Man recounts his blind date experience in Vietnam, spending RMB 70,000 and both brides escaped

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Introduction: Yesterday, the "Double Eleven" blind date event of a group buying website buying Vietnamese brides for 0 yuan was still going on. Mr. He, an engineer in Beijing, felt anxious after seeing it. Last year, he participated in a "Vietnamese bride" "In an agency blind date event, both brides ran away. For this reason, he lost his job and was heartbroken. He also spent more than 70,000 hard-earned money. "I lost both my life and money. I really"

Last year In mid-October, the 50-year-old Mr. He ended his relationship with a domestic woman. Feeling depressed, he saw an advertisement for a Vietnamese bride agency online. The Vietnamese bride in the advertisement was simply his ideal wife: gentle, virtuous, and family-oriented and beautiful. , and there are no excessive requirements for materials.

Mr. He recalled to a Beijing Youth Daily reporter that what first attracted him were the successful cases presented by Vietnamese bride agencies. The parties involved in the cases would post photos of themselves and their brides online. In the photos, grooms with happy faces are holding Vietnamese brides in their arms. Moreover, the grooms in these cases will update their living conditions from time to time, such as taking their wives shopping, accompanying their wives back to their parents' homes, clothes made by their wives for themselves, etc. , this kind of living situation makes him yearn for it very much.

Mr. He was not dazzled by the wonderful online posts. He spent a lot of time in the preliminary work of selecting an agency. In mid-October last year, he inspected several Vietnamese bride agencies. Several times, he specifically asked for leave from the company to visit the location of an agency located in other places, but the results always left him unsatisfied.

He said, "Many of these companies dare not disclose the specific company address. Once I went from Beijing to Hebei to find the company to find out the situation. The agency made an appointment with me at a place far away from the company. I drove seven turns. It was Baguai who brought me to the place.”

Under this general situation, the company’s qualifications and background are more important to him. In the end, Mr. He chose an agency with a Taiwanese background and ten years of experience in the Vietnamese bride business. The company asked for 30,000 yuan and said it could pay in installments and sign a contract, which made Mr. He feel that it was legitimate. In addition, this company told him that he could actually go there with a tourist mentality, but if not, just treat it as a tourist.

After finalizing this company, Mr. He began a period of time that he could not bear to look back on.

The first bride

The bride before entering the wedding room ran away on the grounds of domestic violence

Under the guidance of the agency, Mr. He took a leave of absence from the company and worked with The Vietnamese counterpart took over and stayed at a hotel specifically used for blind dates in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam. There are other mainland blind daters in this hotel, and we often spend time together and exchange experiences on blind dates.

On the Vietnamese counterpart agency side, the role of adoptive mothers is more important. "Adoptive mothers" are women in Vietnam who specialize in introducing Vietnamese women to foreign men for marriage. The adoptive mother will select some beautiful girls in the countryside who want to marry far away for intensive training. This training includes etiquette, cultivation and even the language of the corresponding country.

Under the arrangements of several Vietnamese intermediaries, including a foster mother, Mr. He and another client Mr. Liu who went on a blind date with him fell in love with two Vietnamese girls respectively. Mr. He's bride is 21 years old. But the day before the wedding, the Vietnamese agency refused to allow the two girls to have sex because they were virgins. Mr. He and Mr. Liu squeezed into their own room and let the two Vietnamese girls stay in Mr. Liu's room to spend the eve of the wedding.

"We were so happy that we rolled on the bed." Mr. He said that he and Mr. Liu were so excited that they couldn't sleep all night. That night, he also wrote a long letter of thanks to the Vietnamese intermediary, in which he praised the friendship between the Chinese and Vietnamese people. The Vietnamese intermediary did not reply.

After the collective wedding at noon the next day, Mr. He and the bride returned to the hotel and put his arm around the bride’s neck. At this time, the bride began to look around, feeling very uneasy. Since the woman did not understand Chinese very well, Mr. He had to use gestures to indicate that the two were married. However, after Mr. He kissed the bride, the bride jumped up with a "yeah" sound and ran into the bathroom to make several phone calls. In order to apologize, Mr. He even slapped himself. But in the end, the bride's family took the bride away with her suitcase.

Three days later, under Mr. He’s urging, the Vietnamese intermediary said that because he had used violence against the bride, the bride would not come back, and asked Mr. He to pay for the blind date again. Mr. He asked for a refund, but was told by the agency that it was impossible. He said that at that time, the agency said that apart from the genuine passports of the Vietnamese brides they sent, their identities, ages, etc. might also be fake. He had been in this business for ten years and it was difficult to get the money back. The agency had already retained it. Relevant evidence.

The second bride

In exchange for more money, she disappeared on the pretext of returning to her parents’ home

Afraid that the money he had spent was wasted, Mr. He finally Choose to pay another 20,000 yuan to go on a blind date again. This time, he was transferred to another hotel and fell in love with a 30-year-old bride.

What made Mr. He annoyed was that at this time, the agreed-upon itinerary for the 8th had been delayed for more than a month. , due to long-term absence from the construction site, the company has fired him, and the bride he brought back became his only sustenance. In order to take away his bride, when Mr. He left Vietnam, he gave the agency the last few thousand dollars he had stuffed in his cigarette box.

And this only sustenance ran away less than 20 days after being brought back to Beijing.

The bride said that her grandfather in Vietnam was sick and she wanted to go back to see her. After repeatedly asking to go home, Mr. He agreed and has never seen her again.

Mr. He sighed and told the reporter of Beiqing Daily that he was also tired at the time. This bride often quarreled with him. Although he knew some Chinese, the two could not communicate at all mentally.

The bride could not understand him. He once wanted to show his new wife to his friends, but the bride refused angrily. And Mr. He couldn't understand the bride. He remembered that once when it rained, his newlywed wife stood at the bus stop and refused to leave, letting the rain drenched her, which made him confused.

In Mr. He’s opinion, the second bride has a bad temper and is ready to run away at any time. One time the bride disappeared again. He was looking for her with a flashlight at night, but accidentally fell and knocked out a tooth. After much hesitation, Mr. He said, "In that case, if she wants to leave, just leave."

Now, Mr. He's colleagues all know about this. At first, Mr. He was angry and wanted to denounce the "black agency" and get his money back, but he did not dare to expose it to the media for fear that the bride would not come back if things got serious. After a few months, he thought about it. No matter what he did, the bride would never come back.

After searching in many ways, Mr. He said that he thought the second bride’s escape route was as follows: Beijing, Baoding, Hebei, Shijiazhuang, Kunming, and then back to Vietnam through Hekou Port.

Now, Mr. He still misses his first bride. He still keeps the photos of his two brides. From time to time, he will look at the photo of his first wife and cry with sadness, "I just want to use my example to make others who come after me be cautious!"

At least three of the four brides who were married on blind dates of the same generation ran away

“Too many escaped.” Mr. He is not an isolated case. He is just a groom of the same generation who went on a blind date with him. Now He knew of three people whose brides had run away, and one who had lost contact with him.

Mr. He said that Mr. Liu, the groom with whom he had the best relationship, was very attentive during the blind date. He brought a digital camera with him and used photos to show the woman his family conditions.

After Mr. He’s accident, Mr. Liu was afraid that the Vietnamese agent would also make excuses for himself, so he was very accommodating to the bride and paid all his money for her parents’ family, fearing that his wife would be lost because of a small incident. After all kinds of efforts, the bride's documents were finally obtained and he took her back to the country.

Similar to Mr. He, less than 20 days after Mr. Liu returned to China, the agency called to tell the girl that her father had died and asked the girl to return to Vietnam alone to attend the funeral.

Since the notice came from an agency, Mr. Liu believed that the agency must be responsible if something went wrong, so he prepared enough travel expenses and many gifts to send the bride on the plane. After that, the woman kept calling and asking for money. A month after the funeral, Mr. Liu hoped that the woman would return to China, but the phone call could not be reached at this time. A few days later, the Vietnamese agency told Mr. Liu that the missing bride had been found and asked him to come to Vietnam to pick her up.

Mr. He said that Mr. Liu, who knew about the incident, hurried to Ho Chi Minh City and was told that although the bride was found, she was unwilling to return to China. Even if she was sued, the Vietnamese government would not protect commercial marriages. The agency suggested that he go on a blind date again, give him a preferential price, or go back to China alone.

Mr. He understands Mr. Liu very well. "At this time, he is like a gambler who has lost all his money and is eager to get back his money. His mentality is the same as mine." He said that usually at this time, the groom would not I hope that all the initial investment will be in vain, and that a new bride will come home and take strict care of her.

Afterwards, Mr. Liu told Mr. He the follow-up on the phone. For the second time, he found a bride who was about his own age and not as good-looking as the first, wanting to reduce the risk. But on the night of the wedding, the bride said she felt unwell and wanted to go home, and never came back.

Mr. He said that other brides running away also follow this pattern. He has communicated with these grooms, hoping to stand up and expose such things, but many of them are hesitant and say that they still want to find wives. This matter has become known to everyone, and it is even more difficult to find a wife.

Now, Mr. He also believes that it is not a bad idea to go to Vietnam to find a bride, as long as the agency has compensation measures after the bride escapes, it is acceptable, because the probability of escape is too high. He still says that Vietnamese girls are very innocent, and what he denounces is just black agents, and those girls are just pawns in their hands.

Actually, the figure of 70,000 yuan is just the approximate amount Mr. He spent to marry a Vietnamese bride. It is difficult to calculate some bits and pieces of money, not to mention losing his job and being unable to explain to his family. The impact of the situation on oneself, "These black agencies will trap you step by step with various traps."

The bride's escape agency can exchange it for free or at a discount

In Baidu's " "Vietnamese Bride" post bar, photos of Vietnamese women can be seen everywhere.

The uploader of some of the photos said that the woman in the photos he posted was the runaway bride. "Repost what you see so that you don't get married by another Chinese man again." One of the online post authors described the purpose of uploading it.

There are so many such photos, and there is also a special post called "Vietnam Runaway Bride Exposure Platform", which collects and publishes the photos of everyone's runaway brides, and posts a photo of the runaway bride on the first floor.

A man who has been married to a Vietnamese bride for half a year said that he originally found a Vietnamese wife through a friend’s recommendation. He is from a rural area and his requirements are not high, so maybe the bride’s escape rate is low. Smaller. Nowadays, from time to time, he takes some friends to Vietnam for blind dates and makes introductions himself.

He said that Vietnamese brides have a high probability of running away. In addition to the fact that some brides are indeed professional brides, another reason is that some men who go on blind dates have too high requirements. In the Sino-Vietnamese blind date market, it is very common for the bride and groom to be between 15 and 30 years old, and many brides do not understand Chinese and the two parties do not understand the language. In this case, the groom needs to spend more energy to cultivate feelings, but many grooms cannot Do it.

He himself has heard discussions from some friends in the circle, saying that some Vietnamese brides use contraception on their own even though they marry home, and some even leave as soon as they give birth to children.

Beiqing News reporter saw that in many QQ groups of Vietnamese brides’ dating circles, Chinese men’s main requirements for women are virginity, youth, beauty, etc., and said that they do not care about money. Some people even frankly said that if the bride can stay with him for a while, even if she runs away in the end, she will run away and "just treat her as a bride."

Whether their Vietnamese bride will run away is a common doubt in the minds of men looking for an agency. Many intermediaries also stated before handing over money that they would have corresponding guarantees. A reporter from Beiqing Daily asked a number of intermediary companies. Some companies said that if the bride runs away, she can be replaced by another bride for free, but if she runs away again, she will need to pay money before going on a blind date. Other companies said that after the bride runs away, they will give "old customers" a preferential price to go on a blind date again.

Foreign-related agencies that cost 40,000 to 60,000 yuan to marry a Vietnamese bride have formed an industry chain

Beiqing News reporters consulted multiple Vietnamese bride agencies, and they all said that they must pay 3,000 to 5,000 yuan. A deposit of RMB 40,000 to RMB 60,000 will be required in detail. An agreement will be presented at that time, and the final fee will range from RMB 40,000 to RMB 60,000. All of this money will be collected by the Chinese agency the day before the wedding.

When asked to show proof of company qualifications, each agency rejected the Beiqing Daily reporter's request. An intermediary who claimed that his company's address is in Beijing said that foreign-related marriage agencies are not allowed in our country, so he and all other similar intermediary companies are private organizations. "That's the case, don't worry."

< p>Correspondingly, as Mr. He encountered, it is also difficult to sign effective contracts with these companies.

On the other hand, in Vietnam, foreign-related intermediaries have also formed an industrial chain.

A man who claims to have been paying attention for a long time and who really hopes to find a Vietnamese bride said that Vietnamese brides have been marrying in other countries for decades. As early as the early 1990s, entrepreneurs from Taiwan, South Korea and other places went to Vietnam to invest. Some of them married Vietnamese girls and returned home. These girls told Vietnamese relatives and friends about the superior life abroad. Build a house, buy land. Over time, more and more Vietnamese women want to marry abroad. These women attract more foreigners to come for blind dates, and there is a market. The profession of foster mother also appeared, similar to Chinese matchmaker.

He said that in Vietnam, there are big foster mothers and small foster mothers. The big foster mothers have information about small foster mothers in various places and women in big cities such as Ho Chi Minh City.

This man said that he would consider visiting Vietnam and treat it as a tourist. He knew what he wanted. But he is also worried that the agency's quote is not all he will ultimately spend. According to his understanding, in many cases, single payment is required. If the girl is not old enough, she needs to change her age. If the girl's natal family wants money, if the girl runs away and then goes to find a new bride, she will definitely have to spend all kinds of money to deal with related matters. Some intermediaries in Vietnam have even detained clients’ documents, so beware of these.

Warning

The Ministry of Foreign Affairs reminds us to be cautious about overseas blind date activities

Keeping the bride and keeping her from running away is a technical job. After passing this test, many men simply transformed and became intermediaries.

An intermediary who said that he was the best example of living happily with a Vietnamese bride said that because he found a Vietnamese wife and knew more about Vietnam, he could provide better services to his clients. The wife can find herself many good girls from her hometown, and the quality is more reassuring. Of course, the asking price is a bit more expensive, with an agency fee of 60,000 yuan.

On the 9th, the Chinese Ministry of Foreign Affairs released information stating that recently, some domestic group buying websites have launched free activities to send netizens to Vietnam for blind dates to find brides. The Consular Protection Center of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs reminds Chinese citizens to treat overseas blind date information with caution, and to understand relevant domestic and foreign legal regulations and agency qualifications before going abroad to prevent damage to their own rights and interests.

The Ministry of Foreign Affairs stated that China and Vietnam both have relevant legal provisions on foreign-related marriages. In recent years, there have been many cases of Chinese citizens who believed false information and rumors on the Internet and brought their belongings to Vietnam to marry a "wife". As a result, they were deceived and suffered financial losses. The Ministry of Foreign Affairs website reminds that in case of emergency in Vietnam, please call the police promptly and contact the embassy or consulate in Vietnam for help.

Text/Clues provided by our reporter Meng Yan/Ms. Hu