# Norwegian forest

I think of many things I lost in my past life journey-wasted years, people who died or left, irreparable regrets.

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20 19-08-06

At that age, no matter what you see, feel and think, you will always return to your hands like a dart.

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20 19-08-06

I hope you can remember me. Remember that I used to live like this and stay with you like this.

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20 19-08-06

Maybe there is a dark place in my body called memory placement, where all my precious memories are piled up and turned into a pool of mud.

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20 19-08-06

In the final analysis-I think-an incomplete article container can only hold incomplete memories and incomplete thoughts.

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20 19-08-06

I hope you can remember me, remember that I once existed like this.

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20 19-08-06

I'm eighteen years old, I just went to college, I don't know anything about Tokyo, and it's the first time I live alone.

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20 19-08-06

Therefore, I can't help feeling once again that there are all kinds of hopes in the world and different purposes in life.

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20 19-08-06

Original text: "More or less, everyone will feel that way." I said, "Everyone wants to express themselves, but they can't express themselves accurately, so they are restless."

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20 19-08-07

There is only one thing I have to do, that is, I don't want to think too deeply about anything and keep a certain distance from everything.

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20 19-08-07

The two of us walked aimlessly in the streets of Tokyo, uphill, across the river, across the railway crossing, and so on. There is no clear destination, just go anyway. As if holding some kind of religious ceremony to save the soul, I took a special road wholeheartedly. Take an umbrella when it rains.

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20 19-08-07

Put on a sweater and suddenly feel the breath of the new season.

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20 19-08-07

Maybe I have a hard shell inside, and there are very few things that can break through the shell. Probably because of this, I can't be single-minded to people.

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20 19-08-07

This can't be explained and doesn't need to be explained, so we have to let nature take its course.

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20 19-08-07

So, I'm from eighteen to nineteen. The sun rises and sets, and the national flag rises and sets.

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20 19-08-07

Seeing that I always read alone, the people in the dormitory decided that I wanted to be a writer. Actually, I don't particularly want to be a writer. I don't want to be anything.

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20 19-08-07

While staring at the shining light particles in the silent space, I tried to determine my inner coordinates. What am I pursuing? What do people want from me? I can't find the right answer. From time to time, I reach out to catch light particles floating in space, but my fingertips can't touch anything.

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20 19-08-07

Besides, The Great Gatsby has always been an excellent work for me. Excited, I habitually pulled The Great Gatsby out of the bookshelf, opened a page and read the last paragraph. Never let me down once, not a page is boring. What a wonderful masterpiece!

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20 19-08-07

Yongze is a man who combines several opposite qualities, and these qualities are shown in extremely extreme forms. Sometimes he is so enthusiastic that I almost feel grateful, and sometimes he tries his best to play tricks on people. He has an admirable lofty spirit, and he is also a hopeless secular thing. He can proudly lead the crowd forward, while his heart is struggling alone in the dark mire. I was clearly aware of his inner contradiction from the beginning, but others turned a blind eye, which was really puzzling. He also crawled on the road of life with a cross on his back.

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20 19-08-07

Original: Eighteen follows nineteen, and nineteen follows eighteen-this is ideal, but she is twenty after all.

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20 19-08-07

This kind of boring mood, I can neither send it out nor hide it anywhere. It has no outline and no weight, just like a gust of wind, I can't even wrap it around me. The scenery passed slowly before my eyes, but its language failed to reach my ears.

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20 19-08-07

The faint river flows along the street. The weak sound waves formed by the intersection of various stereos are like clouds lightly caged over the market.

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20 19-08-07

I closed my eyes and immersed myself in the shadow of memory for a long time. The wind reached my ears more clearly than usual. The wind was not strong, but it left an incredible track when it blew past me. When I opened my eyes, the summer night was already a little deep.

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20 19-08-07

The faint light, like a lost soul, wandered in the dark and heavy night.

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20 19-08-07

So, I made up my mind to regard the university as a training camp: to train my tolerance for boredom.

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20 19-08-07

This guy is a mere mediocrity: he doesn't say anything to others, just mind his own business and have a lot of fun from it.

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20 19-08-07

Original text: "Like loneliness?" She put her chin in her hand and said, "Do you like traveling alone, eating alone and sitting alone in class?" ? "Where will someone like loneliness! Just don't make friends This can only be disappointing. " I said.

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20 19-08-07

Original text: "I don't particularly like it, it doesn't matter."

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20 19-08-07

I thought to myself: the real enemy of these boys is probably not the state power, but the exhaustion of imagination.

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20 19-08-07

Original text:. For example, there are such outing routes, such legends, such flowers, such birds, such and such,

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20 19-08-07

Trams run under the eaves of every household. Ten potted tomatoes were lined up on the clothesline of a family, and a big black cat was crouching in the sun. The child blowing soap bubbles in the yard flashed into his eyes, and Ishida's beautiful song came into his ears from nowhere. There is even a curry smell floating in the nose. Trams meander like sewing needles in densely populated residential areas. Several people came on the road. The three old women were close together and talked tirelessly about something.

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20 19-08-07

Original text: "That's because, in the eyes of others, you are a role that others don't like and don't care about. Some people may be embarrassed about you. "

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20 19-08-07

Original: difficult! "Qing Zi said. Then I looked at the cigarette and thought for a while, and then said, "Maybe I waited too long. I'm looking for the perfect thing, so it's difficult. "

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20 19-08-07

It takes a long time to swallow that breath. In the end, I can't even tell whether I am dead or alive, but I only feel pain. "Qing Zi put Marlboro in his mouth," I'm afraid of dying like this. In other words, the shadow of death invades the territory of life step by step, and when it is detected, it is already dark and nothing can be seen. In that case, even people around me think that I am not so much a living person as a dead person. That's what I hate. I can't stand it. "

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20 19-08-07

Original text:. Just like the school lunch break in the past. However, after a long time, I suddenly noticed the fact that everyone seemed to be very happy. Whether they are really happy or just seemingly happy, there is no way to know. But in any case, on this exciting September afternoon, everyone seems to have a good time, but I feel lonely as never before, and I feel that I am the only one who is out of place in this situation.

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20 19-08-07

I wandered around the bustling streets of Shinjuku for three and a half hours on weekend night, and I couldn't help feeling that my so-called sexual desire was simply obscene.

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20 19-08-07

Everything seems to be sandwiched between two or three pieces of glass, illusory and dreamy.

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20 19-08-07

Immersed in rambling thoughts

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20 19-08-08

Original: rhetoric, whitewashing, and fraud.

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20 19-08-08

Things that were almost unexpected in the past came to mind one after another, some were excited and some were a little sad.

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20 19-08-08

I am completely immersed in the spring of unexpected memories.

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20 19-08-08

In this room, I slept soundly, as if trying to drain every cell of fatigue drop by drop.

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20 19-08-08

When I woke up, my watch pointed to 4: 35. The color of the skylight has changed a little, the wind has stopped long ago, and the shape of the clouds is slightly different.

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20 19-08-08

I feel like I'm alone in the orderly ruins.

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20 19-08-08

The air is filled with the smell of dusk. From the window of the living room, you can see the ridge lines of trees and mountains. There is a faint glow on the ridge line, just like a layer of light.

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20 19-08-08

However, in the quiet time of eating in such an environment, I inexplicably miss the noise of people coming and going. That laughter, that empty and boring cry, that grandstanding voice, all make me feel kind. I was really tortured by noise before, but once I ate fish in this wonderful silence, my heart always seemed to lack a sense of sureness.

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20 19-08-08

It happened six months ago, but it seems to me that it has been a long time.

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20 19-08-08

Yin Hui, the bright moonlight shines into the window, dragging the shadows of things long, just like a faint layer of ink printed on the wall.

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20 19-08-08

Original: full of emotion, wit, warmth and intimacy, full of joy in the performance itself.

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20 19-08-08

If you think that's okay. Because that's your life, and it's up to you to decide. What I want to say is, I hope you don't tire yourself out in an unnatural way. You got it? That's the biggest loss. Nineteen or twenty years old is the key period of personality maturity. It is true that if you spoil yourself unnecessarily during this period, you will feel pain when you get old.

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20 19-08-09

Although my face is only 30 centimeters away from her, I think she is several light years away.

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20 19-08-09

Original: The sky is as clear as washing, blue, and only intermittent clouds vaguely wipe off a few wisps of pale white, just like a few strokes painted by an artist when trying to paint.

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20 19-08-09

A wind with the smell of grass blew through the eaves gallery, and the ridges of the mountains clearly floated before our eyes.

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20 19-08-09

Compared with myself, I am much more patient with others, and it is easy to find the good side of each other. I am this type of person.

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20 19-08-09

There are such people in the world: although they have excellent talents, they can't bear systematic training and will eventually squander their talents into pieces.

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20 19-08-09

But that's it. They won't go any further. Why? Because I don't work hard, I don't want to work hard, I don't want to train, and I get carried away in love.

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20 19-08-09

Original: accurate and keen observation, appropriate expression, irony and humor can arouse people's feelings.

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20 19-08-09

No matter how you explain it, the world can only believe what it wants to believe. The more we struggle, the more embarrassed we are.

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20 19-08-09

The night and the sound of rain gently embrace us.

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20 19-08-09

It's foggy everywhere, but for the waterline of a depression and the sound of raindrops dripping along the eaves, it's almost imperceptible. When I woke up, there was a milky mist outside the window. As the sun rises, the mist drifts with the wind, and the ridges of miscellaneous forests and mountains are exposed bit by bit.

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20 19-08- 10

Out of the store door, the clouds that had vaguely covered the sky dispersed, and the twilight sunshine gently poured down the street.

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20 19-08- 1 1

The longer time goes by and the farther away from the narrow world, the more I doubt whether what happened that night really happened. If you think it is an illusion, it seems to be an illusion. But as far as illusion is concerned, the details are too obvious. If it really happens, it will be perfect-whether it is the shape of Naoko or the Yin Hui of the bright moon.

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20 19-08- 1 1

Original: It means that many people appear together, everyone has his own situation, reason and reason, and everyone is pursuing self-righteous justice and happiness. Then, everyone was in a dilemma. That's understandable. The justice of all people can't prevail objectively, and the happiness of all people can't be realized satisfactorily, which will inevitably lead to chaos.

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20 19-08- 1 1

Original text: "If only there were a god of liberation in the real world! Whenever there are difficulties, God comes down from the sky and solves the problems one by one-nothing is happier than this.

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20 19-08- 1 1

Original text: "Eating delicious food is a good thing and evidence of vitality."

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20 19-08- 1 1

It is very pleasant to miss you in a warm bed. In a trance, I feel that you are beside me, hunched over and sleeping soundly. If this is true, how beautiful it would be! I guess

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20 19-08- 1 1

I don't study on Sundays. I spend all my spare time in the library, so I have nothing to do on Sunday. Sunday afternoon is quiet, peaceful and lonely. I read books and listen to music alone. Sometimes I will recall the route we took on Sunday when you were in Tokyo. The clothes you wear are as clear as your eyes. I can really remember a lot of things on Sunday afternoon.

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20 19-08- 1 1

With the deepening of autumn, the sky becomes more spacious and clear, and looks like a blue Wan Li. Suddenly looking up, I saw two planes dragging the airflow like a tram track and flying straight and parallel to the west.

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20 19-08- 1 1

When I can't concentrate on reading, I just look at the ceiling and think about the green son, wondering if my father really wants to say, please give me the green son. Of course, it is impossible to know the true meaning of his words. Maybe he mistook me for someone else. Anyway, on that cold Friday morning, he was dead and his heart could not be confirmed. In my imagination, he may curl up thinner and thinner after his death and then turn to ashes in a high-temperature furnace. Behind him, there is only the humble bookstore in the middle of the commercial street and his two daughters-at least one of them still smells like nerves. I thought, what is his life like? In the hospital bed, he was tortured by the chaotic head that was cut open. What kind of mood does he think of me? ? After such a period of reasoning around Lvzi's father, he gradually felt a sense of congestion and dullness in his chest, so he took back the clothes hanging on the rooftop early and went shopping in Shinjuku to kill time. The noisy streets on Sunday extended my thinking. I bought a copy of Faulkner's "Light in August" in the crowded Jiyiguo Bookstore, and then walked into a jazz bar that sounded as loud as possible, listening to the records of Ernest Coleman and Barton Bauer, drinking hot and terrible coffee and reading the book I just bought. At half past five, I closed my book and went out for a simple dinner. I can't help thinking: will it be repeated dozens or hundreds of times this Sunday? "Quiet, peaceful and lonely Sunday" ―― I said in my own voice. I don't wind up on Sunday.

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"But I won't look up and wait for the apple to fall into my mouth. I am doing my best and paying ten times as much as you. " "I'm afraid so." I admit it. "So, sometimes I look around the world and I get angry-why don't these guys know how to work hard? Why complain if you don't work hard? " I looked at Yongze's face in surprise: "In my impression, people all over the world are working hard. Am I wrong? " "That's not hard work, just labor." Yongze said categorically: "The efforts I said are very different from this. The so-called efforts refer to active and purposeful activities. " "For example, after the occupation was determined, others began to learn Spanish in a happy time. Is that so? " "That's right. I want to master Spanish completely before spring comes. I already know English, German and French, and I can basically speak Italian. Can you get these without hard work? " He was smoking, and I thought of Yoko's father. I don't think Yoko's father ever thought about learning Spanish on TV, and I'm afraid he never thought about the difference between hard work and labor. I'm afraid he is too busy to think about such things. Work itself is busy, and I have to go to Fukushima to pick up my runaway daughter.

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"Like me, he is essentially a person who is only interested in himself, but he is different in arrogance. My thoughts, my feelings, my behavior-I'm not interested in anything else, so I can consider myself separately from others. I like Watanabe, that's all I like about him. It's just that he hasn't clearly realized this, so he feels very confused and painful. "

20 19-08- 1 1

I am similar to Watanabe in that I don't want others to understand me. Yongze said: "This is different from others. Those guys try to make people around them understand themselves. But I'm not like that, and neither is Watanabe. It doesn't matter if I feel not understood. You are yourself and others are others'. " "Really?" Chumei asked me. "It's hard to say." I replied, "I'm not that strong. I think it doesn't matter if I'm not understood by anyone." There are people who want to understand each other. Just for others, even if I don't understand to some extent, I feel helpless, which I can't force. Therefore, I don't think it doesn't matter if people don't understand, as Yong Zejun said. " "What I said is almost the same." Yongze picked up the coffee spoon and said, "It's actually the same thing, just the difference between a later breakfast and an earlier lunch. Eat the same thing and eat at the same time. The only difference is the name. "

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20 19-08- 1 1

No matter how you look at it, you can't be happy with that person.

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20 19-08- 1 1

In two sundays, I will be twenty years old. I threw myself on the bed and looked at the calendar on the wall, feeling depressed.

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20 19-08- 1 1

After a while, the dreamless sleepiness as heavy as the lead door came on.

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20 19-08- 1 1

So I can't figure out for a long time whether the feeling that there seems to be a big hole in my heart is because of your absence or the change of seasons.

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20 19-08- 1 1

Original text: "Happy birthday to you." Naoko wrote: "I wish you a happy year at the age of 20."

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20 19-08- 1 1

There is nothing in front, and there is no one behind, only the dim mud stretches on and on.

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20 19-08- 1 1

Put your right foot forward, lift your left foot, and then lift your right foot. I can't judge where I am, and I have no confidence that I am moving in the right direction. I move step by step only because I have to move, no matter where I go.

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20 19-08- 1 1

I'm twenty years old. Autumn has come and winter has come, but my life remains the same.

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20 19-08- 1 1

Original: Hey, Muyue! Unlike you, I am determined to live and try my best to live well. You must be in pain, but it's not easy for me. I won't lie to you. This is also caused by you leaving Naoko alone! But I will never abandon her, because I like her, I am more tenacious than her, I will become more tenacious and mature, and become an adult-besides, I have no choice. Before that, I thought it was best to be seventeen or eighteen if possible, but now I don't think so. I am no longer a teenager, I feel a responsibility on my shoulders. Hey, Muyue, I'm not the same person I was when I was with you. I'm twenty years old! I must pay the corresponding price for my continued existence!

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20 19-08- 1 1

I only write proud events, happy feelings and good luck, only the fragrance of grass, pleasant spring breeze and bright moonlight, only movies I have seen, favorite songs and wonderful books. Between writing and reading again and again, I have comforted myself and thought how beautiful the world I live in is!

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20 19-08- 1 1

Original text: "The world is boundless." "The mountains are high and the sea is deep."

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20 19-08- 1 1

In sunny weather, boating on the beautiful lake, we will find the blue sky charming and the lake charming-the same reason. Don't be so depressed. Even if we leave it as it is, the long river of the world will still flow in its direction, and even if we do our best, the injured people will not be spared. So-called life is like this.

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