What are the differences between Malay and Malay-Chinese wedding customs?

1. Malay wedding customs:

Malay wedding customs are very unique. The wedding is held at the woman's home and lasts for a week, including the man bringing the betrothal gift to the woman's home to pick up the bride, the imam reciting sutras and blessings for the couple, and holding the couple's bathing ceremony and marriage ceremony. The main ceremonies are all held in the evening. After seven days, the groom can return to his home with his new wife and dowry.

When welcoming the bride, the man walks half way and the woman walks half way; the man should dress up like a dignitary and hold an umbrella to greet the bride happily; the woman should look sad because she has to stay away. Relatives and friends, so they are in a bad mood.

The climax of Malay weddings is the sitting ceremony. Two or three days before the sitting ceremony, there is also the ceremony of hair decoration and palm dyeing. The bride and groom each have a hairdresser. The situation is slightly different now when it comes to decorating their hair and making up. They don't like hair stylists much, and they often go to the beauty salon to ask beauticians to dress them up. The bride must take a bath after decorating her hair, which is said to have the effect of warding off evil spirits and avoiding disasters. .

There are three processes for dyeing palms: private dyeing, small dyeing and large dyeing. In fact, each ceremony is the same. The bride must participate in all the ceremonies, and the groom must do it at home. Participate in the private dyeing and minor dyeing ceremonies, and then go to the bride's house to participate in the major dyeing rituals. In recent years, Malays seem to be gradually abandoning the private dyeing and minor dyeing rituals, and only focus on the major dyeing rituals.

When the groom arrives at the bride's house, he please sit on the "sitting table". In front of the table is a copper plate with legs. In the center of the plate is a beautiful ball of henna paste, surrounded by three plates. There are yellow rice, baked rice and water mixed with crushed mountain ginger leaves. There is also a water spout made of fragrant leaves in the small dish.

The ceremony begins. , first of all, the male guest presided over the ceremony. An older guest stood in front of the "seating platform" and took a little yellow rice and sprinkled it on the groom's right shoulder, and then sprinkled some on his left shoulder. Then take some roasted rice and sprinkle it again like yellow rice. Then, he dipped a fragrant leaf water sprayer into some mountain ginger water and sprayed the backs of the groom's hands. Finally, he took a little henna and smeared it on the groom's palms. However, the groom's palms would not be stained because before dyeing his palms, his mother-in-law's agent immediately put two pieces of henna leaves on his palms. With his palms stained, the groom clasped his hands together and raised them to his chest to salute and thank the host.

All guests, regardless of gender, old or young, can take turns being the host. According to Malay custom, the male guest must preside over the ceremony first, and then it is the female guest's turn, and the number of people presiding must be an odd number, because the Malays believe that even numbers are unlucky. Although the Malays invite people from other ethnic groups to participate in various stages of the wedding ceremony, the non-Muslim believers are only allowed to observe the ceremony and cannot preside over it.

After the groom's ceremony is completed, he goes home first, accompanied by relatives and friends, and then the bride participates in the ceremony. The process of the ceremony is exactly the same as that of the groom. From the afternoon until midnight, the bride's house was packed with guests and singing. The noisy and joyful atmosphere left a deep impression on people.

The couple's "Sitting Side by Side Ceremony" is the climax of Malay marriage etiquette and customs. It is usually held in the afternoon of the last day of the marriage. The "Sitting Side by Side Ceremony" was not originally a part of the Islamic marriage ceremony. A ritual that gradually evolved under the influence of Hinduism.

The style of the "side-sitting platform" is very similar to the throne of the Malay Sultan. The platform is divided into three levels, the lowest level is about half a foot high, and the top level is about two feet high. Table 1 It is surrounded by embroidered silk and decorated with holiday lights. It is bright and colorful, and it is really beautiful. The top level of the station is where the newlyweds sit side by side, with soft cushions and colorful coats to match. Standing on it and looking down at the guests, it's no wonder that Malay friends say that a couple who "sitting side by side" is as noble as being a king.

It is held at the bride's house. Relatives and friends invited to attend the ceremony arrive early and bring gifts: rice, oil, eggs, flour, as well as cups, plates, cloth or cash. The careful owner must entrust loyal relatives to register and give gifts to relatives and friends on his behalf. In this way, if the guest’s daughter gets married in the future, the gift he will give in return will be richer than the gift he received, so that the bride will not be rude.

Wearing gold and silver jewelry, she walked slowly out of the bridal chamber under the guidance of an elderly relative. She closed her eyes slightly and lowered her pink head, showing an infinitely shy look. "Sit on the stage", Zuo Mai is sitting on the stage. The bride still lowers her head and closes her eyes, shyly. In the Malay concept, this is a sign of chastity and the most precious sentiment of women.

Basically The weddings of most of their young people also require wedding arrangements. In the countryside, you may set up a stage at home, but this "sitting on the stage" is more unique. Brunei is also an Islamic state, and many of them are basically similar to Malays. So the princess and the consort also sit on the stage together!

2. Malay Chinese wedding customs

Most Chinese in Malaysia come from Guangdong, Fujian, Hakka, Chaozhou and other places, and they also have Some different wedding customs. On the day of the Chinese wedding:

In the morning, the groom will go to the bride’s house to pick up the bride (at an auspicious time on the day). After that, the couple will serve tea to the bride’s parents and elders. The bride is taken to the bride's home. The bride and groom offer tea to the groom's parents and elders. In some places, it is common for Chinese weddings to give a red envelope as a sign of good luck.

There is no specific standard for gift money. Usually a person who comes to participate can get 100 MYR. If it is a good friend, 200-1000 MYR is available. It just depends on your own preference. "It's rarely like the thousands in China!

The above is the common marriage pattern of Malay-Chinese. The following is the personal experience of a Malay-Chinese daughter-in-law who just became a Malay-Chinese daughter-in-law:

In the morning, the groom chooses an auspicious day to come to the bride's house to pick up the bride

Serving tea to the bride's parents is the same as what is done in Shanghai now, but what follows is different

Receive the groom After returning home, the first thing to do is to worship the ancestors. The eldest son of the Chinese family usually has the memorial tablets of his ancestors, so before entering the house, he must first worship his ancestors. The husband will go to his uncle’s house to worship his ancestors.

Finally, the groom’s family arranged two special chairs, and then there was a round of tea serving. Their family wanted all relatives and elders, even sisters, to be present. For example, grandparents should sit down first, and we To serve them tea, uncles, aunts, sisters and brothers-in-law would line up and wait in the back in order of seniority. Of course, there would be red envelopes for the tea. In the past, gold items were more often given, but now the older generation also gives them, including the younger ones. Cash. In the old days, the older ones had to kneel down and offer tea, dear~~~ Everyone who is senior to me should do the same, dear~~~ It means entering their house. , No disrespect! JMS has already said that this is not a big deal, and I don’t think it is a big deal. However, for the sake of those gold and silver jewelry and red envelopes, I can bear it.

It’s almost too late after the big tea ceremony is over, so go to the hotel and wait for the banquet to start! Malaysian Chinese wedding banquets usually start from 6:30 to 7:30 in the evening. Celebration ceremony. There are usually 6-8 dishes in a wedding banquet. Only one dish is served at a time, and the next dish is served after the meal is finished, followed by the main meal, dessert and sweet water.

Before the wedding wine, there is still a sign-in ceremony, and everyone still has to prepare a red envelope to represent the gift of the wedding wine!

After dinner, they usually disperse, but friends who are close to young people may get together later, and everyone goes out to renew their stalls or something, but they are usually exhausted, so when they come back It’s too late to count the red envelopes! This is basically the process of a Chinese wedding!