I am not alone in appreciating the content of fighting.

& lt/strong & gt； preface

Ten years of CCTV dream, leaving a football commentary.

So far, I have had three jobs-a short tour guide, a short reporter, and then a long sports review. In my opinion, my pursuit and transformation of different occupations are somewhat similar to those of hunters of ancient nomadic peoples. Nomadic people "live on aquatic plants" and "follow the herd", and their excellent hunters become the eagle of the tribe, relying on speed and reaction to survive, relying on innate hunting skills, paying hardships to survive and create civilization. My experience over the years is so unpredictable and logical. Whether I am a tour guide, a reporter or a sports commentator, I am confident that I have done a good job. I have been dedicating myself, doing my best and getting the due reward, so I thank football, life, and the fans who support me, care about me and love me. They let me confidently face the choice of life, and they really realized that I was not fighting alone!

Now, life is lucky to give me another choice. I will face new challenges with confidence. Or I should be another myself in the years to come. The Monkey King was not the Great Sage, but actually became the bodyguard of Tang Priest on the way to fetch Buddhist scriptures from the West. Schwarzenegger did not play Terminator and became governor. What I will do in the future, I don't know, maybe only God knows. I believe in the old saying: I can't do whatever I want, but I want to be innocent-this can also be my footnote in 2006.

My 2006 is finally over. I don't know whether to be relieved or reluctant; I don't know whether I should be glad that I was reborn from the fire or lament my ill-fated life.

There should always be such a year in one's life. One year is like being stuffed into a rocket propulsion device, one year is like being in the center of a nuclear explosion, one year is like the epicenter of an earthquake of magnitude 8, and one year is like being involved in a tornado; A person's life may not be able to bear such a year for the second time, because whether it is mental or physical, it is an extreme exercise. You may collapse, get lost and despair at almost any time.

My 2006, its changes seem dangerous and bizarre, but the essence is calm and simple. ...

1, the joy of signing a contract.

At the beginning of 2006, my semi-autobiographical new book "Fight Like a Man" was published in Fu Zi. In the first week of April, under the arrangement of the publishing house, The Story of War was first published in Wangfujing Bookstore in Beijing. I had hoped that it would be a small gathering, where colleagues at work and friends from Dream Boat Football Team would get together, which would be regarded as a summary and explanation of my work and life in recent years. My colleagues and friends gave me face and congratulated me one after another. I thank them. What excites me even more is that thousands of readers and fans poured in that day, and the team lined up from the sixth floor to the second floor underground, even outside the bookstore, and the signing time was as long as two and a half hours. You know, my initial guess was that as long as one or two hundred people came to join in the fun, they would be satisfied. Because in recent years, China's football market has declined, and my work and popularity have always been closely related to football. So publishers, bookstores and myself didn't expect such a grand occasion. I don't know any of these fans. They came to join me and had an indescribable emotional impact on me. If I have anything in common with them, it should be the language of football and sports. So I am very grateful to them, and I am also grateful to the industry I am engaged in-sports commentary.

From the beginning of April to the end of May, I toured all over the country to sign books. Qingdao, Shanghai, Changchun, Dalian, Nanjing, Hangzhou, Shenzhen ... I even went to some cities for the first time, such as Changchun. The plane arrived at Changchun airport. It was early summer evening and it was getting late. This highway looks desolate. I noticed the last light of the day in the sky outside the window. It is calm and elegant, leisurely, and finally slowly hidden in the boundless night. This is the most common beauty in the world and needs people with the same mood to appreciate it. I am glad that I can often be moved by such scenes. In order to cooperate with the sales of bookstores, sometimes a city will have more than two signing activities. I am flattered by the readers all over the country, and the enthusiasm of my friends in the north is more exposed and direct. There are many female readers at the signing ceremony in Changchun. I vaguely heard a girl answer the camera, "I just like Huang Jianxiang, there is no reason ..." Everyone burst into laughter.

Of course I smiled happily, too. At that moment, I said to myself: You are a lucky man.

Therefore, in the face of these people who care about and support you, you should become stronger and more grateful.

When signing, many readers ask for a photo and shake hands. In the afternoon, a very tall and strong man asked to take a photo with me. After a passionate and encouraging speech, he asked for a handshake. Of course I smiled and held out my hand to him. Who knows, this guy-maybe he didn't work hard at all, but he was born with divine power. I almost cried out in pain when I squeezed it gently. At least I managed to hold back, and then my right hand was not neat all afternoon, and I was shocked to see the reader sticking out.

At the signing ceremony in Tianjin, there were actually two Korean girls in line, who looked about 20 years old and looked like students. They spoke ordinary Chinese and each bought a book. A young man from China behind them said to me, "These two are Koreans!" I'm surprised. I carefully signed their names and asked them curiously, "Will you take a fancy to the documents?" But they didn't seem to understand and smiled shyly. More than a dozen signing parties, this is the first time I have met a foreign friend.

Joining us is unforgettable.

What makes me particularly grateful is that readers and fans have specially given gifts to my daughter at almost every signing activity. Toys, books, sweets and clothes are all designed and there are many cards filled with blessings. Some readers also specially brought my first book "Wrong Football" published in 2000, which was signed at that time. At a time like this, I think it's

I have been content all my life, and this career has not been done in vain.

Step 2 talk about campus

& lt/strong & gt； Campus trip is an activity that I went to colleges and universities to communicate with students at the invitation of TOM Sports and universities around the world. This is a purely public welfare activity. In the past year, I went to ten universities, including Beijing Foreign Studies University, Xinjiang Agricultural University, Southwestern University of Finance and Economics and Zhejiang University, and I went to Tsinghua in the second half of this year. Every campus lecture received an excellent response, and the scene was packed and the atmosphere was warm. In the communication with college students, I "foolish old man moves mountains" and "don't? Promote my understanding of sports like Don Quixote, call for attention to sports, and answer their strange questions at the same time. Today's students are not the students we were at school. I obviously feel that exercise plays a smaller role in their lives. This makes me feel worried and embarrassed when I sit on the high platform. In the first half of the year, on the way to the signing ceremony, I returned to my alma mater, high school affiliated to nanjing normal university, and found that the records of the 800m and1500m in the school sports meeting were actually held by my seniors who were two years older than me, while the records of100m and 200m were set by my classmates 20 years ago. It may be that the sports achievements of our time were too good, or that the sports level of middle school students is too poor now. I said in my speech that sports and sportsmanship are lacking in the current educational environment.

The baton of the college entrance examination directly determines our society's choice of music, art and sports. The students sighed in unison below: "We don't have time to take part in physical exercise!" ""too much homework! " "Teachers and parents won't let us play football! "I used to advocate sportsmanship with my partner on TV programs. Sports spirit is first of all fair competition, chivalry, team spirit, respect for rules and so on. Specifically, as long as everyone tries their best, it is the best harvest. You don't have to compete with the world champion or the fastest runner. For example, playing football does not necessarily surpass Ronaldinho. As long as you play better than yesterday, you will be very happy. Sports is a form of fitness games and entertainment that comes into being and develops with the progress of human civilization. It is sublimated into a part of competitive sports and education in modern times, an important means to cultivate a sound personality and a language for people to communicate in social activities. For me, sports life is not a victory or a failure, not a spectator, but a part of life.

On June 65438+ 10/8, 2006, when I was giving a speech in Tsinghua University, a student host asked me, "What are you going to do if you stop explaining this industry one day?" Then he said, "Please look back at the big screen. On the right is Mourinho. He changed from a translator to the best coach. " Did he ask me if I want to be a football coach in the future? I didn't give a direct answer, but said, "This kind of thing is unlikely in China. Because every industry has a circle, this circle is not easy to accept outsiders. Besides, I don't want to be in such a hurry with them. It is urgent enough to say that the ball is urgent enough, and it is even more urgent to be a coach. Mourinho is an example for all people when they encounter setbacks in employment: a translator can become the highest-paid football coach in the world. So what major to study is not necessarily related to what to do in the future. However, what you have learned and what skills you have are the most important. " The students clapped at once.

Mourinho is certainly a strange man. However, there was another one before him-Maturana, who was later honored as the godfather of Colombian football. He used to be a reporter for the biggest newspaper in Colombia. Because he always writes articles criticizing the national team, people in the football world say, "Well, you can do it if you want." Unexpectedly, he really did it, and it was very successful. 1990 and 1994 brought Colombia to the World Cup twice. Colombia once beat Argentina 5-0 away! Not many people beat Argentina by such a big score. Finally forced Argentina to play the play-offs. Argentina invited Diego Diego Maradona to break out of Australia, and Australia only won 1: 0. ...

When I suddenly remembered chatting with my father, I said, "When we have money, buy him a football team!" " "

3. The speed of Germany

Germany, Italy World Cup, and three minutes of "crazy explanation", there is nothing to say. I've said everything I should, and I've said everything I shouldn't. Not only I said it, but also newspapers, TV and the Internet ... all over China and even abroad. If anyone appreciates this explanation, I want to thank them. If someone hates it, I have nothing to say.

That's right.

Why is this happening? I can only say that it's not me, it's "soul possession"

The leader of this World Cup broadcast arranged for me to stay in Berlin for a long time. During this period, I spent 14 days in Germany. Each long journey lasts from seven to eight hours to more than ten hours, with 23 round trips and live lectures 19. From June 6 to July 5, when I arrived in Berlin, I only knew the railway station, hotels, stadiums and highways in Berlin. I didn't have a little time to visit Berlin until the semi-final on July 5. Because of the intense broadcast and uninterrupted "travel", everyone is very tired. In addition to physical exertion, we should also do a good job of desk work before the game. When you arrive at the scene, you must concentrate on the game and watch the game in other venues during the break to prepare for the later explanation. After so many days of hard work, people are exhausted and weakened. Every time I go back to the hotel, I don't even have the strength to tidy up myself. My body is like a bag full of sand. I jumped into bed and fell asleep immediately.

The intense work makes people have no time to care about other things. Because football commentary is a kind of high-intensity and high-risk mental work. If you don't get the necessary rest and preparation, the quality of the explanation is difficult to guarantee. But in order to work and take care of the overall situation, I only revealed the pain of "being overwhelmed" to my family on MSN. My mother sent me a text message encouraging me to "persist, persistence is victory!" " "One day, I received a short message about my daughter on the train: I haven't seen her for weeks, and my daughter misses her father. Emotions are easily broken and it is difficult to control yourself.

Due to excessive fatigue, I also made some rare mistakes in previous competitions, such as misreading the players. I solemnly apologize. This is my first apology at the World Cup. But I believe many fans have forgotten. Next is the group match between Italy and the Czech Republic. Czech coach brukner looks like Gandalf in the movie The Lord of the Rings, while Italian coach Lippi looks like the legendary Hollywood superstar Paul who took off in a hot air balloon at the age of 80. Newman. Did this Gandalf warn Paul? Newman's game was tense and sad. When Inzaghi took the ball over the lonely and helpless Cech and forced it to the goal, Cech climbed on the ground to make a final effort to intercept the ball at Inzaghi's feet with his hand, but it was always a little short. I almost cried for a generation of indomitable and unlucky Czech warriors. I remembered the European Cup final of 1996 that I explained. At that time, the Czech team, like me at that time, was a rookie and famous all over the world. It has been ten years since then. My language is like the Volta River (the largest river in the Czech Republic, with the name of which the great Czech musician Bedrich Smetana once wrote a masterpiece), flowing naturally, for the Czech Republic, for Nedved and for football! Many TV viewers burst into tears in an instant, which is clearly confirmed in my mobile phone messages, messages on many websites and football comments. However, puzzling and slightly sad, what did I say at that time? I don't remember it myself, and not many viewers will remember it. People only remember the mood at that time. This is the biggest helplessness of the sports commentary industry. At the last moment of the game, I stood in the comment box of Hamburg Stadium, watching Nedved and Poposki say goodbye and watching them wave and high-five with Czech fans in the stands. Somehow, it suddenly occurred to me that if one day, when I said goodbye, what kind of scene would it be?

My sudden "outburst" in the last three minutes of the match between Italy and Australia was totally unnecessary. At that time, the stadium and the comment seats were very noisy, and I was surrounded by the comment seats of European media such as Italian radio and TV stations. Live commentary is completely different from watching the game in front of TV. It's a bit like talking at the neck in a noisy disco. I suddenly felt my throat was broken, so I had to shout harder. As for what was specifically said, I didn't remember it at all after shouting. If there weren't so many versions of detailed records on the Internet, I couldn't completely recall my own language.

If you look at the explanations and comments of the whole broadcast, they are not taken out of context. I think my analysis and comments on the skills and tactics of both sides are objective, fair and accurate. This commentary is clear in content, accurate in analysis and judgment, rich in information and accurate in application. Except for a little loss of voice, it seems that a musician improvises when he is extremely excited. Whether you agree or not, Crazy Commentary has been recorded in the history of sports commentary in China and has become a classic. This also makes sports commentary, a seemingly dispensable business, attract unprecedented attention from the whole society. Just because the tone is too high at the last moment, the voice is torn, which makes people feel that there are extreme emotions in the voice. Later, I listened to audio on the Internet and often asked myself, "Is that voice mine?" As for the accused "Long live Italy", in that case, it obviously means "Long live Italian football", which is expressed in the specific environment on the football field.

Afterwards, many people asked me, including my closest people, what was going on, and I couldn't answer. If I knew why I said this, I wouldn't say it. It's like why Zidane has to top Materazzi. Why? Zidane doesn't know, or he can only give some "not completely necessary" external conditions. No one knows what suddenly popped up in his clever head. Even he can't explain it himself.

There is another explanation, which I gave when I faced the innocent eyes of the students on the sacred podium in Tsinghua University: Maybe something was flying over the stadium in Kaiserslautern, Germany on June 26th, watching the game: aliens? UFO？ Or invisible superman? Or the Italian god? Perhaps it was his arrangement that Grosso, as a left-back, magically appeared in the opponent's penalty area at the last moment. After winning the penalty, after Totti's penalty, he originally wanted to cut off the throat of the Italian TV commentator around me, cheer the victory with a mortal voice, and shout out the pleasure of his prank, but he caught the wrong person because of panic or excitement. He grabbed my head and said, come on, go on. ...

Then, the world fell into chaos. He had enough fun and ran away. I apologized. ...

This is just a sports competition. Technically, what I want to review is to have a better grasp. Later, as soon as the phone was connected, I said, "I am a person, not a machine …" So someone immediately confused these two paragraphs and attacked me. You can't argue with these people with the "Cultural Revolution virus" in their heads, because they live in a twisted and abnormal world. Now I feel a little strange. When it happened, why did so many clever heads before and after the whole radio and television system make the worst decision instead of making the right choice? Is it really God's will? It's getting dark.

However, even the most serious things will pass, and there may be more serious things waiting to be challenged in the future. At that time, I thought about resigning, but later, with the help of leaders and colleagues, I persisted. Looking back now, if I had resigned at that time, I wouldn't have explained the next two quarterfinals, a semi-final and a final. Just like that, it has caused a great negative impact on CCTV, and I am most sorry for those fans who support and care about me. As for the explanations of these four games, I feel that after the so-called "explanation door" storm, I can still be so calm and so focused on my career. I can't say that I'm not handsome. Looking back at the "explanation punch line" extracted by netizens, I can't even believe that I have such a good psychological quality. And from a professional and technical point of view, the explanations of those four games, in my own opinion,

But now, isn't the resignation over? what can I do?

We won't know what is behind the mountain until it reaches the top.

4. The media is wrong

I used to be a media practitioner. Fortunately, most of my work is on-site commentary and some post-game comments. The characteristics of my job make it impossible for me to fabricate facts. However, counting this year, including before this year, I have been "willing" to become a party to fake news events countless times. The fakes in this world have different postures and different reasons. Some fake news is unintentional, because the makers are opportunists and spread false information. The other is that manufacturers have strange psychology and maliciously fabricate them for no reason. The former is mostly a product quality problem, more or less entertaining, while the latter is a crime like bin Laden's dirty bomb.

During the May Day signing in Qingdao, no one mentioned my "gossip girlfriend" in the interview, but the next day, some media actually said that my daughter and I were listening to "dolphin sounds" at home. This reporter's imagination is really rich; When I arrived in Hangzhou, due to the tight time and the arrangement of the local bookstore, I could not accept an exclusive interview with some media. As a result, the next day they tried their best to be sarcastic and said that I was playing big cards. If you read two newspapers in the same city that day, you will find that there are two diametrically opposite versions of the same thing and the same person. I have long been used to this black-and-white androgynous news. What can you do as a helpless individual? The times need the spirit of entertainment, so a so-called celebrity like me can only eat some dumb losses. Some people say that this special treatment is the price of being a "celebrity", and it can be regarded as making some contributions to society!

China's sports media, the so-called China Eight Thousand Footnotes, is more and more like an entertainment reporter, but it is actually not as good as the entertainment circle. First of all, this circle is not as competitive as the entertainment circle. Fierce competition will inevitably lead to the improvement of personal ability and quality, even if it is the level of fraud. Many football reporters go to play football without even knowing the basic tactical rules.

During the World Cup in Germany, a colleague met a foreign retired athlete at the stadium and took a group photo together, but the language was also unreasonable. With this photo, I made up a 3000-word interview. Journalists' tickets can't be sold, but someone sold them to foreign fans, and FIFA caught them with heavy penalties, and almost confiscated our broadcast seats and some interview tickets for later games.

In Germany, I met an China man who works for the British BBC, and an older brother. He said that some journalists in China were really shameful. Several people get together, and one person is on duty to write a manuscript every day. Everyone uses this manuscript to send to their own newspapers, and others go out to play. The man on duty is still not good at writing, making it up. He said that he met a domestic reporter to interview the Dutch team and talk about Dutch football. The best era of Dutch football is the Dutch Three Musketeers era. The man asked him, who is the Dutch Three Musketeers? This guy said he was ashamed, but, "This can only be said by us in China."

After the review, I lived in Berlin. At that time, there were one or two hundred German journalists from China. They all know that Huang Jianxiang lives in Berlin. If he is so gossipy and professional, he will stop at our hotel in Berlin. Even if I refuse to speak, at least I can take my photo and describe the real situation. This is also a real manuscript, so I don't have to pick up fake news on it. They would rather listen to hearsay, amplify and distort other people's fake news, and none of them came to me. And many people know the mobile phone I used in Germany, and no one called to ask me what happened. I've always wondered what these people think. This is a matter of professional ethics. I don't know where the tens of thousands of fake news about me came from.

In the months at the end of the year, the fake news about me was even more "crucian carp crossing the river" and "parallel bamboo is difficult to write" Whenever I see all this, my mind is like knocking over old vinegar salad and coffee. It is said that in the remote Bali where Trobe people live, planting sweet potatoes is a strange hobby of the local people, but none of the local people eat sweet potatoes because there are countless delicious and satisfying exotic fruits on the island. Trobe people piled sweet potatoes in the yard to show off, to see who piled them bigger, and then waited for them to rot. I believe that fake news is just like the sweet potato of the people of Bitrobrian-this kind of thing is worthless in itself. After showing off, let it wait quietly for the rotten fate.

5. Before resigning

In the end, despite the predictions of many professional critics, I resigned from CCTV-many people once wrote that I was a smart person and would not be stupid enough to give up the big tree of CCTV-hehe, if you can think of me, you will not be you, and I am not who I was a long time ago.

June 2006 165438+1October16, I left CCTV and my post where I worked 12 years ago. As said in "Resignation Letter", CCTV is a towering tree, and I am just a leaf on it. Every autumn when the wind blows, some leaves fall. And the tree is still tall and majestic. Immediately after this incident, there were comments that I had planned ahead, saying that I resigned in order to gain greater benefits and hype myself. Dare to ask, do any of you "hype" like me? How can a crow know Kun Pengzhi? I'm just a little crazy about those malicious counterfeiters and cybercriminals!

People are concerned about my resignation, probably because my employer is a national television station. The United States lost a soldier in Iraq, and the whole world will know immediately; Thousands of people died in the war of African indigenous tribes, which may be little known. The resignation of CCTV host is a big event every time. But my personal resignation, if there is no summer explanation, is really just a piece of cake. This is my deliberate life choice. It will not be beautiful because of the hype of the media, nor will it add any insider because of the so-called news of the media. There is no right or wrong about it, because I didn't hurt anyone.

As for the resignation, you have learned enough information from various media, including the detailed video conversation on my personal official website, so I won't say much. However, I want to talk about the small fragments left in my mind before I resigned, especially my last few "performances" on the CCTV stage, which are very precious to me. Fortunately, it is recorded in my blog or collected by enthusiastic netizens.

"I have a ten-year CCTV dream and a football commentary name."

After many years, maybe all this will still be vivid. I want to thank myself, because I love my job so much, and I love sports and football so much that I regard it as my life and career. At least, during the 12 years I worked, I lived up to my conscience and tried my best. I am worthy of my love, and I have done my best. I can wave my sleeves, but I will definitely take away a cloud that belongs to me.

There was once a famous western playwright who wrote countless plays. Whenever he finishes writing a script, he will show it to his friends around him immediately. If his friends praise him unanimously, he will tear up the script and start over; Of course, the script unanimously criticized by friends is naturally not a good thing and will definitely be torn up. Dramatists insist that only those dramas that people love and hate are the most wonderful and worth spreading.

In fact, everyone is writing their own life script. The difference is that some people don't applaud, and some people are attracting attention.

Some people like me, others hate me, and I am equally grateful to them. Life is fair in the end. The people who can really help me out of the predicament, overcome myself and help me at the most critical time are the audience who really like sports and football. Only they know my value best, understand my heart best, recognize my personality best and appreciate my personality best. Even, I can feel that they are pinning their understanding and hope on me about life, humanity and emotion. I really no longer belong to myself, no longer represent myself, and I can't just live for myself. Their support and care, their tolerance and objectivity not only gave me the strength and courage to persist at the critical moment, but also gave me more, such as the wisdom and inspiration behind what I said-it will still be remembered many years later.

I'm not fighting alone! I am not alone!

Silent memory, adult game

The World Cup in Germany is a farewell party.