The mother gave her child a birthday at home, and the child lifted the table because it was not high enough.

Recently, a friend and her son had a quarrel at home because of their birthday.

The reason is that this friend just bought a new house and spent a lot of money. He thought it would be good to simply give the child a birthday, so he invited us to her house for dinner.

Unexpectedly, just as she was about to blow out the candle, her 8-year-old son directly overturned the table and then shouted angrily at her friend.

"My classmate's birthday invited the whole class to a luxury hotel for dinner. Why can't our family? My birthday is so casual, or my biological parents? "

To tell you the truth, I'm quite shocked.

Since when does it make sense to go to luxury hotels for children's birthdays? Since when can parents only satisfy their children unconditionally?

Of course, this kind of thing that happened at a friend's house is not a case. Last year, some media reported that some places began to hold birthday banquets for children, and a table of banquets cost tens of thousands or hundreds of thousands.

There are dozens of tables, abalone, sea cucumber, oysters, salmon and other precious dishes are readily available, plus a bottle of white wine for thousands of dollars, a table of banquets is tens of thousands, more than my monthly salary.

In addition, some parents will ask special planning companies to help them plan the whole birthday celebration carefully, and even hire photographers or film and television companies to shoot the whole process.

To tell the truth, as a teacher, I personally hate this extravagant style. But looking back, why is this luxurious birthday party welcomed by primary school students?

I think parents may have the most say, just like some parents I have contacted. They think that children will be looked down upon by their classmates if they don't do it themselves. what

Only under the so-called face of these people, some parents began to lose their sense of autonomy, and the wind of comparison intensified.

But then again, is it the child's fault to compare with others? Of course not. All faults are the fault of parents, because parents are the children's first teachers.

If parents spend all day at home discussing whose house is bigger and whose house is smaller, who spent more than 1 10,000 to buy a car, and who can't even afford a car, then children will imitate their parents and then compare with each other among classmates.

From the perspective of children's growth, if children's desire to compare with others is over-satisfied, their feelings and pursuit of growth and happiness will be cut off. The result is that children are self-centered in everything and lack the ability to think and judge independently.

Accurately speaking, it is not impossible to celebrate a child's birthday, just pay attention to the ways and means. For example, letting children do their own planning can not only exercise their hands-on ability, but also let them know how to share and respect others, which is far more meaningful than spending hundreds of thousands of yuan on a luxury banquet.

True wealth means that parents can give their children enough companionship, security and love, set an example to teach them the correct three views, and let them know clearly that true happiness has nothing to do with money.

Parents' excessive love for their children and unlimited satisfaction with their children's desires can only produce more and more grandchildren, more and more Wu and more Guo.

In this regard, I think this unhealthy trend of comparison needs to be corrected. Is there any support?

Brief introduction of the author

Wang Fang, born in 1980, is a primary school teacher in Haidian District, Beijing. Graduated from Beijing Normal University, and his masterpieces include Naughty Yang. Wang Fang is familiar with contemporary children's psychology and is good at organizing teaching activities according to the law of children's development. Many of her teaching papers have won first prizes in Beijing and many educational institutions.