

I usually ask him to eat after dinner, which is the case several times. Sometimes you shouldn't call him once or twice. Later, I took off his headphones and asked him to buy me medicine. I said my back pain was unbearable, but my son-in-law said impatiently that he would win soon, so let me not bother him.

I had to go back to my room and lie down until my back pain eased before I went out to buy medicine. This illness made me understand that a son-in-law is not a family member. Even if the relationship is good at ordinary times, it is impossible to treat you as your own mother.

Even if you live under the same roof as him, he won't treat you wholeheartedly.

02

I have been living in my daughter's son-in-law's house during that time. At that time, I ate and drank at their house for so long, because I also had a pension, and I felt guilty, so I offered to take out my pension as living expenses, but my daughter felt that their financial conditions could afford my daily expenses, so she just let me live in her house with peace of mind, but I could see from her expression that I actually lived in their house, and she was a little unhappy.

Although our relationship has further developed now, after all, we never lived with her when we were young, and we still hate me more or less. One more person in the family has one more mouth. Although I don't eat much, I have a lot of living expenses for one month.

I live in my daughter's house and help her cook and clean. My son-in-law will give me money to buy food at the beginning of the month. Sometimes I write down my daily expenses in the ledger to let them know how much I spend. At the end of the month, I will show them the reconciliation. On the surface, my daughter said she didn't need to check it, but in fact she secretly checked it several times.

Now the cost of living is high, one or two thousand yuan a month. My daughter still doesn't like me. To show my love for her, I will even subsidize my family with my pension, whether she agrees or not, I will do it secretly.

I feel that I am a sponsor, even if I live here, I am not happy every day, because my daughter has no feelings for me, my son-in-law is an outsider, and their attitude towards me. Neither too cold nor too hot.

The second month after my marriage, I offered to move out. My daughter didn't speak, and my son-in-law saw that I was determined to leave. Ask my advice, too.

In fact, deep down, I still hope they can keep me. After all, that's my own daughter, and I may have to rely on them in the future, but they didn't mean to keep me, just said a few words symbolically.

On the contrary, my daughter and son-in-law were very kind to me when I was leaving. They are usually neither too hot nor too cold. In those days, they cooked me a lot of delicious food more enthusiastically and packed my luggage. Maybe they wanted me to leave long ago.

03

Before I left, I told them my thoughts. Now that I am retired, I can get a pension of several thousand yuan every month, which is enough for me to live on my own. After I divorced his father, I didn't find anyone else.

I want to enjoy my old age when I go back to my hometown. After all, life is only a few decades, so I went out with the tour group.

Actually, I just want to tell them that I can live better without them. You don't have to rely on children when you are old, as long as the old man has money. Let's plan our old age well, and if we really can't, go to a nursing home.

Conclusion:

How should people spend their old age when they are old? Are children reliable? It can be seen from Aunt Tan's experience that some children are simply unreliable. In fact, people are all the same, no matter at any age, only oneself can be trusted.

We are all independent individuals, and no one will accompany who through this life forever, because on this road of life, passers-by and short trips accompany us.

When people get old, they should think more about themselves, and it is most important to manage their old age. We are the masters of our own lives.

Today's topic: Who do you think people can rely on most when they are old? Welcome to share your message.