After kindergarten comes home from school, asking these three questions is enough to change a child's life!

Little beast comes home from school every day. What is your most common sentence?

Asking about food? Ask about the mood?

or ...

Recall.

Massachusetts Institute of Technology has studied that the conversation between parents and children not only determines the parent-child relationship, but also affects the biological growth of children's brains.

Like these 20 minutes after school.

Correct questioning can greatly narrow the distance with children and guide them to face what happened in school frankly;

The wrong way to open it may be the child's impatience and psychological rejection.

There is a saying on the Internet: "When you come home from school, the first sentence you say to your child is the most lethal!"

If parents don't want to talk about death, please remember to avoid the following three "pits".

Did you cry? Did someone bully you?

Every time after school, I often hear parents ask their children:

"Did you cry at school?"

"Are there any bad classmates bullying you?"

……

It seems right. It is natural for parents to be afraid that their children will be bullied at school and that their children will be naughty and get into trouble.

But if you look closely, you will find that this sentence is like a sharp knife, and all knives contain "negative energy":

Why do you cry instead of laughing when you go to school?

Why are bad classmates bullying children instead of good classmates helping them?

……

Child psychologists have found that children are very good at searching for emotional information from their parents' words and then taking actions to approach or avoid their parents.

Parents always guess "school life" from the negative side, but the nerve centers in children's brains that deal with appearances and complex intuition are not yet mature, so it is very easy to confuse what is reality and what is imagination.

Children will gradually form some "stereotypes":

"School is a place where I feel uncomfortable and have bad classmates. I am a weak person ... "

So what should we do?

Change the word, make good use of positive energy, and give children more positive hints:

"What happened in the school happy? Mom wants to know, too. "

"Did you have fun with the children today? Is it not playing well? "

"Good boy, have you done anything good?"

……

The more positive information a child gets, the more helpful it is for him to establish a positive social concept and a value emotion of equality, self-confidence and love.

Fairy tales are made up of beautiful words, and so are childhood.

If you want to enter the world of children, parents should know how to make good use of positive energy.

Is the teacher fierce? Did I criticize you?

Last month, I experienced an extremely embarrassing thing.

Once, I was waiting for my baby to come home from school at the kindergarten gate, and I saw my son coming, all dirty, with a pile of black stains on his chest, cuffs and ass.

Perhaps feeling my displeasure, my son soon found an "excuse":

"Are all bad teachers! It was that bad teacher who asked me to clean up, and I got dirty! "

What a coincidence! Just then, the teacher stood not far from Eva, listening and staring straight at it with a pair of eyes.

My black line, quickly gather together: "How can you say teacher?"

Helpless, from the son of "undermine" constantly:

"Mom, a few days ago after school, you said so:

How can the teacher look after the children when it is so dirty? This bad teacher is so irresponsible ... "

When my son speaks, imitate my tone and appearance.

I quickly interrupted my son, gave the teacher an "apology" look in my panic, picked up the "son of the pit goods" and ran.

Only then did I realize how harmful it was to ask a few words casually after school.

Habitually standing on the opposite side of the teacher, although it is to throw questions at the children, but always invisibly vilify the teacher:

"The teacher fierce not fierce? Did you criticize you? "

"How to cut it again? Why didn't the teacher inform me? "

"What's the matter with your teacher? How did you arrange so much homework? "

……

Children's world is black and white.

The prejudice of adults will become the obsession of children.

It is under this influence that my son gave birth to this farce.

What's more, when the teacher's authority is shaken, children will become extremely difficult to discipline.

During that time, my son was always in trouble in kindergarten, and what the teacher said was useless.

Since then, I began to adjust my "speaking style".

As soon as the children are out of school, my first sentence is,;

"The teacher pays special attention to you! You see, she specially contacted me today! "

"How is the teacher today? Did you praise you? "

"Your teacher is very attentive and has assigned a lot of interesting and meaningful homework today."

……

Praise and admire teachers in different ways every day, and guide children to respect and trust teachers.

The effect is also good immediately.

Children's trust and admiration for teachers have soared.

Now, my son is one of the best in the class, both in daily discipline and enthusiasm for learning.

I have heard a saying: "It is the best support for children not to embarrass the teacher."

Don't underestimate the power of the first sentence after school. Yes, the educational effect is twice as effective.

What did you eat at noon today? What dish, what soup?

As a mother, I worry about my children's food, clothing, housing and transportation every day.

Are you full at noon?

Is there enough nutrition?

Is the food clean?

The weather suddenly turns cold, will it freeze?

……

Therefore, most mothers try to ask their children a thorough question in the casserole as soon as they receive their babies.

Even fined a meal, what food, what soup, how much money, and how many times to go to the toilet. ...

How can children remember this? When my mother asks, she is either puzzled or impatient.

A few days ago, my son was a little upset at school. It happened that my company was busy and couldn't leave, so I had to wait.

During those hours, the old mother's heart would be nervous from time to time, fearing that something would happen to her son.

I finally waited until after work to pick up the baby. I want to know more about my son at school.

The question was thrown in a hurry, but what I got was my son's supercilious look:

"Mom, don't ask! I am too tired to remember. "

It used to worry me.

Yesterday, I saw the video of @Celia Ya, an educational blogger with many years of parenting experience, and suddenly realized its profound meaning.

Once, bloggers would ask children similar questions:

"What did you eat at school today?"

But every time I get bad feedback.

It was not until later that she discovered a little secret and changed the "open question" into "closed question":

"Did you eat chicken or fish at school today?"

This kind of question is usually short, easy to classify and quantify for children, and can prompt children to associate from A to B quickly, and it is effortless to answer.

Smart parents, even if they are eager to protect their calves, will attach great importance to the technology of chatting.

I have heard a saying: "Mother's question is not only concerned about children, but also conveys the correct perspective of children's view of the world."

A few words after school seem simple and trivial, but they can also be seen clearly.

All the answers are knowledge.

Word for word, all articles.

Really strong parent-child communication, even if it is just a sentence, can summon children's invisible inner self-confidence and support them to ride the wind and waves all the way forward!

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