Men who have this habit advise you not to marry, lest you fall into a trap. Do you remember this?

01

Recently, my best friend complained to me that her marriage was unhappy.

I feel regretful and distressed at the same time. In fact, I had known that such a day would come, and I had advised her to break up as soon as possible, but she refused to listen, and now she regrets it endlessly.

Let’s tell her story.

My best friend is young and beautiful, and there are many boys pursuing her, but she just likes the man who is 10 years older than her. Let’s call him uncle for now. I have no prejudice against older men, and besides, I am an unmarried uncle.

Last year, my best friend took me to meet my uncle. He was energetic, well-educated, and his family background was not bad. Overall, he could be rated 90 points.

But I can’t stand the uncle’s behavior.

My best friend is a carefree girl who does things casually, but my uncle has a lot of rules. During the meal, my best friend ordered many of her favorite dishes, but many of them were crossed out by the uncle because he said those fried and spicy dishes were bad for the body and should not be eaten.

After dinner, we went shopping together. My best friend picked out several brightly colored casual clothes. They were actually quite beautiful and were also her best friend’s usual dressing style.

But the uncle shook his head and said: No, these are too ugly. You have to dress in a ladylike style to be suitable, and wearing ladylike and professional clothes will be more conducive to your current work.

Then, the uncle took his best friend to pick out several clothes that he thought looked good. The best friend also compromised. After all, the uncle paid the bill, and what the uncle said seemed to make sense.

However, I feel that something is wrong. This uncle is too controlling. He even has so many requirements for things like eating and dressing. What will I do after getting married?

After that time, I reminded my best friend that you should think carefully and think clearly, are you willing to be asked this and that by this man for the rest of your life?

My best friend, who was carried away by love, couldn't listen. She retorted: Everything the uncle said makes sense. He is doing it for my own good. If I leave him, where can I find a man who cares about me so much? .

02

Later, they got married smoothly. I went to attend their wedding. It was very grand. Seeing the happiness on my best friend’s face, I felt relieved.

Unexpectedly, half a year later, she came to me crying and told me that she really couldn’t stand my uncle because he had too many demands.

After getting married, the uncle told his best friend, "Stop working" and concentrate on preparing for pregnancy and childbirth at home. My best friend’s job is very good and she likes it very much. She doesn’t want to give up. She tried to communicate with her uncle, but he didn’t agree at all. He also said, “With your small salary, you can’t afford a better confinement nanny, so you might as well resign and stay at home.” Take care of the baby."

My best friend was deeply hurt by these words.

What’s even weirder is that the uncle is very filial, so he does everything he wants. He stipulates that he must go to his mother-in-law’s house every weekend to visit the two elderly people. Sometimes, my best friend wants to take a rest on the weekend, or go for an outing nearby with her uncle, but the uncle always disagrees, and then there are a lot of truths: parents are getting older, and they need to see each other less frequently. There will be more things like traveling in the future. Time to do it.

My best friend cried and told me that there were too many such things, and she regretted not listening to my advice before. She thought she had a happy marriage, but now she feels like she is in a cage, with no freedom. Word.

I can only sigh.

03

Why do you think men like uncle are not worth marrying?

Although he is excellent, he is not suitable for marriage. Because there are too many standards, requirements and restrictions in his world, which is destined to make the other half very tired.

Marriage is two people forming a family. Work has made us tired enough. After returning home, we hope to take a rest easily. If there are more rules at home than at the company, how can we live like this? Pass.

Although the uncle has his own explanation for everything, and he thinks his statement is right, in my opinion, there is no absolute right or wrong in relationships and marriage. It's the same thing, but different people have different views and practices.

Do our lovers care more about the right or wrong of something, or the feelings of the other half? If he cares about your true feelings and is not eager to argue about right or wrong, this is a sign that he loves you.

04

In the book "The Five Abilities of Love", the author said: Most people who want to control others and have a strong desire to control find it difficult to realize that they are For problems, they often need to resort to right and wrong, and are actually doing things to control others.

So, those people who only argue with you about right and wrong every day actually have a heart behind them that wants to control you. With such a person, if you comply, you will be manipulated, but if you resist, the two of you will quarrel again. So, no matter what, I won't be happy.

A truly happy marriage must be when two people live together in their own comfortable way. As long as their respective lifestyles do not harm the other, they should try their best to tolerate each other.