Congenital temperament-melancholy type

Melancholy people look unhappy. Their life orientation is task and perfection. Their ultimate goal is to pursue truth, goodness and beauty. After ensuring a sense of security in money, they will pursue a sense of self-worth and the meaning of life. They are idealists and are willing to spend their time on the spiritual level. Be cautious in making friends, be loyal to friends, and hope to discuss so-called thoughtful and in-depth issues with friends. They care about their true friends.

1. What are the characteristics of melancholy temperament?

1. Pessimism and negativity: Melancholy has strong critical thinking. They often see their own shortcomings or deficiencies first, and it is difficult to be sure of themselves and others. If they want to learn to affirm others, depressed people need to learn to do so. Fortunately, depressed people love learning, and they usually grow up very happily by learning new knowledge. If you open a window of study for melancholy people, no one can close it.

2. Perfectionism: Melancholy people are perfect in nature and pursue perfection. Their life orientation is: task. When making all major decisions, giving priority to completing tasks is the most important consideration. In the workplace, we usually like to find melancholy people, because they are responsible, because they do what they say, but if they bring perfectionism into their lives, it will be very bad. Melancholy people have high demands on themselves and others. They usually feel that others are not responsible enough. Judging by their own standards, their interpersonal relationship is very problematic. For example, depressed parents or partners are very demanding of close people. This is because they are also very demanding of themselves. Therefore, depressed people should separate work from feelings, and work can be task-oriented and go all out to complete tasks. If they use this standard to demand a relationship, then the relationship will become very tense. So depressed people should learn to turn perfectionism into.

The biggest difference between perfectionism and Excellence is that perfectionism will focus on the result. If I don't reach 100, it's a failure. He will ignore the 100 efforts in the process and strive for perfection, emphasizing the efforts of the process bit by bit.

3. Brilliant: Melancholy is born with delicate feelings and profound feelings. Once injured, it is difficult to pull it out. They will choose to bury it, not to say, not to express, but everything is clearly recorded in the body, storing a lot of unpleasant memories, engraved in every cell. If they grow up in an unhappy family, the harm is even greater. After a long time, they will hurt themselves. They are more concerned about fairness, tend to be emotional and look unhappy. They like to pursue a sense of value and the meaning of life. Fortunately, they have all kinds of talents, especially in art, so they will express and deal with their emotions in an artistic way and find a way to release them.

Therefore, for patients with depression, we usually have to learn to look at things from the negative and look at things from the positive. For example, we can often ask, "What do you dislike? What do you like?"? This is not good, then what is good? " Guide from negative thinking to positive thinking. Don't think about deleting bad things from the beginning, we can think about what good things can be added, which will be better? Strive to change from perfectionism to Excellence.

Second, how do people with depression deal with interpersonal relationships?

1, depressed people should always be aware of themselves and avoid making people close to them feel uncomfortable: a depressed child with sufficient psychological nutrition, love and connection, sense of value and independence, and strong ability in all aspects. When the psychological nutrition is insufficient, the melancholy type is prone to depression and cannot be resolved, so the problem will appear in interpersonal relationships, which shows that people around him are easy to offend him, he will remember for a long time, and many people are depressed.

2, emotional management, don't bring emotions into intimate relationships: depressed people are more emotional and sensitive, and bringing them into intimate relationships is easy to hit a wall. They are born lonely and can tolerate loneliness more than others.

3. Reduce expectations of spouses and children, accept imperfections, and make intimate relationships and parent-child relationships more enjoyable.

Third, how to get along with depressed people in marriage, interpersonal relationship and parent-child relationship?

1, in the parent-child relationship, let the children follow their own rhythm, without control and coercion: depressed children know how to be responsible for themselves, and parents basically don't need to teach them. As long as they are given enough psychological nutrition, they will show the best of all aspects. Don't force depressed children to perform on stage, take the initiative to make friends. Melancholy people like to follow their own rhythm and are most afraid of losing face, so they will start to do anything when they are ready. For depressed people, whether it is strong control or soft control, they will feel uncomfortable. Once controlled, depressed people will rebound, rebel and conflict, while introverted depressed people will show procrastination. Whether your child or partner is depressed or not, please give them enough free space.

2. There is no need to criticize, but to accept and affirm: depressed people have extremely high demands on their partners in marriage. If two people often hear criticism together, depressed people will choose to keep a little in their hearts. If your partner is depressed, please ask him curiously how he feels, listen to him without refuting, and understand that he feels the marriage relationship in this way, accepting each other, not controlling, and not criticizing, because any criticism is enough to make the depressed person remember for five years.

3. Accept the imperfections of yourself and others.

4. Tell your needs and feelings