When I learned to love, you had already left.

Maybe everyone is the same. When you still have it, you are fearless, and you don't know how to cherish it until you lose it.

1

A few days ago, I met Haoran. He gained a lot of weight, riding a mountain bike, wearing a mountaineering suit and a thick down jacket.

The hair was a little messy by the cold wind, and the angular face was no longer bright and white. Without a trace of pride and surprise when we met five years ago, our faces are full of the vicissitudes of cyclists and the indifference of seeing through the world of mortals.

At dinner, I asked Haoran if you found Xiao Nan. Haoran said that she suddenly came back two years ago and married someone else, but she fell in love with traveling when she was looking for her.

2

Time goes back to five years ago. That year, my boyfriend and I traveled to Hainan.

It was about 7 o'clock in the evening when I got off the plane, and it was not completely dark. We ate some seafood at the night market in Haikou and went back to the sea view hotel we booked.

At nine o'clock in the evening, my boyfriend fell asleep exhausted after a day's flight. I went to the window and opened it. The sea breeze is refreshing.

The beating of the waves in the distance came faintly, the lights on the beach were dim and there were many tourists sitting on the beach. I couldn't help longing for the sea, closed the window and walked to the seaside.

In summer, at night by the sea, people flow as much as during the day. I stepped on the soft beach, walked along the waves and sat down when I passed a rock.

Hardly had I sat down when I heard a lazy voice. Girl, you are lovelorn. I just found a man sitting not far from the reef with a few bottles of beer beside him.

Who is lovelorn? My boyfriend is lying in the hotel. I'm just hanging out.

Perhaps because of the strength of wine, the man sat next to me like a friend he hadn't seen for a long time and began to talk to me. So I know his name is Haoran. He is a cyclist.

A bicycle, a person, riding and hitchhiking while working, thus riding half of China.

three

I heard Haoran tell the story of the city he had been to. In addition to being dumbfounded, more is envy. After all, I am a man who has seen the world. Chatting is very easy-going and very comfortable to get along with.

Sometimes sincerity can really melt the alienation between strangers.

After an hour or so, Haoran didn't see my boyfriend come to see me, so he couldn't help saying, don't you dare come out alone in a strange place at night and talk to strangers for so long.

I realized my gaffe in a trance, but I still couldn't help saying, rob money or rob color? If you rob money, you have no money with you. If I rob sex, I will be fine if I don't take you seriously.

Haoran drank half a mouthful of wine and almost sprayed it out. I looked at his expression of wanting to laugh but afraid to laugh, and suddenly relaxed. The sea breeze blew head-on, and Haoran and I talked more and more.

four

With my encouragement, Haoran told stories, people and interesting things he met during his trip. It was also the beginning of his trip.

Haoran was born in a wealthy family. Before 2 1 year old, I studied in the United States. After returning to China, I joined a famous enterprise company. There is a childhood girlfriend named Xiao Nan, who is gentle, sensible and considerate.

But like all dude, Haoran in his youth has the common faults of most rich children, such as rebellion and arrogance. Especially those who are good to themselves always take it for granted.

Haoran has superior conditions, and there is never a shortage of women around him. Xiaonan became a decoration in this way.

Even so, Xiao Nan is still gentle and considerate to Haoran, always accommodating and giving in blindly. This has also become a place that Haoran hates.

Haoran said that at that time, he even called Xiaonan to send him condoms to the hotel, and Xiaonan did the same. Manager Xiao Nan always said that he would go home when he had enough fun.

Haoran doesn't know if xiaonan loves him. Anyway, no matter what he does, peony will forgive him and forget about it.

five

When Haoran was studying in America, Xiao Nan went to America to see him. At that time, Haoran was on holiday in England with another woman. Xiao Nan waited alone in America for a week, and then Haoran came back. Xiao Nan went back.

I quietly listened to Haoran's story and watched him lose control of his emotions, and bottle after bottle of wine poured into his mouth.

Haoran said that such a woman would forgive him no matter how much she did. Two years ago, she suddenly disappeared, just like disappearing out of thin air. No one answered her phone until it became an empty number. I went to her house and found that she had moved away. All her friends and relatives seem to have an appointment. Tell him that they don't know where she is going.

Haoran originally thought that Xiao Nan was just tired and would come back after a while, just like before. But a month, two months and three months passed, and Haoran began to panic, get used to it, and began to feel uncomfortable. It suddenly occurred to him that it was so painful to lose someone.

Haoran added, you must think I deserve it. You don't know how to cherish until you lose it

I looked at this slightly drunk and particularly sober man in front of me and suddenly didn't know what to say. Maybe everyone is the same. When you still have it, you are fearless, and you don't know how to cherish it until you lose it.

Later, Haoran began to recall the places where Xiaonan could go, only to find that he knew nothing about Xiaonan. He doesn't know who her friends are or where her favorite place is.

He said that they had known each other for more than ten years. Xiaonan's parents died, his family changed, and Xiaonan became ill. He's not with her. He only remembers that Xiao Nan once wrote in his diary that he would travel all over the country. So, after half a year of decadence, he began to ride aimlessly.

Haoran thought he was tired after searching for a month or two, and then went home to continue his old life. But three months have passed, half a year has passed, one year has passed, and two years have passed, but Haoran is tireless and runs from one city to another.

Finally, Haoran said that he just wanted to meet her and ask her how she was doing.

I looked at Haoran with tears in my eyes and couldn't say anything comforting. Finally, we added WeChat to each other and went back to the hotel.

six

It has been five years since we met again. Haoran stopped by Shanxi by bike and came to see me. He no longer campaigned for Xiao Nan. I know he really fell in love with cycling, but he has been running in the mountains and rivers of the motherland with regret all his life.

This man who worked as a bartender in Lijiang Bar, sang songs in the streets of Beijing, worked as a waiter in Hainan Hotel, worked as a tour guide in Guilin, sold raisins in Xinjiang and worked in a factory in Hangzhou has been riding the road year after year with a woman's dream. ...

We always think that being loved is omnipotent until we lose it.

We always think that we can forgive as much as we love, which is enough to resolve the hurt, deception and indifference between us.

However, if disappointment is saved enough, people who love again will leave. Time is over. Even if we stand in the same place and wait, that future will not come, and time will not go back because of who. We can only visit in our memories, but we can't be redeemed in the past.

We will grow up because of one person, but that person may disappear from our world. Should we feel sad or grateful?

I know I will never meet another person after that, just like you did to me. However, no matter what, I hope you are well, even if it has nothing to do with me in the future.

People's growth is often at the expense of loss. When I learned to love, you had already left.