Biographical fragment

In April 1960, Pasternak felt the first signs of illness. His left shoulder blade began to hurt, and soon he was unable to write in a sitting position, so he could only stand and copy the opening lines of the play. The doctor found fluid in his body, but he didn't believe it. He remembered a patient at Botkin Hospital. The hospital also said that this patient suffered from radiculitis and fluid accumulation in his body, but Pasternak knew that this patient had lung cancer.

On Easter Day in April of that year, Pasternak came to Potapov Alley for the last time and met Ivanskaya. The mother and daughter were seeing off Irina Yemelyanova's French fiancé Georges Neave, who was preparing to return to Paris to recuperate after a serious illness. "Bo Lie is in a good mood, tanned, looks like a healthy person, and still speaks amazingly." During this meeting, Pasternak advised Irina Yemelyanova not to immigrate. "You are used to using the conditions of the Soviet Union to explain people's stupidity to yourself, but over there, you will directly encounter stupidity, despicability and shamelessness, and these are all unconditional and will be a mental blow to you. . But I believe in your destiny.” He also praised George Neve for his straightforwardness and simplicity. Several people drank two bottles of Widow Champagne. [1] Pasternak said that he wanted to write a book about the meaning of civilization and about the decline of humanity in art in Russia and the West. "No, there must be some meaning in this, as it should be!" He planned to bring some of these thoughts into Agathonov's mouth, predict the fate of art in the future era through the characters in the play, or write a separate chapter. In the evening, he and Ivinskaya went to Beretelkino together. She returned to her own apartment and he returned to the "Big Villa", where he received Renata Schweitzer, with whom he had corresponded for a long time and who came to visit for the first time. After a brief conversation in the study, he took her to get acquainted with Ivinskaya. Schweitzer rushed to kiss him at every turn. He pretended to be angry and asked Ivinskaya for forgiveness. When he got home, he took off his clothes in the corridor and muttered: "The coat is so heavy!" Then he sat at the Easter table for a long time, talked passionately, drank a lot of wine, and was very happy. .

The next day, he developed severe pain in his chest. Ivinskaya took him to find a familiar neurosurgeon, Baroness Giesengaussen[2]. She looked over his body, eulogized the verses of his youth, and declared in a quiet contralto that she found no major problems. Pasternak cheered up slightly.

At the end of April, his condition worsened significantly. He trudged to the villa management office and called Moscow. Ivinskaya asked him how he felt, and he said in a weak voice: "Hey, I won't live to be a hundred years old!" At the same time, Yemelyanova, who was listening to their conversation through another microphone, shouted: "You can, you can Live!"

On April 20, Schweitzer came to say goodbye and gave her nephew a metaphorical painting titled "Tiger", with one of the tiger's hind legs painted in black. , the boy meant that Pasternak had soiled himself in his native land. Pasternak exclaimed excitedly: "This is little Chagall[3]!" He immediately wrote a postcard to the boy to express his gratitude. Pasternak said goodbye to Schweitzer, waved to her from the front steps, trudged back to the study upstairs, and said to Nina Tabidze: "Please don't scare Zina and Lonichka. , but I believe that I have lung cancer and my shoulder blades hurt terribly."

On April 23, he went to the "little villa" again to look at Ivinskaya (Note: Pa's lover). She was pale and panicked; she recalled that he kissed her like that, as if he wanted to restore life, health, and strength...

On May 1, Krasheninnikova came to visit him. According to her account, Yevgeny Borisovich wrote: “He invited her to perform a confessional ceremony with him, closed his eyes, his deformed face shone, and recited all the relevant prayers in one breath. The power of the ceremony and The sense of the living coming of Christ was so striking that even when he unexpectedly spoke of the imminence of death, it became a trivial matter. ”

During the festival in May, it rained continuously. Ivinskaya and her daughter moved back to Beretelkino's residence and waited for Pasternak, but there was no sign of him until the evening of May 3, when Koma Ivanov sent him Upbeat letter as usual. Pasternak claimed that he suffered from angina pectoris, high blood pressure and neurasthenia. "Don't be sad, this is not what we want to defeat," the letter concluded.

On May 5, his condition suddenly worsened, but he did not change his daily routine. The next day, he wanted to wash his hair, but a sudden pain in his chest and shoulders almost made him lose consciousness. Myocardial infarction was suspected. The electrocardiogram did not show any abnormalities. According to the electrocardiogram reexamination on May 9, Dr. Nechayev concluded that it was a deep double-site infarction. Professor Fohlisen supported this diagnosis, so the Literary Foundation Clinic sent a doctor to Pasternak. Dr. Anna Gorodets.

He was already lying on the bed in the piano room on the first floor and was not allowed to get up. His brother and sister-in-law rushed to Beretelkino, and Tamara Ivanova also visited from time to time. Pasternak did not cry out in pain, but he was prohibited from turning over and lying on his side because the pain required him to lie flat. He couldn't sleep and couldn't help thinking about it. He sighed repeatedly and told the nurse that this was "a nightmare without a dream."

Zinaida Nikolayevna said that he usually eats something at night to fall asleep better. The doctor allowed him to be fed at 11pm, but he still couldn't sleep.

Pasternak couldn't bear to be seen unshaven. He asked his son to shave his face, and Lyonia did so. Reading is also not allowed, but he still talks and thinks about literature, and what he rambles about is literature: "The translations of Shakespeare and Goethe quarreled with each other, attracting me, and then disappearing."

Nurse Tell him it's best not to say anything serious.

"Then what should I say?" He was angry. "Didn't I mean the left shoulder blade? But it doesn't speak Russian."

He kept apologizing to several nurses: Look, I am sick and you have to take care of me...

< p> "What's wrong with you?"

"I have had discomfort and pain in my left shoulder blade for a long time, but it doesn't seem serious. Sometimes it can be so serious that I dare not admit it. It turns out that I I thought that I could defeat the disease through the body’s internal resistance. I was wrong. I caused all this to myself.”

This belief that physical condition depends on mental condition is entirely Pasteur’s fault. Ernak style. No wonder that one day two or three years ago, when Zinaida Nikolaevna asked him what complaints he had, whether they were mental or physical, he exclaimed: “I was not born to feel myself in a physical way! ”

Upstairs, repairs were being done in his study. Endless. The topic of restoration has been with him throughout his life, and now it has resurfaced.

Zoya Maslennikova brought cherries, which were rare at this time of the year, and squeezed the juice for him to drink. It was already very difficult for him to eat and he said, "Great."

On the night of the 13th, the situation got worse. He cried out for the first time that his stomach hurt, and that night he told Anna Gorodets that the history of his life would not end with the history of his illness. "The discussion will continue for a while in the future, but then everyone will recognize it. No matter what, I am a Nobel Prize winner after all."

The ECG signs are getting worse. My legs also started to hurt. Under the influence of opium alkaloids, he half-awakened and said: "The two heels are like personal enemies whose names I have forgotten, and they have taken matters into their own hands." Even so, he did not let the nurse get close until his wife finished washing him. , he put on the dentures himself. He calls it "living by the teeth."

On May 14, at the request of Ivinskaya, Professor Dolgoprosk, who had treated Pasternak for myocardial infarction in 1952, came to check on his condition. I had a consultation the next day and it was determined to be gastric cancer. Relatives were not informed. He was injected with a powerful analgesic and he fell asleep. As soon as he woke up, he asked:

"Where is Leonov?"

"Leonov is not here. ”, the nurse replied.

"He was sitting here just now, and we were talking about "Faust"... Please don't give me any more anesthesia."

In order to relieve the pain, give him An oxygen tent was installed so that he could fall asleep.

At one point, the nurse asked, "How do you feel about yourself?"

"Anything can happen, but in the process, I feel at peace," he replied.

He no longer drinks his favorite strong tea. He learned that he had an ulcer, but he didn't know who he heard from. In this case, a rich-flavored diet is the most harmful to the body. He began to refuse the food prepared for him by the domestic worker Tanya: "She is so stupid on this issue."

"Look what you said, Tanya gave her whole heart!"< /p>

"She gave her heart, but left the dirt."

He said to Nina Tabize: "I love you all. But now, I no longer All that was left was a mess in his chest and stomach.”

The Dutchman sent a large bouquet of tulips, but he asked not to bring them into the room because he did not like flowers in vases and only liked nature. inside. Every day he asked if the cherries had bloomed. It was a hot and humid May, but the cherries had not yet bloomed. "While I'm sick, I'd rather it be cloudy," he said ruefully. He can't stand the hot weather.

Anna Gorodets praised his youthful and healthy muscles and elastic skin. In the last days of May, he grew thinner and thinner. What he feared most was that his relatives proposed to call Ivinskaya to him. Gorodets guessed that, in his mind, this meant his situation was hopeless. Zinaida Nikolaevna even planned to leave home on her arrival, but he rejected the idea.

During the morning check-up on May 18, Gorodets felt a metastasis of lesions on his left supraclavicular area, and immediately rushed to Moscow to seek consultation.

In the evening, an oxygen tent was set up for him. He could barely move.

"Look what I have become! I fell into the boring tables between the pages."

Marfa Kuzminichna is an elderly, A nurse with a stern attitude. Pasternak said to her: "Marfa Kuzminichna, you may not have been favored by life. But you have a kind heart, you are so majestic and cherish your reputation. You can do anything. Come, if you wish. Please do something for me, Marfa Kuzminichna, I really want to live.

Don't worry, please sit down and think about it before you do it... I live a double life. Oh, if you knew her you wouldn't condemn me. Have you ever had a double life? ”

He never told anyone about Ivinskaya, but occasionally sent the sixteen-year-old nurse Marina Rasoshina to Ivinskaya to comfort her.

On May 22, with the help of her brother, a famous radiologist, Yelena Tagg[5] actually moved a fluoroscopy machine to the villa.

"Here. , now it’s okay,” Pasternak said, “Everything will be clear, and there will be another result. ”

Based on the fluoroscopic images, Professor Tagg concluded that it was a left lung cancer, and that it had spread to both lung lobes. This is the fastest form of cancer, usually caused by a strong mental shock. It seems, The symptoms began to develop in the last months of 1959, when the situation was ambiguous and direct threats from the authorities replaced persecution.

After the fluoroscopy, Pasternak lost a lot of weight for the first time. . The denture was placed on his bedside in a brown box with peeling enamel. The box had been intact for many years.

The nurse told him that the film showed that it was chronic pneumonia. . He didn’t believe it.

On the 23rd, the doctor in charge of the Literary Foundation’s outpatient department came to visit him. “The lovely doctor,” he said, “is a bit like Fei Ding. (Note: Soviet writer, Pasternak’s neighbor)”

Some foreign reporters were always waiting near the villa. The whole of Moscow knew about the diagnosis, and the West also knew about it. Pasternak asked that his sister be released Diya was recalled from London. She was planning to leave immediately, but the Soviet embassy delayed her visa.

At 4 o'clock in the morning on May 27, Pasternak's pulse disappeared and he was called. It took a few shots to recover. “I feel great. I couldn't feel anything at first, but your injections brought me back to uneasiness. "

"If you die like this," he repeated the same sentence for several days, "there is nothing to be afraid of. "

"Life is beautiful," he said to the nurse. "If life continues, I will use it to resist vulgarity. In World Literature and Chinese Literature. Too much vulgarity. People's writing is not on point. "

He also said that he should write about the work of nurses: "Well, yes, you are laborers. There are so many troubles in the world, and any activity is so complicated and difficult, but here it is shown so noble, sincere and selfless. This is what I'm going to write about. "

He also asked Olesha (Note: Soviet writer) if he was still alive. He didn't know that Olesha fell ill in April and died in early May.

" I feel like there is filth all around me," he told his eldest son. "I heard you should eat to whet your appetite. But it was excruciating. The same is true in the literary world. Approval is not approval at all, but ignorance. No memories of the past. Relationships are ruined in different ways. It's like being in a pile of filth. Not just here, but everywhere in the world. In order to preserve man's free and uninhibited genius, the whole life becomes a duel with absolute vulgarity. A whole life has been spent on this. "

On May 27, a blood transfusion was given to him. He said that he had donated blood during the war. When the needle was pulled out from the vein, the blood flowed to the bed and the doctor's white coat.

"Bloody pictures," Pasternak said

The next morning, he asked the doctor:

"Have you ever treated me for a myocardial infarction? Patients with complications? "

"Yes," replied the doctor.

"Have they recovered? ”

“Yes. "

"Then tell me their names. ”

She named several writers. He seemed to calm down.

At night, the nurse on duty fell asleep for a while in front of him, but soon woke up and felt that he was Look at her.

"I'm sorry," the nurse said sheepishly

"It's okay," he smiled, "You're in good condition. "

Once, Gorodets asked him to read aloud.

"You know, I am writing a book myself, why should I read someone else's? " He replied a little angrily.

On the 28th, his condition deteriorated completely.

"Since you know everything," he said to the nurse, "why use this method? A noose tying my life inside? Please look deep into your own soul. Life is beautiful, very beautiful. But death is inevitable. "

On the second day, he couldn't wait for the blood transfusion, because after the first blood transfusion, he felt much better. He called Lonia and asked him how the exam went. In the evening, the heat Nya also came. Pasternak asked him to come, but said nothing.

Professor Kashirsky was the only doctor who did not charge for the consultation. , Pasternak had less than five days left, but Pasternak was still alive. On May 29, Nina Tabize came to visit him as usual. He grabbed her hand, touched his fingers, and said: “Ganatsvale.

"[6] Tabize specially put on some lipstick that day and wore brighter clothes than usual. Pasternak said that she and Zina had completely changed and looked out of place. He also repeatedly said that he was going to die. This would free them from their worries about him. Nina decided to appear in front of him with a slightly younger and fresher face:

"Your health has improved, and Nina and I look fine too. good! "

He shook his head and said: "No, Ninotchka, my health is terrible, and neither are you. "

On the morning of May 30, as usual, he asked his wife to comb his hair, jokingly saying that this is not how the hair is separated. He was waiting for a blood transfusion. The doctor did not make a decision for a long time, and he did not know why. The blood transfusion finally started, and a stream of blood spurted out of his throat.

"Lida [7] is on her way," the eldest son said repeatedly, "wait for her to come." p> "Lida, this is great", he said

He asked his wife to be alone with him

"I love life, and I love you too", he said. Say to her, “But I have no regrets in parting from you: there is too much vulgarity around us, not only here with us, but in the whole world. No matter what, I won't make peace with it. I can't thank you enough. "

He asked his wife to call his two sons to him.

"Well, it's time for us to say goodbye, right? "

This sentence is laced with doubt.

"You two are my legal sons. After my death, in addition to the natural sorrow and pain, in addition to the loss itself, You will not be threatened in any way. You are recognized by the law. But there was another side to my existence, an illicit side. It is well known abroad. The reason for this is because of my fate, what happened in my career, and especially because of the recent controversy surrounding the Nobel Prize... When Leda comes, she will pay attention to these situations. There's a lot she should know from more than just you. Leda will take care of it... This is the illegal side and no one will be able to maintain it after my death. Do you understand? "

"You want to say," Zhenya asked, "that you want to entrust us with everything you leave behind, right? "

"No, that's not what I meant at all. I hope you have nothing to do with this, and I hope this forced indifference will not embarrass you or become a burden to you. "

His breathing became rapid.

"What is your next procedure? Oxygen tent? Then use an oxygen tent. "

He said to Marfa Kuzminichna, who was holding his head:

"I can't hear clearly. There seemed to be a fog in front of my eyes. But this will eventually subside, right? "

Zinaida Nikolayevna and her two sons stayed by his side.

At eleven o'clock that night, he said to his wife:

"Please forgive me. "

He paused for a moment and then said:

"I am happy. ”

2

At the same time, among those people with whom he has been close throughout his life and whose contacts have occasionally been interrupted, a banquet that looks like a mystery drama is being prepared: someone Busy before the banquet, checking to see if everyone has arrived at his favorite spot; the host Jizian Tabize arranges the guests to sit and fills the huge horn cups used for fine wine, proud of the right to host the feast ; Paolo’s friend advised Vladimir’s [8] friend not to explain the situation from the beginning (“Think about how you felt at the beginning”), Reiner took a slightly closer position: “I can finally see He did it! "A group of old men gathered near: Hey, hurry up... People haven't sat down yet, chatting as usual: Oh, if he had known in advance, who would have delayed even a minute! In fact, if he had not been disturbed the day before yesterday, he might have Here he was. The atmosphere of the coming gathering attracted everyone, including those who had a grudge against him, although, it should be admitted, there were far fewer people than usual on the approach of such an important guest. Change after change, he needs to be included immediately, because masters of his level will also be scrambling here, and you know that this is an extraordinary moment when the happy waiting reaches its climax, and it is not surprising to think of the hardships of his final journey. Some people feel sad: in the end, everyone will go through this process, it's no big deal. He has frequently done strange things, as if he was no longer alive... In essence, if everyone behaves like this, the world How wonderful it would be!

The whirlwind is flying, the dark clouds are speeding, and the stars are sending their glances; everything is ready, the corridor is vacated, and the final decorations are completed on the dining table; suddenly, a ray of light comes from the feast in the sky. The pale reflection made the shade of the cherry trees he planted pale. It was an unusually hot day in May. The event was scheduled to take place at 11:20; "He's here, he's here!" ", whispers came from among the seats. With expressions of infinite sincerity, Paolo and Ji Qian walked towards him. No one competed with them for the right to welcome him first. He looked around and saw countless blurry figures lined up. They formed a queue, hidden in the golden glow of the celebration; everyone was in a mixed mood of joy and sorrow, and gradually, joy clearly gained the upper hand. He could already hear the musicians adjusting their bows and the banquet could begin. ; There is no need to ponder and trouble over the words here; it is obvious that everyone can understand them correctly.

Oddly, breathing was getting easier and easier. He stepped towards his friends: before him were a series of toasts, with gorgeous words full of respect. At this moment, a very simple word is enough. Just one word, and they will recognize him as he was before, without doubting his authenticity. Because his feelings of happiness once again miraculously matched reality, and the reality filled with joy infinitely surpassed these feelings, he could not help but feel happy. He bowed his head to the people coming towards him and said briefly. :

"I am happy."

A burst of cheers rang out: This is still him, the real him in his prime. Others thought that when he turned to face them, he was probably trying to say that he was happy for their presence, for dying peacefully at home, or that his suffering was finally over, but none of this actually mattered... …

1

“In the early morning, the sun kept its promise/came as scheduled, shining orange light/slanting through the window/between the curtains and the sofa.” [9] 1960 The morning of May 31, 2011 came. This was the first day that Pasternak was lost in this world.

Zinaida Nikolayevna washed his body together with the housekeeper Tanya. At six o'clock in the morning, Ivanskaya hurried over without encountering any obstruction. She stayed by the bedside for a long time, saying goodbye to him silently. She felt like he still had some warmth and his hands were still soft. On June 1, a coffin was brought to the city and the body was buried. The Literary Foundation sent two funeral organizers to ask Zinaida Nikolayevna how she thought the funeral should be conducted. "Let the music keep playing," she replied. "My mood should be calm, and things should be done in a plain and simple way, just like his plain and simple life."

The coffin was parked in the restaurant. The strong and fat Yuzina was helped up the steps with difficulty. She, Stasik Negaeus and Richter[10] performed the music respectively. Accompanied by violin and cello, Yuzina played Pasternak's beloved trio Tchaikovsky's "In Memory of a Great Artist." [11] Then he played many pieces of Schubert's music alone. The sculptor Vilensky made a mask from the dead Pasternak's face. Flowers surrounded the coffin, and an endless stream of people passed by to say goodbye to him.

At dusk, Irina Yemelyanova and George Neve came to bid farewell to Pasternak. Irina, who has always been afraid of death and the dead, was deeply shocked by his cold appearance: she had never seen him comb his hair in a parted way, and he always had droopy forehead hair.

"Lying here is simply another person with a noble face, old, quiet, thin, with a reproachful (no, rather stern) look. Once upon a time, such a person was entirely possible Living in the world is not Paul Lie, but someone else. Death, no matter how much he has thought about it, no matter how many words he has written about it and how many times he has prepared to face it, death has never come close to him. From his daily life. There is no different language between them. Death cannot adapt to him. This change makes me so shocked that I can't even cry. I feel relieved for a moment. , suddenly realized: What does this have to do with him? This is not him, no!

George Neave and I looked at each other. Yes, Paul Lie was not in this space. I can't describe my feeling. Perhaps this is a unique religious experience in my life. What if? Is it a sign that we will not die, and we will not die in the end?

Everyone came out and stood on the porch. He is here, with us. Look, this is the sky, the trees, the ditch, the bell tower in the distance, the spring day. The setting sun is greater than the one we left in the room. This is indeed the feeling of miracles, which suddenly and unexpectedly hit us unprepared materialists. And encounter.

Returning to the village, the miracle did not leave us. It looked at us from behind the half-dry stream. For us, this haystack is always in the shadow of the long hayloft without moonlight[12]...but more from the sky, the miracle follows us until we reach the house, and then disappears. , let us stay alone with chaos and fear, but the key is that it has been here before and it is fleeting, which gives us strength. ”

In the evening, from the Beretelkino Church. The high priest Joseph gave him a requiem prayer. The funeral is scheduled for June 2nd. A handwritten notice was posted next to the ticket window of the suburban line of Kiev Railway Station:

"Comrades! Between the late night of May 30 and the early morning of May 31, 1960, the greatest poet of our time One of them, Boris Leonidovich Pasternak, passed away. A civil prayer ceremony will be held at 15:00 today at Beretelkino Station."

The announcement in the Literary Gazette is worthy of being recorded in history as an example of revenge for the dead and as proof of despicability: “The Board of Directors of the Soviet Literary Foundation announced that due to long-term serious illness, the writer and foundation member Pasternak Boris Leonidovich passed away on May 30 this year at the age of 70, so I would like to express my condolences to the family of the deceased.

”

People from the whole village, dressed in their best new clothes, came to see him off. Many gray-haired ladies and serious, upright old men came from Moscow to pay tribute to these former Boys and girls, he wrote his own works; they no longer meet together. This was once a small and tight-knit group of old Moscow intellectuals who found solace and justification in him. People are destroyed by the times, but after all, it is impossible to destroy everyone. -------------------------------------------------- -

[1] "Veuve Clicquot" was founded in 1772. In 1805, the owner of the winery unfortunately passed away. His young widow inherited her husband's business, constantly pursuing perfection and innovation, and brewing quality wines. Superior products, making "Veuve Clicquot" one of the most famous champagne brands in the world

[2] Original text

[3] Marc Zaharovi. Chagall (1887-1985), a Belarusian-born French painter and an outstanding representative of avant-garde painting in the 20th century, was born in Tsarist Russia. In 1922, he left Soviet Russia and moved to Western Europe, finally settling in France.

[4] Wife of Vsevolod Ivanov

[5] Yelena Mikhailovna Tag (18951964), Russian-Soviet poet, essayist, and memoirist. .

[6] The Russian transliteration of a common expression in Georgia is equivalent to "dear", "my friend", and "comrade", expressing love and respect for the listener.

< p> [7] Lidia's nickname

[8] "Vladimir" here may refer to Vladimir Mayakovsky. "Rainer" refers to Rainer Rilke

[9] Quoted in "August" (1953)

[10] Svyatoslav T. Ofilovich Richter (19151997), a Ukrainian pianist of German origin, one of the greatest piano artists of the 20th century

[11] This is Tchaikovsky's "a." Subtitle of "Piano Trio in a Minor"

[12] Quoted from "Love, Let's Go, The Thunderstorm Has Not Stopped" (1917).