Begging for the coldest and coldest joke

This is a collection of 100 great jokes that I carefully compiled! There is always something you like! I think some of them are classics, and many of them are bad jokes. It took me a long time to collect them! I hope you like it and welcome to adopt it~~~~

1. The principal and English teacher visited a middle school in France. The principal spoke in the auditorium and the English teacher translated.

Principal: "Dear teachers and classmates!"

English teacher: "ladies and gentlemen!"

Principal: "Ladies and gentlemen!" ! ”

English teacher-_-! After thinking for a moment, he said: "Good morning!"

Principal: "Good morning!"

English teacher:... ==" Khan

2. Say There was a polar bear who had to wear sunglasses to see because the snow was too harsh. But he couldn't find the sunglasses, so he closed his eyes and crawled around on the ground to look for it. He crawled and crawled until his hands and feet were dirty. I was so embarrassed that I found my sunglasses. I put on my sunglasses and looked in the mirror, and then I realized: Oh, it turns out I am a panda

3. A polar bear stayed alone on the ice in a daze, which was really boring. He started to pull out his own hair, one, two, three, and finally there was no hair left, and then he died of cold.

4. Once upon a time, there was a bird that he would pass by every day. There was a corn field, but unfortunately, there was a fire in that corn field one day, and all the corn turned into popcorn!!! After the bird flew over...it thought it was snowing, and it died of cold.

5. Xiao Ming got a new haircut. When he came to school the next day, his classmates saw his new hair style and laughed: Xiao Ming, your hair looks like a kite! Xiao Ming felt aggrieved and ran to the school. Crying outside, he flew up.

6. The spider fell in love with the butterfly, but the butterfly rejected it. The spider asked: Why? The butterfly said: My mother said.

7. On a hot summer day, two bananas were walking on the road. The banana in front suddenly felt very hot. He said, "It's so hot." , I wanted to take off my clothes, but he peeled off the skin. Then the banana with the clothes off turned into a dried banana~

8. , three explorers finally found the "Valley of Hope". Legend has it that as long as you stand on the edge of the valley and shout what you want, and then jump into the valley, you will get what you want in a pit full of valleys. So the three of them decided to give it a try

The first one was a pervert, so he yelled "Woman!" woman! "If he jumped down, there would be a lot of beauties waiting for him.

The second one was a nerd and shouted "Books, books, books!" "Then, he jumped into the valley and got a lot of books.

The third one was an indecisive person. He couldn't decide on his favorite after thinking about it. After an hour, he Finally he made up his mind and felt that banknotes were the most useful, so he walked towards the edge of the valley. When he accidentally kicked a stone, he cursed "shit!" "Unexpectedly, his center of gravity was unstable and he fell down the valley

9. As for Xiao Ming, he has to take the exam tomorrow, but he is watching TV at night

Xiao Ming's mother asked worriedly: "I have read all the books. Are you done? There’s a test tomorrow.

Xiao Ming replied cheerfully: Mom, I’ve finished reading.

Xiao Ming’s mother happily praised Xiao Ming: “Good boy, you will definitely pass the test tomorrow.” Very good

Xiao Ming cried and said, "Mom, I see, it's over."

10. The panda loves the deer deeply, but he expresses his love. Rejected. Panda yelled~Why? Why is all this happening? Xiaolu said timidly: My mother said that those who wear sunglasses are bad boys.

11. One day Xiao Ming was walking on the road. ! My feet suddenly feel sore while walking! Why is this happening? Because Xiao Ming stepped on a lemon!

12. Which Chinese character is the coolest?

Jin" said to "Coin": Son. When you put on your doctorate hat, your worth will be a hundred times greater.

"Chi" said to "Jin": Sister, the results are out. You are pregnant with twins.

"Chen" said to "Ju": The area is the same as yours. I have three bedrooms and two living rooms.

13. One day, a university teacher asked a student, there are ten birds in the tree, if one is shot and killed, how many are left?

The student asked: Is it a silent pistol? Wasn't the gunshot loud? 80-100 decibels. Is it illegal to hunt birds in this city? Don't commit. Are you sure that bird was really killed? Sure. At this time, the teacher was already impatient: "Just tell me how many birds are left, okay? Are there any deaf birds in the tree? No. Are there any that are locked in a cage and hung on the tree? No." Are there other trees nearby? Are there any other birds in the trees? If a bird is pregnant, does it count as a baby in the belly? Are there any flowers in the bird's eyes? Ten. The teacher was already sweating, and the bell rang, but the student continued to ask: Are there any birds that are so stupid that they are afraid of death? Can they kill two with one shot?

The student said with confidence: "If your answer is not deceptive, if the bird that was killed hangs on the tree and does not fall, then there will be only one bird left. If it falls, there will be no one left." The teacher immediately foamed at the mouth. Falling to the ground!

14. One day, someone passed by the intersection and discovered something super scary. He found that Kakashi and Sun Wukong were laughing!

15. For a long time! One night, there were three shrimps in the pond. Hahaha, a female ghost farted and died.

16. A female alien who was engaged in biological research came to the earth and walked around in a circle. Finally, she felt that human genes had a lot to learn from, so she captured a man and wanted to bring him back with the text information about human genes. However, the spacecraft was too small to take him away, and the information was too large. It can't be taken all at once. When she was anxious, the computer help system of the spacecraft said: "This man has a small stick on his body that can solve all your problems..." Then she suddenly realized it and said to the man with a smile. : ". . . . . Give me the USB flash drive! " .

17. There was a man who was crossing the road and was accidentally crushed by a truck. When he was dying, he looked at his body and said: "It turns out that I am a bean paste stuffer. , not stuffed with meat."

18. The little snake asked the big snake in a panic..."Brother, are we poisonous? The big snake said: "Why do you ask?" "The little snake said: "I accidentally bit my tongue just now."

19. Once upon a time, there was a little sheep. One day he went out to play and met the big bad wolf. The big bad wolf said : I'm going to eat you! ! Guess what happened?

There was a swordsman who was very cold. The heart is cold, the sword is cold, and finally it is cold to death

21. A deer runs on the road, running faster and faster, and it turns into a highway

22. There is a Tomatoes were knocked over by stones and smashed. Another tomato fell and smashed, and another tomato fell and smashed. Countless tomatoes fell and smashed. The last tomato also fell down. Tomato! Jiangye

23. The soldier asked the company commander: What should I do if I step on a mine during combat? The company commander was very angry: Damn, what can I do?

24. One day, the three little pigs built three huts to avoid being chased by the big bad wolf. The big bad wolf blew down the thatched house, the wooden house, and the brick house without any effort. The three little pigs ran as hard as they could, but they still couldn't. The three little pigs were caught up by the big bad wolf. They said in despair, "Let's give up. Whatever you want." Where?

25. The elephant pooped in the middle of the road. An ant happened to be passing by. It looked up at the mist-shrouded peak and couldn't help but sing: Yalasuo, this is the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau! approximately When bringing paper, don't worry, the frog will tell you: stick scrape, stick scrape, stick scrape!

27. Two counterfeiters accidentally made fake banknotes with a face value of 15 yuan. They decided to spend it in a remote mountainous area. When they bought a 1-yuan candied haws with a 15-yuan piece, they cried, and the farmer gave them two 7-yuan pieces.

28. Someone’s new one. The phone happened to be rented out by the cinema, so people often called to ask about the movies being screened. At first, he always explained nicely that the phone no longer belonged to the cinema, but now belonged to him. Please don't call again in the future. As time went by, he felt very annoyed, so when he received such calls, he simply said: "You dialed the wrong number! "This also saves some saliva. One day, a familiar voice came from the other party: "Excuse me, what movies are showing now? He said as usual: "You made the wrong call!" After a period of silence, the other party replied: "Is it a domestic film or a foreign film?"

29. A person climbed the wall and left the school. He was caught by the principal. The principal asked: Why don't you leave through the school gate? The answer is: Metersbonwe does not take the usual path. The principal asked again: How did you get over such a high wall? He pointed to his pants and said: Li Ning, everything is possible.

The principal asked again: What does it feel like to climb over the wall? He pointed to the shoes and said: Xtep, it feels like flying. On the second day, he entered the school through the main entrance. The principal asked: Why didn't you climb over the wall? He said: Anta, I choose, I like it. On the third day, he wore a gangster costume, and the principal said: You can't wear a gangster costume! He said: You are what you wear, Semir clothing. On the fourth day, he wore a vest to school. The principal said he could not wear a vest to school. He said, men, keep things simple and love Dengbao clothing. The principal said I'm going to give you a serious offense. He said: Why? The principal said, M-Zone, I have the final say on my territory.

Life at 30 is really boring. Last month, a buddy of mine borrowed 4,000 yuan from me and said he wanted to have plastic surgery. As a result, I don’t know what he looked like now. Oh4000 piece.

31. Note to robbers: Our bank staff only understand Spanish. Please be patient when robbing. It is best to bring a translator with you. Thank you!

32. You are blind Blinded? You can't see such a big shield, but you want to throw a stone at my head!

33. I think I should lose weight. The last time I donated blood, a hundred milliliters of lard actually leaked out.

34. Tourist: Master, is that thatched house over there a toilet? Monk: Except for the thatched cottage, the rest of the place is a toilet.

35. The hair is gone and the dandruff is even better!

36. We should keep quiet when listening to sermons in church. It is very impolite to disturb others' sleep.

37. Yesterday I signed up for a weight loss training class. They asked me to wear loose clothes during training. Is this unreasonable? If there are loose clothes, then why should I sign up?

38. My wife and I haven’t spoken for 18 months, and I have no chance to interrupt her.

39. Thief A: Count how much money you robbed today? Thief B: No, I’ll find out by reading the newspaper tomorrow.

40. Stand higher and pee further

41. Go your own way and let others take a taxi.

42. Wear other people’s shoes, walk your own path, and let them find it.

43. Late one night, a young woman was passing by a mental hospital when suddenly a "wow" sound came from behind. The woman turned around and saw a naked man chasing her. The woman was so frightened that she ran away, followed by the man behind her. No, there is a dead end ahead. The woman is desperate. She knelt on the ground and cried and begged: "You can do whatever you want. I just ask you not to kill me." The man smiled slyly and said, "Really? Now you Start chasing me."

44. At a literary evening, the host came on stage and announced: Please enjoy: Xinjiang singing and dancing, lift your skull! The whole place was silent and terrifying! ! ! Cold~~~

45. If a tiger doesn’t send a cat, you think I’m critically ill!

46. A person in our dormitory had to pee after drinking too much and then made a cold remark: If you drink too much pee, you will have too much wine.

47. My sister and I went to Li Ning to buy shoes. My sister said, "Miss, how much do these shoes cost per pound?"

48. In the past, people came to my aunt's house as a guest. Just walked in. It happened that my aunt had to go to the toilet. She quickly greeted the guests and said: "You guys sit down, sit down, I'll go to the toilet and pour you some tea!"

49. When I was in college, a classmate and I were arguing about a problem, and I was at a disadvantage for a while. He slapped the table and stood up shouting: You are talking nonsense, I am not stupid! I spit on your shit

50. When I was young, the popsicle and ice cream sellers usually pushed bicycles to sell ice cream. Once, I heard an aunt in the house shouting: New ice cream, hot. (I guess my aunt used to sell fried cakes and fried dough sticks)

51. When my colleague was arguing with someone, he got anxious and said, "Do you think I grew up eating?" I have always wondered what he ate to grow. Big ones. "

52. Once when a KTV requested a song, a girl shouted loudly: Please order me a song "Double Jay Chou" by Zhou Jiegun.

53. One day in the big forest, the fox I was smoking marijuana. At this time, the little rabbit ran from a distance. Seeing all this, he came over and said: Fox, fox, how can you smoke marijuana? It is not good for your health. Look, the air is so fresh. Come and join me. Let's run together. The fox thought about it right, so he ran with the little rabbit. As they ran, they saw the elephant taking heroin. The little rabbit ran over and said to the elephant: Elephant, elephant, what are you doing? Take drugs, look at how fresh the air is, come and run with me. The elephant thought it was right, just the two of them were running together, and they saw the lion rolling up his sleeves and about to inject heroin, and the little rabbit was far away. He shouted to the lion: Lion, lion, taking drugs is not good for your health. Look at how fresh the air is. Come run with me... I saw the lion put down the syringe and rushed over, and gave the little rabbit a slap in the face. The elephant was trembling. Said to the lion: Why did you hit the little rabbit? He didn’t want us to hurt our bodies! The lion said: Since the rabbit took ecstasy, he asked me to run with him every day.

54. In summer, A giraffe met a rabbit, and she proudly showed off her neck to the rabbit: Oh, little rabbit, do you know how nice it is to have a long neck? Do you know how fresh and sweet those top leaves are? Do you know the feeling of drinking water in summer? The refreshing water slowly passed through the neck. Rabbit glanced at her and only said: "Have you ever tried to vomit?" ”

55. Once my brother hit me, and a bag was placed on my head. Later, when my brother wanted to pack something, he couldn’t find the bag, so he took the bag on my head to hold something.

56. Once upon a time, there was a marshmallow who played ball for a long time. He said: I am so tired, I feel like my whole body has softened.

57. Once upon a time, there were two snowmen. One said: I am so cold. The other said: I am also very cold. The other said: Let’s hug each other, so guess what? What happened next? Then they were so cold.

58. When I was a kid, I was dishonest about eating. In order to educate me, an old farmer said to me: Sixty years of hard work, no food, and I never threw away the boogers I picked out

< p>59. There was a rich man looking for a servant. The interview topic was to use the toilet. The first few came out without washing their hands after using the toilet. The rich man sent them away. Only one of them washed his hands, so the rich man kept him. .But one day, the rich man found that he came out without washing his hands. The rich man asked him why? The servant replied: "I brought toilet paper today..."

60. A man saw a store There was a big sale, so I walked in. "What are you buying?" "I want to buy dog ??food." "We have regulations, you must prove that you have a dog." "Where is such a regulation?" "This is what discounted goods are like." The man spent a long time with the salesperson. , the salesperson still refused to sell it to him and there was nothing he could do. The man had to go home and bring the dog with him, and then he bought the dog food. A few days later, the man went to the store again to buy cat food and said, "Give me two boxes of cat food." "We have regulations, you must prove that you have a cat." It was the same salesperson, and the man spent another long time with her, but still couldn't get the result. I bought cat food without going home and bringing the cat with me. A few days later, the man came to the store carrying a large cardboard box with a hole in it. He asked the salesperson, "What are you buying?" "You'll know when you put your hand in." The salesperson put his hand in and said, "What is it?" "Yeah, it's sticky." "I want to buy two rolls of toilet paper." 61. A man went to visit his grandmother with his friends. While he was talking to his grandma, his friend started eating the peanuts on the coffee table and finished them all. As they were leaving, his friend said to grandma, "Thank you for the peanuts," and grandma responded, "Oh! Yeah. ! Alas! Since I lost all my teeth, I can only suck the outer layer of chocolate.

Some people like the dish "Spicy Vermicelli Pot". One time, he went to a restaurant and ordered this dish again, but the waiter told him that it was sold out. "Is it really sold out?" he asked in disappointment. "Sir, it's really sold out." You see, the last one was sold to the gentleman at that table. "The waiter replied. The man followed the waiter's instructions and saw a very respectable gentleman sitting next to him. The gentleman had almost eaten his meal, but the "Spicy Vermicelli Pot" was still full. The man He felt that the gentleman was wasting delicious food, so he walked up to the gentleman, pointed to the "Spicy Vermicelli Pot" and asked politely: "Sir, do you want more of this?" "The gentleman shook his head gracefully. So the man immediately sat down, picked up the spoon and wolfed it down. After a while, he was halfway through the meal, and suddenly he found a very small but full-furred one lying at the bottom of the casserole. The little mouse felt disgusted and vomited all the vermicelli he had eaten back into the casserole. When he was turning his stomach, the gentleman looked at him with sympathy and said, "It's disgusting, isn't it?" It's the same..."

63. On this day, the hotel owner was patrolling the lobby. A beggar came up and said, "Can I give you a toothpick, boss?" "The boss sent him away. After a while, another beggar came and asked for toothpicks. The boss thought to himself, why did the beggar ask for toothpicks instead of rice? He also sent him away, not too old, and again A beggar came. The boss said to him, "Are you here to ask for toothpicks too?" The beggar said: "Someone vomited, but I was a step too late. The two beggars in front had already eaten everything I could eat, and now only the soup is left." Can you give me a straw?

64. The eldest and second child were on a plane, and the second child got airsick and kept vomiting. One bag was full of vomit, so the boss had to go get it. When he came back, he found that everyone on the plane was vomiting. The eldest son asked the reason and the second son said, "I saw that this bag was also full of vomiting, so I had to drink half of the bag, and they all vomited."

65. A priest is playing golf. , a nun was watching. The first shot missed, and the priest cursed: "TMD, missed the shot!" Hit again, and the priest cursed again: "TMD, missed the shot again!" The nun said: "As a priest, you God will punish you for using bad words." As soon as he finished speaking, a thunderbolt struck the nun to death. The priest was puzzled: Why was it me who cursed, and why did he kill the nun? At this time, the voice of God was heard from the sky: "TMD, I missed the shot too!"

66. The head coaches of the football teams of China, Japan and South Korea came to heaven together and asked God about their respective football teams. Only when will it be possible to win the World Cup? God said: South Korea needs 50 years. The Korean coach burst into tears: I can’t see him anymore. God said again: Japan needs 100 years. The Japanese coach burst into tears: I can’t see him anymore. The Chinese coach quickly asked: Where are we? God cried loudly: I can’t see him anymore.

67. Three little white rabbits picked a mushroom

The two older ones asked the younger one to get some wild vegetables to eat together

The younger one said I If you don’t go, you will eat my mushrooms when I leave

The two older ones said they can’t do it, so don’t worry, so the little white rabbit went~~~

Half a year passed The little white rabbit hasn't come back yet, and the big one says it won't come back, let's eat it. The other big one said, "Wait a little longer~~~" A year has passed and the little white rabbit hasn't come back yet. The two big ones discussed, "No need to wait, let's eat."

At this moment, the little white rabbit suddenly jumped out of the jungle nearby and said angrily: Look! I knew you were going to eat my mushrooms

68. We say that a bear without a tail is called a koala. So what do we call a bear without a penis? The answer is a female bear, because a female bear does not have a penis in the first place

69. Once upon a time, there was a steak that was medium rare and a steak that was medium rare. Why don't they say hello when I meet steak on the street?

Because: they are not familiar with each other...

70.Q: One day, the little bird flew from Kaohsiung to Taipei to spend 1 Hour. But it took 2 hours to get back! WHY?

Because it was raining! So you have to cover the rain with one hand and fly with the other.

71.Q: What chicken is the fastest in the world? What kind of chicken is slow? A: KFC Chicken Nuggets (fast) Nicole Kidman (slow)

72. On the plane, a stewardess asked a little girl: "Why does the plane fly so high without hitting the stars?" What?"

The little girl replied: "I know, because the stars will 'flash'!"

73. May I ask: Who gave me the Wangqing Water?

Answer: Aha~~~

Reason: “Aha, give me a cup of forgetful water~~~~”

74.Q: What animal Easiest to be pasted on the wall?

A: Poster Leopard

75. Which one is dumb, the stars, the moon or the sun?

Stars, Because: There is a line in Lu Binghua's song: The stars in the sky don't speak

76. Four people were playing mahjong in the house. Why did the police come and take away five people?

Because the person they play is called "Mahjong"

77. There is a family, and the whole family is very lazy. The father asked the mother to do housework. If the mother didn’t want to do it, she would ask the eldest sister to do it. If the eldest sister didn’t want to do it, she would ask the younger sister to do it. But the younger sister didn’t want to do it either, so she would ask the puppy to do it. One day a guest came to the house and found the puppy doing housework. It was very strange. surprise. Asked the puppy: "Puppy, can you do housework?" The puppy said: "No way, they don't do it, they ask me to do it." The guests are even more surprised, you can talk!!! Puppy: Shhh! Keep your voice down, otherwise they will know that I can talk and ask me to answer the phone again...!!

78. Lele Youtian He went to the zoo to feed the monkeys...throwing peanuts to the monkeys...but there was a monkey who would stuff peanuts into his butt every time...and then take them out to eat...Lele felt disgusted and ran to ask the director...why that monkey had This kind of strange behavior... The director explained: Because last year, a person threw a big peach for him to eat. As a result, the big peach's seeds could not be smoothly discharged from the buttocks... He suffered miserably... so now he must first Put the food into your butt and measure it, make sure it can be pulled out before you dare to eat...

79. Demon King: "Princess, no one will come to save you if you scream and break your throat!"

Princess: "Broken throat!"

No one: "Princess! I'm here to save you!"

Devil: "What the hell..."

Ghost: "Who discovered me?"

Who: "What does it have to do with me?"

The devil is dead! !

80. Once upon a time, there was a white cat and a black cat. One day, the white cat fell into the water. The black cat rescued it. The white cat said something to the black cat< /p>

Excuse me...what is this sentence? Answer: Meow...

81. The little white rabbit jumped to the bakery and asked: "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

Boss: "Ah, I'm so sorry, there aren't that many"

"That's it..." The little white rabbit walked away dejectedly.

The next day, the little white rabbit jumped to the bakery and asked, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

Boss: "Sorry, there are still none."

"That's it..." The little white rabbit walked away dejectedly.

On the third day, the little white rabbit jumped to the bakery and asked, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

The boss said happily: "Yes. Yes, we have a hundred buns today!”

Little White Rabbit took out the money: “Great, I’ll buy two!”

82. Team: Where is the fire?

Caller: My house.

Fire brigade: Where is it?

Caller: In the kitchen.

Fire brigade: I mean how do we get there?

Caller: Don’t you have a fire truck? !

83. The coffee cup and the water cup were crossing the road together. At this time, an old man shouted, "Be careful, it's a red light now." But after a while, the coffee cup passed smoothly. I walked onto the road, but my water glass was hit by a truck and water poured into it. Why? Because the coffee cup has "ears", the water cup does not.

84. Two tomatoes went shopping. The first tomato suddenly walked very fast, and the second tomato asked: "Where are we going?" The first tomato did not answer, and the second tomato Asked again. The first tomato didn't answer yet, so the second tomato asked again.

The first tomato finally turned around slowly and said: Aren't we tomatoes? Can we talk?

85. Xiao Ming and his classmates guessed "Andy Lau"

Xiao Ming shouted loudly: "He is one of the four heavenly kings!"

The classmate said confidently without hesitation: I know it is "Sun Wukong!"

86. The little penguin asked his grandma one day, "Grandma, grandma, am I a penguin?" "Yes." "Of course you are a penguin." The little penguin asked his father again, "Dad, am I a penguin?" "Yes, you are a penguin. What's wrong?" "But, why do I feel so cold?" ”

87. Three college students were kidnapped. The bad guys tied him to a telephone pole and asked him, "Where are you from?" If you don’t tell me, I’ll electrocute you! College student A: I am from Jiaotong University, College student B: I am from Peking University, College student C: I am from Radio and Television University (Electric Power University)! As a result, he was electrocuted to death....Han~~~

88. Once upon a time, a horse entered a bar, sat at the bar and asked the bartender for a glass of wine. The waiter said: You His face is so long...

89. The prisoner was executed. Due to the poor quality of the bullets, the first shot did not go off, and then the second shot was fired. . . The third shot. . . At this time, the prisoner cried, hugged the bailiff's thigh and said: Brother, please strangle me to death! It's so damn scary...

90. Three people were competing in marksmanship, with a black man holding something as a target.

The first man placed an apple on the black man’s head, then raised his hand and shot the apple to pieces 10 meters away. He blew the gun and said: I 'm Zorro!

The second man put a cherry on the black man's head, and then, 50 meters away, he raised his hand and shot the cherry to pieces. He blew on the muzzle of the gun and said: I' m007

The third man put a sesame seed on the black man’s head, then raised his hand and shot the black man’s head 100 meters away, and he also blew The muzzle said: I'm sorry

91. Xiao Wang works in the personnel department on the 10th floor. A month ago, he was transferred to the administrative department on the 9th floor... Today, classmate Xiao Wang Called the HR department to find him: "Is Xiao Wang here?"

The colleague who answered the phone said: "Xiao Wang is no longer in the HR department."

Classmate Xiao Wang: "Ah! ?, when did it happen? Why didn’t I know? I haven’t had time to send him off yet?”

“It doesn’t matter, you can go find him below.”

92. Wife Flower She spent a lot of money on plastic surgery and returned home a beautiful woman in a few days! When he entered the door, he said to his confused husband, "What? You don't recognize me anymore?" The husband was stunned for a moment, and then said in surprise: "Come in, my wife is not at home."

93.1 A woman was walking at night when she suddenly saw a man walking towards her with open arms, making a hug, and then stepped forward and kicked her. The man fell to the ground and cried loudly, saying: He is already a third piece, I have offended someone, bring a piece of glass. Is it so difficult to go home?

94. I was chatting with a group of female colleagues this afternoon. Suddenly someone said that I was not a man. The girls all laughed, but one of them was the coolest and said, "Just take it out and I will take out my ID card"

95. A little boy went to the countryside to spend the holidays with his relatives. His relatives lived in a farm. The children played happily and saw many things they had never seen before. When he returned home,

he told his mother everything. He said the one that impressed him most was a sow with her piglets.

What does a sow do? The child said: "The piglets chased the sow and then they turned the sow over and started tearing off the buttons on her belly."

96. Mom: "Son, son! Come on! 'It is too Easy! 'What is it?'

Son: "'It's too easy.'"

Mom: "Why don't you tell me it's easy?"

Son: "Ah, it's just 'too simple'!"

Mom: "You think I won't hit you, right?"

After finishing her words, she gave her son a lesson.

Then, the mother asked:

"What do you mean by the word 'what'?"

Son: "'What'."

< p>Mom: "What do you mean when I say 'what'?"

Son: "'What'!"

After that, the mother taught her son another lesson...

After the punishment, the mother asked again:

"Okay, I'll ask you again, just tell mom and it'll be fine."

Son: "Yeah U_U~.

”

Mom: “I often hear people say ‘fxxk’. What does it mean? "

Son: "(Woo)..."

97. The rogue said: "People call me rogue, which sounds nice! "

The warrior said: "People call me warrior, which sounds nice! ”

The master said: “People call me Gaoren, which sounds nice! ”

The swordsman said: “You guys chat, I’m leaving first

98. The student from the Normal College said: I am from the “Normal College”

Railway College Students from the Vocational College said: I am from the "Iron College"

Students from the Vocational College said: I am from the "Vocational College"

Students from the Technical College said: You guys chat, I'll leave first Yes!

99. White Jade said: My name is Bai Yu.

The green jade said: My name is Biyu.

Red Jade said: My name is Hongyu.

Apricot Jade said: You guys chat, I’m leaving first

100. Zhang Liangying said: “The fans who admire me say: My idol is named Ying”

He Jie said: "The fans who admire me say: My idol is called Jie"

Zhou Bichang said: "The fans who admire me say: My idol is called Chang"

Li Yuchun said: "You guys chat, I'm leaving first

You can make do with life, but you can also be particular about life!