Four innate qualities in "Psychological Nutrition"

We often say that a thousand-mile horse always exists, but a Bole is hard to find. If we raise a plant, we must first understand what kind of flower it is? What kind of fertilizer is needed? How much sunlight is needed? How often should I water? Some like to be exposed to the sun, some in the shade, some need a lot of water, and some will wilt if given too much water.

So, how can parents understand their children better? We will see that some children are happy but have difficulty concentrating; some children are shy and play alone but have strong concentration. How can parents quickly understand their children's talents and shortcomings? Let’s learn about the four innate qualities, recognize children, and teach them in accordance with their aptitude.

Human personality is determined by two parts: "innate temperament" and "acquired learning". Let's first take a look at the innate temperament. There are four types. Everyone will have it in different proportions. There will be one main type of temperament. Today I will talk about two innate qualities.

1. Optimistic children: They care most about relationships and have the advantage of interpersonal communication.

Are there any children around you who can easily let go of themselves when they make mistakes and make themselves comfortable? I like chatting with people and being complimented.

Optimistic children are characterized by being positive and optimistic, good at interpersonal relationships, loving enjoyment, and eager for affirmation.

Points to note when raising children are:

1. Play the warmth card, be positive Express

"It's bad for you to do this, others will reject you" instead of "Mom loves you very much and cares about you. I believe you can do it..."

2. Plans and responsibilities

They focus on relationships with others and are not task-oriented. This will cause them to ignore responsibilities for the sake of relationships, fail to finish what they should do, avoid pressure, and give up on promised things. , this is a shortcoming, they need to be helped to distinguish boundaries and persist in doing what they should do.

2. Melancholic children: have delicate and profound feelings and are born perfectionists!

Is there such a person around you? If you just point out a mistake or a problem, his mood will fluctuate a lot. In fact, as soon as a problem occurs, he will deeply hold himself accountable. This knife will go deep by itself. , a gentle accusation from an outsider is like a straw, which will crush him. Are there people around you who think too much?

The melancholic type is sensitive and delicate, deeply focused and perfectionistic.

Points of note in parenting:

1. Parents are highly demanding and need to be given adequate psychological nutrition.

Do you remember the previous five psychological nutrients? These children need more than other children and need more. Because they are too good at introspection, even excessive introspection. Remind them that this is about the situation, not the person, it's just a discussion, you are great, I like you very much.

2. Emotional management.

Send less negative emotions to them; when they are overly self-reflective, help them channel their emotions in a timely manner. You know, it is easy for them to absorb their parents’ problems and negative emotions, thinking that they are all caused by themselves.

3. Interpersonal communication

This area can easily become their shortcoming. The trait of pursuing truth, goodness and beauty makes them particularly serious and even sincere. It is not easy for them to face and accept the imperfections of people around them. In interpersonal interactions, it is easy to go straight to the other person's shortcomings when looking deeply at the problem, thus keeping the other person at arm's length. When psychological nutrition is sufficient, they can be more tolerant and considerate of others, and have the ability to love and connect.

I feel deeply about this, because my main temperament is this type. There is also a saying in society that they are called highly sensitive people. One in five people will be like this. The mainstream social values ????respect extroverted communicative people, which makes the melancholic type who loves introspection instinctively think that they are denied. However, just because someone else is doing well does not mean that you are doing poorly. The melancholic type needs a more comfortable group and environment, needs to be alone, fully explore himself, and be himself, and only then can he have the energy to join the crowd.

Parents don’t have to put too much pressure on me. I’m in my thirties and I’m slowly coming out on my own. I really like myself after I turn 30. At the stage of children, parents do what they can. We have to believe that no matter how much we can provide the five nutrients, we will still cause some problems to the child that he will need to take the initiative to repair in the future. It turns out that everyone has the energy to repair and change themselves.

Parents, let us gradually improve each other's comfort, come on!