How to treat the mother-in-law asking for nanny fees because she is dissatisfied with her daughter-in-law's childbirth?

Some people say that marriage is the grave of people who don't want to pay; For those who know the meaning of love, it is heaven.

What do couples need most in marriage? It is not a rich material life, nor a passionate passion, but a long-flowing love, mutual respect and understanding.

If marriage is only between husband and wife, many problems and contradictions in marriage can be solved. After all, two people can get married, which shows that there is a certain emotional foundation.

But the reality is that marriage is never about two people, but the running-in of two families. This undoubtedly adds great difficulty to the management of marriage.

Between families, due to the large number of people and the family environment, the three views are inconsistent, and it is easy to get along with contradictions. We know that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is one of the most representative contradictions arising from the integration of two families.

In a marriage, if there are contradictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, this marriage is undoubtedly difficult to be happy. As long as the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law arises, it will be too difficult to eliminate. It's like a chronic disease. Once started, it is difficult to cure.

-02-

In my opinion, instead of solving the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, we should learn how to avoid it. Eliminate the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law from the source. As the saying goes, it is better to bottom out the soup than to boil it.

Many people will feel helpless if they want to prevent the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, because the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is sudden. How can we predict in advance what will cause the contradiction between two people?

Actually, I have a relatively simple method here. We might as well think about why there are contradictions and frictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

In fact, it is very simple, because the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along for a long time and are not used to each other's lifestyle and consumption concept, and conflicts will arise over time.

Can you think that this contradiction will not happen if the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along for a short time?

Facts have proved that this view is correct. The easiest way to avoid the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not to live together for a long time.

Will it be a surprise? But what I want to say is that in fact, some things are not complicated, but we have artificially complicated it. With the most primitive and simple ideas, you can probably find a solution.

-03-

Neighbor Xiaoying and a group of people are newlyweds. On weekdays, they go out in pairs and look very loving.

Because we are neighbors, we will get to know each other after a while. I learned that Xiaoying was 26 and a group of people were 27. They are college classmates and a group of them are Xiaoying's seniors. During college, two people fell in love.

After graduation, the two chose to stay in the city. Xiaoying is a local, and a group of them are from other places. Two people moved in together after they got a job. After working for two years, they got married.

Because of their emotional foundation, their married life is very sweet.

About a year later, Xiaoying became pregnant. In order to take good care of Xiaoying, a group of people specially took her mother from her hometown and said that they could take care of Xiaoying.

Xiaoying had intended to let her mother take care of her. After all, her mother is here, and not far away. A Gang pulled her mother-in-law all the way, and Xiaoying felt sorry for her fatigue.

But since her mother-in-law is here, Xiaoying can't say much. She cleaned up the room and let her mother-in-law live in it.

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My mother-in-law is also very happy this time. After all, the daughter-in-law is pregnant and can see her son. Taking care of Xiaoying is actually not tiring at all. Xiaoying just got pregnant and didn't respond much. I can do most things by myself on weekdays. Mother-in-law's arrival is just cooking every day.

Xiaoying respects her mother-in-law very much and often buys her some clothes and other gifts. The mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along well.

Xiaoying's mother-in-law always walks in the community on weekdays, and after a while she gets acquainted with other old people in the community. She often praises her son in front of others. I can see that she loves her son very much.

Moreover, she will talk about her daughter-in-law's pregnancy, and her mouth is full of joy: "My daughter-in-law is pregnant, and I can have grandchildren in a few months!" The old people next to her are envious of her.

But once, when she was chatting with other old people, an old man said that his daughter-in-law had a granddaughter, which was very cute. Xiaoying's mother-in-law curled her lips after hearing this, and even said, "This girl is the spilled water. This is a loss-making product. Sooner or later, it will be someone else's, or a good grandson. Grandsons can carry on the family line. "

It seems that Xiaoying's mother-in-law has some preference for boys. Of course Xiaoying doesn't know about it.

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Finally, Xiaoying was born in the eighth month after her mother-in-law came. To her mother-in-law's disappointment, Xiaoying gave birth to a daughter. This makes her son preference somewhat unacceptable.

My mother-in-law took a 180-degree turn towards Xiaoying, and her attitude was very bad. She also swore at Xiaoying. Xiaoying was puzzled at first. Finally, knowing that her mother-in-law prefers boys to girls, Xiaoying is also somewhat dissatisfied.

And since Xiaoying gave birth to a child, her mother-in-law has never taken care of her. My mother-in-law sighed all day at home, complaining that Xiaoying had a daughter and couldn't hold her grandson.

Xiaoying looked at the son-in-law and was very angry. The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law gradually deteriorated, and the two began to quarrel.

On that occasion, Xiaoying quarreled with her again because her mother-in-law scolded her daughter for losing money. Xiaoying yelled at her mother-in-law when she was excited: "You don't have to worry about my daughter. You will go back to my hometown tomorrow, not at my home! "

Not to be outdone, my mother-in-law said, "This is my son's house and my home. What's the matter, you gave birth to a money-losing product and still don't let people talk? "

-06-

After a while, her mother-in-law found Xiaoying again and asked her to give money. Xiaoying asked angrily what money it was. My mother-in-law even said, "I care about your money. I was going to have you give me a grandson, so I don't want money. " But you gave birth to a loser, and I want money these months. I looked it up online. I'm working for Yue Yue. I'll take care of you for eight months, 10 thousand a month, you give me 80 thousand, and I'll leave tomorrow "

Xiaoying was shaking with anger. She has never seen such an unreasonable mother-in-law. She immediately called Kong and told him about it.

Just after Ah Gang came back, she began to complain that her mother had gone too far and her mother-in-law was still adamant. A Gang said to his mother seriously, "Mom, I like my daughter very much. I hope you will stop insulting her and cursing Xiaoying in the future. I thought about it, too. Since you don't want to take care of Xiaoying, go back to your hometown. My dad must miss you. "

In this way, A simply sent her mother-in-law back to her hometown. Xiaoying just heaved a sigh. The contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law overwhelmed her. None of this would have happened if she had not lived with her mother-in-law.

In fact, many times, it is not necessary for mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to live together. Originally two families, why do you have to get together? It's easier said than done in a short time, and getting along with each other for a long time will inevitably lead to unnecessary contradictions.

The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is "the fragrance is far away and the taste is near", and the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law should maintain a sense of distance and boundary. Dealing with the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law also helps to strengthen marriage.