I still don't understand how Joffrey died.

Last April 19, entrusted by a fashion company, Kimi was interviewed in Renaissance Jinmao Hotel. The interview and makeup time agreed on that day was 9: 30 in the morning, which was actually rare. Most artists basically get up in the afternoon when they have no work, so the interview time is usually after 2 o'clock. Kimi was not late that day. I still remember him walking into the hotel room on time wearing a white sweater and carrying a big guitar. Makeup, styling, photographer and I, as interviewers, are all in place, but the editor is late. But this does not affect that the whole work can be started immediately. But we are still waiting in the living room. His assistant told us that Kimi needs to practice yoga in the bedroom for a while, which is his habit. In addition to the big guitar, Kimi also carried a dazzling pink BOSE Bluetooth speaker. Slowly, deep meditation music came from the bedroom. I went to the bedroom door and took a look. He sat cross-legged on the bay window and didn't put himself in all the flexible yoga postures I imagined. Now, he has passed away from this world and announced that it is because of depression. So in retrospect, I may think that he just needed some time to force himself to adjust to a professional state suitable for filming and interviewing. Then, the makeup artist began to make up. I asked the staff around him if he could interview while wearing makeup, which would save time, and he immediately agreed. He moved the iPhone I used to receive the radio to him again. Throughout the interview, Kimi's closest place is not only this place, nor just me, but everyone around him. This is not Luo Zhi's praise for the dead afterwards. In the past, he had a reputation of being considerate of people around him, but that time, I really felt that he was considerate of others-not that you neglected his star status, but that he often forgot it himself. After the interview began, he still refused to turn off the meditation music. Listen to the tape now, feminine music is really scary. Last year, he actually completed the transformation from a hand to an actor. Although many TV plays he participated in are not the first leading role, they are all big productions with guaranteed ratings. The night of my interview was the first broadcast day of his love TV reality show "Let's Love". The topic we talked about naturally began with this screen love. "Libra is very cheap, not to say that warm men, but that he likes to wait on others, and M inside has a tendency to be abused. This has nothing to do with warmth. " Listen to the interview recording in the memo again. I'm really shocked to hear that. I wonder if he described his role of sacrificing himself to take care of others in love as Libra in other interviews. After his death, there were rumors about it. Perhaps this is a coincidence with a little black humor. Before my interview, Kimi had just returned from filming in Italy. He went to Verona, the hometown of Romeo and Juliet, and jumped an umbrella. "Where the rice is, there is no oxygen, weightlessness, falling, cool, really cool." He said that he not only danced by himself, but also forced the makeup artist and assistant to dance. In Italy, which he thought was like heaven, Kimi accomplished more with great enthusiasm. In the subsequent interview, he also mentioned that he was doing yoga in front of Milan Cathedral, and he could sit on the floor and play guitar whenever he was tired. He also went to the cinema in Milan to see the Italian version of Speed and 7. He even went to the San Siro to watch a home game of AC Milan. As for nightlife, Kimi also told me unreservedly that he took his agent and stylist to the hottest nightclub in Milan, "with an inspection mentality". He said with a smile that he found that the music and environment of Milan nightclubs were actually similar to those in China, the only difference being that the DJ was particularly handsome. He stood at the DJ's table and recorded crazily. In the end, DJ misunderstood homosexuality and almost got kicked out of the nightclub. No one will think that such a person who is full of interest in life will be a depressed person. At least, there should be no more. In the second half of the interview, he did mention to me that he had been troubled by depression, and yoga was also to control his emotions. But hands and actors are stressful jobs and many people have emotional problems. Kimi said this, no one will think it is too special. This may be the place where depression is extremely lethal, and people can't have the same empathy for mental illness and physical illness. As for insomnia and depression, his exact words are as follows (we were talking about what kind of friends he is surrounded by now): My friends are quite miscellaneous, including musicians, photographers, lighting engineers during filming and recording engineers. Oh, I went to India for a yoga class, and I was a recording engineer for one of my plays. She is one of my senior sisters. She introduced me. During that time, I was particularly depressed and anxious, and I couldn't sleep well. I shared this with me. If he really suffers from depression when we can't see him, then it is certain that he must have redeemed himself many times and struggled for "life". On the plane back from Frankfurt, I also did a whole set of yoga. He told me so. Then I asked him: Have you ever been afraid of being unpopular? I also tried to analyze the causes of his depression, at least on the surface, to see if his career made him anxious. Kimi's answer is easy: if it's not popular, I'll go back to Shanghai. I studied numerical control, and studied in the Institute of Electrical Engineering. I thought I would go to Mitsubishi Elevator or Shanghai Volkswagen in the future. I haven't touched the parts since I entered the business, but if I have to try again, I think it should be wonderful. In this interview and his tone at that time, I don't think he is a person who is too eager for fame and status. He is not an artist who has never experienced a trough. I joked with him that he had experienced a U-shaped career curve since the debut of My Hero. The rest of the time, we mainly talk about people he likes. Among his songs, Yoga Lin is the most, and he appreciates a little emotion in his singing. At that time, Hunan Satellite TV was still showing my hand, and he also admitted that he liked Li Jian very much. In addition, he also mentioned that his male god is Gao, and he watched it all the way from Xiao Shuo to Xiao Song Qi Tan, including Qi Pa Shuo, which was being broadcasted at that time. Kimi said that he himself is a very argumentative person, and of course he is also argumentative in putting facts and reasoning. I feel that I can't get along with the guests of "Seven Ba Shuo" and can be a live audience. The clue of depression in the conversation passed away. After these hobbies are exposed, people can no longer associate him with depression. Perhaps insomnia, depression and anxiety have troubled him, just as ordinary people are emotionally disturbed by work pressure. He should welcome his own spring on the screen now, even though he still has his initial heart as a starting point. I think so, too, but at the end of the interview, I asked him what he knew about this circle after he debuted in 1978. He replied thoughtfully: "It's still more direct, more pure, not virtual, fake, and now it's the era of big data." This is a sentence that omits the subject. Today, a year later, I found my negligence. Why don't I ask who or what I want to be more direct and pure? Or the moment when he allowed himself to be serious in front of the interviewer was short. In a flash, he smiled and said to me, "Why do I speak so seriously today?" I am really funny at ordinary times. "This is the only time I have seen Jimmy. During the interview, we had a pause when he painted eyeliner. " You can't talk when you draw eyeliner. Please wait for me. "So I stopped asking questions and sat quietly waiting for him. He turned on the Bluetooth speaker again. This time it's European and American pop music with a strong sense of rhythm. I think I should see him in many places or on TV in the future. After all, he told me firmly at that time: "It is a good time to be an actor after the age of 28 and early 30. I think I can choose more roles at that time. "But he stopped his life when he was 1 month short of 29 years old. And I always feel that he is still asking us to wait for him, just like his habit of wearing eyeliner and not talking. He was shaking his feet to the music and wearing cute striped socks. Soon, he opened his eyes again, and he vowed to tell me that when he had accumulated enough, he would try stage plays and dramas. " Rehearsal every day, each rehearsal can cost hundreds of dollars, and each performance can cost thousands of dollars. Follow the tour and put on a play. Maybe in the 70th scene, you will get a taste of acting. I thought that one day in the future, I would really see him in a small theater.