Is there anyone you think of with regret?

? I once heard someone say: "The biggest bankruptcy in life is despair." The person who said this is called Xu Xiaoan, who recently moved to my next door neighbor and is also my classmate. , he is tall, handsome, has excellent grades, and ranks first in his grade almost every year. If everyone can meet a genius, I think the person who passes by my life is him. You probably think he is a "nerd" , like all Sanhao students who study hard every day, if there is only study in life, you are wrong. At that time, Xiaoan was already a person who focused on "eating, drinking and having fun". Now you see him happy, confident, Treat others well without treating yourself badly.

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? You can hardly see him on campus, but if you go to the vegetable market, you will definitely find him; I have heard people say that he is different from ordinary people. There is also his past. In the past, Xiao An was a "bad boy" in everyone's eyes. He drank, skipped classes, fought, smoked, played games, said dirty words, and hung out with a group of "social youths" all day long. He lived his life almost every day. What makes Xiao An's game-based life different from ordinary people is that he has a young and beautiful mother with a bad temper.

Due to Xiao An's cynicism, he has been warned and punished three times by the school. The school has called his mother countless times and informed his mother that if he misses school again, he will be punished. Because of this, in order for him to graduate smoothly, his mother would send him to the classroom in the morning, noon and evening every day. Even after school, you can see his mother shuttling around the major Internet cafes around the school, so The classmates can often see him and his mother chasing each other, which is so spectacular.

This kind of life lasted until March 4, 2014. I heard that Xiao An never went to class again. On the morning of March 5, when a classmate passed by Xiao An’s house in class, there was a There were no shouts and cries, everything became very quiet, the door to his house was no longer open, and no one heard the quarrel between Xiao An and his mother as before. More quiet and depressive atmosphere filled the oxygen, Even breathing feels loud.

On March 6, the news came that Xiao An’s mother had passed away. After the news spread, it exploded. Almost everyone found it incredible that the person who ran to various Internet cafes in school every day, every day The woman who caught Xiao An would pass away inexplicably all the time. Finally, amidst everyone's discussions, the school came forward to confirm the authenticity of the matter. Xiao An's mother had indeed passed away. The school also stated that it would no longer hold Xiao An accountable for his previous responsibilities. , I hope Xiao An can finish high school, but the cause of death is unknown. Some students speculated that Xiao An made his mother angry to death... With this question, many people hope to see Xiao An appear in school again, But no one has seen Xiao An again. As you can see, Xiao An and his father moved to the city where I live and started a new life.

? After moving here, Xiao An completely changed. He cut off contact with everyone before and started to live a new life. He was considerate, sensible and responsible. Heart.

? But such Xiao An is often silent and often turns on the lights until dawn.

At this point, Xiao An rubbed his nose, raised his head, tears streaming down his face, I handed him a piece of paper, he took it and politely said "Thank you", I shook Shaking his head and looking at him, he said again: "Tutu, am I useless? It's me who deserves to die, I'm sorry for her." I guessed that the person he was referring to was his mother, so I said: Xiao An , this is not your fault. You are already very good now. Don’t torture yourself. What you need to do now is to live well for her. I thought that Xiao An, who has changed his lifestyle, will slowly forget that scar. But I forgot that it was an untouchable pain in Xiao An’s life. It would hurt even if I didn’t touch it. It was only later that I learned that Xiao An would often wake up from nightmares and write a letter to his mother every day. His mother's name was engraved on the hand.

? However, it is not only Xiao An who suffers so much, but also his father. Xiao An’s father is a construction worker. After his mother passed away, his father became depressed all day long. Once on his way back from shopping for groceries, , the brakes of the tricycle failed. Perhaps because of his old age, he did not hear the siren's horn, which resulted in fractures of both lower limbs. The expenses of his father's hospitalization were overwhelming for the whole family. In order to make ends meet, Xiao An went to the street to buy vegetables. This is also the reason why busy Xiao An can only be seen there.

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Fortunately, the accident did not cause Xiao An’s father to lose his legs. On the contrary, it was a blessing in disguise. Xiao An’s father also met a single man about the same age as his mother in the hospital. woman, and soon became another part of Xiao An's family. Even though Xiao An once strongly refused to accept her joining, when he saw a glimmer of light in his father's depressed eyes, he surrendered and had her. After joining, Xiao An's life gradually changed. He didn't have to stand on the street shivering in the cold winter to buy groceries, and he didn't have to worry about accidents when his father went out alone. After saving a lot of time, Xiao An He started doing what he liked, giving speeches and singing. He began to act like a normal 18-year-old boy, with the dreams and worries of his youth and fighting for them.

After knowing a series of stories that happened to Xiao An, I thought that I once regarded him as the most successful person in life, but only because I envied him and showed him to the world. Although I never really understood his life and everything he suffered, I even foolishly wanted to live like him. Not only did I feel a little ridiculous, how could I compare to such Xiao An? Everything he had was not given to him by God, but was obtained by his hard work in countless dark nights. I was just like those superficial people who only envied the beauty he showed, forgetting the hard work he put in for it. The struggle.

In the summer of 2015, I received the admission notice from my favorite university as I wished, and Xiao An was also admitted to the university of my choice. In January 2017, I returned to my hometown from Changsha and attended a class reunion. At this time, Xiao An had become even better. He stood on the stage and said: "I have heard a saying: The greatest despair in life is bankruptcy... ..." People in the audience began to boo and ask him if he had a girlfriend now. He scratched his head and said: No. Then, there was a noise around him. Someone took advantage of the situation and said to him on the stage: Xiao An, how did your mother die back then? I heard that you were mad at me? Is it true? "Oh, what a pity!" After hearing this, Xiao An was stunned for a few seconds and raised his head and said: That is the biggest regret in my life, and it is also the way I hate myself the most. I thought she would accompany me, but I didn’t know that I really lost her one morning when I woke up, but I didn’t even have the ability to support myself, but I hadn’t enjoyed enough of her care like all children, but I hadn’t given her enough care yet. She has cooked a meal, and she has not even seen me get married or have children, and I have not even had the chance to accompany her until old age. I hope that countless times she will teach me to see the world again, because of her existence, I dared to fight, drink and smoke, but suddenly one day she left without saying a word, which made me lose all the rights to try. I even had to learn to grow up, learn to be tolerant, and learn to live in harmony with the world. Learn to see clearly how numb I have been. I feel more uncomfortable with the death of my mother than any of you. It was the most difficult time for me. The silent pain makes me feel guilty..., originally noisy The private room suddenly became quiet. The girls who had been asking questions also lowered their heads shyly and stopped talking. After listening to Xiao An's words, I realized that he has really matured a lot and is no longer that person. Lin Xiaoan, who only knows how to fight, is a brand new Lin Xiaoan.

Dear stranger, do you have a person whom you think of with regret? She (he) once occupied your entire youth.