About the wedding in Xinzhou, Shanxi

Xinzhou Marriage Customs

Marriage is the most solemn event in life rituals. It marks a person's farewell to his teenage years and enters an important stage of starting a family, establishing a career, and developing a family. Therefore, weddings have always been valued by people. While following the ancient "six rites", weddings in Xinzhou have gradually become simpler over time and have the characteristics of the region.

The marriage process in Xinzhou generally has four steps: marriage negotiation, engagement, marriage, and return.

Marriage negotiation is the initial stage of marriage between a man and a woman. In the old days, "no marriage without a matchmaker", men and women could not meet each other, everything depended on the wishes of their parents, and whether they could get married depended entirely on the outcome of the "combined marriage". Later, blind dates were added. The method was for the introducer to take the man to the woman's house to see her appearance and figure. The woman's father, or the woman and her mother sometimes go to the man's house to look at his house and apartment and inquire about his social connections. After the marriage is completed, the two families choose an auspicious day to exchange Geng Tie. Both parties prepare red stickers, on which the dates of birth of the male and female parties are written again, and exchange them with each other to express their unswerving commitment. As the local saying goes, the woman "has a master." Later, as people got rid of superstition and eliminated the "marriage" link, the "exchange of stickers" procedure was also eliminated.

Engagement. The core content of engagement in the old days was that they were well-matched, and age did not matter. Engagement is usually done before the age of 15, or even as early as five or six years old. Some young boys marry older wives, and some older sons-in-law marry younger girls, but usually the girl is older than the boy. When getting engaged, the groom's family will give betrothal gifts and large sums of money to the bride's family, which was formerly known as "Napin". All gifts are designated by the bride’s family. For example, the betrothal gifts in Baode and Hequ areas include "three plates and two pairs", that is, three pairs of necklaces and two pairs of bracelets; "flower red betrothal gift", which is one foot and two feet of red cloth and blue cloth; and "raw rice and pig rolls", which is one A dou of white rice, a dou of mung beans, a dou of red dates, a bite of white-striped pig, 24 steamed buns, and yinyang wrapped in red paper. The daughter-in-law's family only gave symbolic gifts to her son-in-law, such as a hat, a pair of boots, and a "hard waist." Before liberation, most poor families could not afford the bride price, so they had to pawn their houses and sell their land, racking up so much debt that they would not be able to turn over for the rest of their lives. There is also a custom near Baodechengguan called "Eating Watermelon Mooncakes for Three Years", that is, within three years after the engagement, every Mid-Autumn Festival, the man will carry four large watermelons in a food box, and build a tower of large and small mooncakes for the woman. . In the Hequ area, before the wedding, the girl's family will be given 24 fried pancakes of two kilograms of flour, 120 pancakes, one sheep, one pig, and two pots of wine.

Getting married is also called getting married. When both men and women reach the marriage age recognized by the local area, the man and woman will negotiate the date of marriage. Generally, the man's family first asks Mr. Yin and Yang to choose a date, and the introducer brings a gift and informs the woman's family. Generally, the woman's family agrees with the date of the man's family. But the attentive girl's family will also ask Mr. Yin and Yang to adjust the days to see if there are any "hinders". In the Baode area, after the 23rd of the twelfth lunar month, you can choose any day, which is called "rushing in chaos".

Get married. After the wedding date is determined, both parties start preparations, notifying relatives and friends first. Generally, every family has to order a sedan chair and hire musicians. On the wedding day, the groom rides in a sedan chair, wears a formal dress and a red cross. The groomsmen accompany the bride to the bride's home with drum music. If a poor family cannot afford to hire a sedan, they use a donkey to pick up the bride, which is commonly known as "Mingmo". In some places, because the mountain roads are far away and rugged, they use a special means of transportation called "mule-loaded sedan chair" to get married. That is, a long sedan chair is tied between two poles, and two mules carry it one behind the other. "Mule drivers" dressed in black and with white towels on their heads drive the animals, which is both stable and safe and saves manpower. The person who sent the bride off did not return on the same day. After the wedding team arrives at the bride's side, the bride's brother goes out to greet the bride in Dai County and "puts happy flowers" on the groom's head. After the groom enters the hospital, he has to drink tea and eat dried fruit snacks, which is called "waiting for his son-in-law". In the Hequ area, the son-in-law was treated to a "small meal" - four plates of side dishes, noodles, and shochu. After the meal, the bride is urged to get on the sedan chair. The bride wears a phoenix crown on her head, a Xia pei, a jade belt around her waist, and a red silk hijab, and goes out with the groom. At this time, the bride was crying, and the mother's cheeks were filled with tears. Mother and daughter were inseparable, and they even cried holding each other's hands. The girl's family takes advantage of this to make some small conditions, which is customarily called "the adopted daughter's first blow". The boy's family gives some money, flour or meat, which is called "Li Niang's fee", "Li Niang's noodles", and "Li Niang's meat". After noon, the bride got into the sedan chair and set off. When the wedding team returned home, they set off firecrackers first. Then light a fire in front of the gate. The bride-to-be will invite the bride-to-be into the room to entertain the bride. The bride cannot step on the mud when she gets off the sedan, and the bride-to-be will be carried by the bride-to-be or walked into the courtyard on a felt. When the bride comes in, her aunts and aunts, who are the same age as her mother-in-law, will rub black on her mother-in-law's face and rub red on the bride's face. In Lan County, people used to smear their father-in-law's face for good luck. When worshiping, the order of "three halls inside and three halls outside" is to worship heaven and earth first, then ancestors, then parents, and then elders, relatives and friends of the same clan. They cannot be reversed at will. After the greetings, the bride and groom enter the bridal chamber, the bride sits facing the wall, and the groom removes the red gauze covering her head. In some places, a flower on the bride's head is placed at the highest point of the bridal chamber. Folk songs include "Putting flowers on the wall will bring you a baby", "Put it high and raise it early, and you will have a fat little one next year." In the Hequ area, after the groom chooses a head covering, he will comb the bride's hair a few times, and then use the new hairpin given by her husband's family to change the bun into a net head, commonly known as "top head", which means that the woman will be his from now on. Wife. Then use the bows and arrows in the Eight Immortals Table Fight to shoot into the four corners of the bridal chamber, thinking that it can drive away evil spirits and bad luck. The bride should measure it with a ruler on a piece of red cloth and cut it with scissors, which means that she will be good at sewing and weaving and live a good life after marriage.

Pregnant women and widows are prohibited from entering the bridal chamber. Playing with the bride and having fun in the bridal chamber at night is commonly known as "nothing will happen within three days". The whole wedding was joyful and lively.

Go back to the door. On the second day after the wedding, in some places it is the fifth or ninth day, when the bride and groom return to the bride's house, the groom must kneel down and worship the elders of his father-in-law's family, which is commonly known as "recognizing the eldest and the smallest". In the Baode area, uncles and aunts often try to make fun of their brothers-in-law by adding extra seasonings to their meals, such as chili, vinegar, Sichuan peppercorns, etc. The bridegroom is also given a meal of dumplings, which is called "kneading his mouth and flattening his mouth" to prevent the son-in-law from saying anything bad. On the same day, the bride and groom must return to the groom's house and are not allowed to stay at their parents' house. This is called "calling back and forth". At this point, the whole process of the wedding is over.