After I divorced my ex-husband, my mother took me on a trip to relax. Is my mother’s approach correct?

After divorcing my ex-husband, my mother took me on a trip to relax. When I arrived at the destination, I felt silly.

For me, who has never felt the warmth of home since I was a child, when I grew up, I put all my safety in my marriage. Since I met my ex-husband, I have decided to love him for the rest of my life, at least not to let our children make the same mistakes as our parents’ weird, disgusting, and depressing marriage.

I have disliked my mother for as long as I can remember. At that time, our family lived in a remote and backward village. There was a rapid development until now, and there was no slow pace until the past days. What didn’t sit well with this rhythm was my mother’s fiery and violent personality. She clearly expressed a strong dislike for anyone in our family, including her three children. She is very spicy, she dares to quarrel with our most authoritative grandma, and shows no weakness when facing her father, even if she punches her face in the end. Her hysterics didn't make sense to me at all. She was the one who started the fight. She ultimately suffered a loss. My grandma said my mother was manic and she didn't have a clear mind. Let's stay away from her.

My father looks like a true friend who has faced loess all his life and has nothing to do with loess. I think I was born in such a family, with such a mother, with such a bad temper and such an unreasonable temper. How pitiful. From then on, I decided to leave this closed environment, stay away from this disharmonious family, and go to a big city to form a happy family with my beloved. My grades are very good. After entering college, my mother showed rare determination this time. It turns out that grandma and dad don’t think a girl needs to read so many books. Finding a family and getting married early is the right way to go. But only if she stands here and says that her life is the safest only if she has her own hands in her hands. She usually doesn't interact with her parents and grandma and finally became silent, which is very rare.

My ex-husband is my college classmate. He is from the city. He has a cheerful personality and a sense of humor, and is very popular with girls. In retrospect, people say that a lack of love when a girl is young is very dangerous. They will be so moved by a man's kindness and care that they forget about themselves and feel that they have found someone worthy of loving them for a lifetime. This is the case for me. Just because he told me to put on more clothes when it's cold, drink more hot water when I have a cold, etc., I decided that he was trustworthy for the rest of my life, and I married him shortly after graduation. After only a year of marriage, he began to leave early and come home late. Sometimes, he disappeared for many days in the name of working overtime or traveling on business. However, it wasn’t until I happened to see him on the road with other women that I had to face the end of my marriage.

A week after the divorce, I shut myself up at home alone. I didn’t think about food and tea, and I didn’t answer the phone or cell phone. Three days later, my mom showed up at my house. Looking at me without saying a word, she walked into the kitchen and cooked a bowl of porridge, fried two side dishes, and forced me to eat them. Then she asked me to take a hot bath. After I delayed for a few days, she took me and her luggage out and said she wanted to travel with her to relax. This was my first trip with my mom in my 20s. I asked her where we were going. She smiled and said: "A home that only exists in my dreams." At that time, I was very surprised, where else could we be except our hometown? Walking all the way to the southwest, the scenery gradually became more magnificent. My mood gradually relaxed as the scenery changed, and I temporarily let go of the pain.

After getting off at a station I had never heard of, my mother took me to a small mountain village that I could see from a distance. I saw that it was very similar to our hometown, there was no special scenery. At a strange moment, my mother said calmly: "This is my mother's home, the place where your mother was born." At that time, I was stupid. My grandmother did not say that my mother was a neighbor in the village. My parents died long ago and I have no brothers or sisters. How can a mother's family come out again? As a result, my mother said that when she came out to work at the age of 18, she was abducted and trafficked by a middle-aged woman to her father's house, and she never had the chance to return to her parents' home. That's why she gets along so well with our family. Because of her unwillingness, she was forced to marry a man she didn't like at all.

There is no one left in my mother’s house. Even the house collapsed, and the well in the yard turned into a small puddle of dirty water. My mother suddenly started crying, and I couldn't help crying. When she came back, her mother said she had tried many times without success. Later, she gave birth to three of our brothers and sisters. When she ran into problems, she gave up on the idea. She said, now I'm hurt, I feel like my ex-husband betrayed me, but somehow I married for love and once had happiness. And she was never happy in her life, life was just a tragedy. She is right. My pain was too small for her. After I came back, my mother decided to stay with me. She said she was getting older and didn't want to divorce my father. It was nice to be apart like this, each of them had some peace.

Inappropriate people are destined not to be together forever. My mother said that people who want to leave you have their own reasons. People, it is enough to be kind to yourself. I finally breathed a sigh of relief.